College Commuter about to graduate and freaking out!

Student Lounge College Life
1

<p>I'm in my last semester of college and I'm realizing that when I graduate I'm screwed when it comes to meeting any friends or potential boyfriends cuz I commuted for the past 3 years and have practically no friends. I'm freaking out!</p>

<p>I moved to the area a couple years ago with my parents, lost all my high school friends. Got to know a couple people since, none of whom I really click with. My ex introduced me to some people but we broke up and I lost all contact with everyone (they weren't a positive influence on my life). </p>

<p>Since moving and transferring schools, I've commuted via a school sponsored bus. I live by its schedule (saves a ton of money but sucks since I have to take a 6:30 AM bus for a 9:30 class, for example). The commute is roughly 2 hours both ways.</p>

<p>I realize after reading most of the commuter threads here that I might have done things backwards. I weakly participated in a couple activities & certainly never considered dorms (hate the atmosphere & finances absolutely don't permit). Due to the constraints of my bus schedule, I can't stick around for the meetings and my campus is pretty unsafe in the evenings. </p>

<p>I'm also an introvert and apparently not too approachable (only if you don't know me, I'm totally normal if you do).</p>

<p>I have NO idea how to change all this! I would LOVE to meet like minded people who aren't superficially social and who don't get wasted every night for fun (I like to go out to a club, have some drinks as much as the next girl, mind you). Where do I go to meet cool folks once I'm graduated (excluding the bar..)? What activities do I do? I'm not opposed to volunteering, but I have a job and am considering getting another degree (online), so I'm not gonna have a boat load of time for that.</p>

<p>So, to re-cap: still new to the area, graduating this spring, commuter, no high school friends, introvert, desperately want to establish a social life.</p>

<p>HELP!!!</p>

2

<p>You’ve lost a lot of valuable time. Not necessarily in terms of making lifelong friends. It happens, some people have buddies from college they keep in contact for decades. But many people move away after college and lose track of the friends they have, so that in itself does not make your situation unusual. </p>

<p>College is much more than just the classes you take, at least for many people, and one of those bonuses that doesn’t show up in the General Catalog is the chance to practice and improve social skills. At college you are surrounded by thousands of kids your own age, not tied down by family obligations, with a crazy amount of unscheduled time, etc. This is a scenario you are unlikely to ever be in again. Social skills are learnable and most people need to practice to get better. </p>

<p>Many colleges offer social skills groups and it might help to see if yours does. Its never too late to see if you can get something out of it. Once out of college you need to fall back on the usual things. Bars, as you mentioned, although not a great choice for many people. Take classes at a gym, many churches and the like have social groups for young adults, take a tennis class or something similar at a local CC, look for volunteer work, and so on. I’ll be honest, it isn’t as easy to meet people as it was in college, and it sure feels strange on the job when some of the people you work with are your parents age and definitely not people you’ll socialize with outside of work.</p>