College makes me want to throw up/cry.

<p>Okay. I don't even know if this is the right forum for this or what, but thinking about college basically makes me want to die inside.
I feel like my parents are really unsupportive and could care less where I go as long as I get a stupid degree. Maybe they're right? Does going to a fancy school make a difference other than quality of life or education? Isn't that enough?
My grades/scores/whatever aren't the best but I feel like I can do better than what they want me to do, which is to go to the local college for "at least four years".
Austin</a> Peay State University | Middle Tennessee
I don't know. I really want to move away to college like normal people and not stay at my parents house like a loser.
I don't want to take out too many loans. I don't know how much any of this is going to cost. I don't want to start looking at really awesome schools and get my hopes up or go through a bunch of stuff just to be disappointed.
I've basically done nothing as far as the college search goes, and I'm about to be a Senior. Hopefully it's not too late. I just feel like I have to one to turn to and everyone is just telling me my dreams are stupid, so what's the point of even trying?</p>

<p>Unweighted GPA: 3.6
Weighted GPA: 4.0
ACT: 30 (probably going to take it again)
5 APs
AP Euro: 3
AP Lang: 3
APUSH: 5
AP Lit: -
Ap Bio: -</p>

<p>My grades were really bad my freshman year, but they've improved. I've heard that colleges like that kind of thing?</p>

<p>Okay I actually kind of lied. I guess I did a little “research”.
In Tennessee there are two state scholarships I think I can get: the Hope and the Ned McWherter. Together the two scholarships would be $10,000, but I’m not sure I would get the full amount. My parents don’t want to give me money and I don’t want to take out a ton of loans. Even going to a state college like UT costs 18,000 or something.</p>

<p>Other than that, and looking at some scholarships at UT and talking to the people at UT on the phone, I’ve basically done nothing. Not gone on any tours or anything.</p>

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<p>Which is it?</p>

<p>You need to calm down, consider your strengths and interests, and clarify your situation and questions before people here can be helpful.</p>

<p>What are your parents willing to pay?</p>

<p>Parents are not perfect, and you are at the age where you get to see us through adult eyes. Know that most parents love their kids and are doing the best they can. Most of us parent in a similar way to our own parents- the only role models they had. It could be that your parents did not have role models either. It could also mean that they have not had the benefit of a good education and simply are embarrassed or feel inadequate, have limited finances or whatever,so they do not see the point in this… however you do. This does not mean they don’t love you as much as any parents.</p>

<p>You may be in the difficult position to take out loans, or stay near home to save money. Your high school record is good enough for many schools. Obviously the in state schools with financial aid are a good place to start. Berea college is an example of a “working” college with low costs. If your ACT goes up you may get some merit aid and there are posts on this board with info on that.</p>

<p>You don’t need the tours to apply to college but it is good to visit before you decide to accept an admission offer, but if you can’t visit, you can still go. Even if you ended up at the local college, you could succeed in your life. It is still worth it to apply to the ones you are interested in that could possibly give you assistance. It is important to get your parents to do the FAFSA. I don’t know what would happen if they refused- Maybe you will need a third party like a guidance counselor to discuss your potential with them and get them on board.</p>

<p>Do everything you can to get as many choices as possible…as you do not know the total cost until you apply and get accepted.</p>

<p>I’m sorry, I just get really upset about this very easily.</p>

<p>I mean they don’t care about where I go as long as it doesn’t cost them money. They want me to go to the local college so I can live with them and not spend any money.
They don’t really care where I go, they just want me to have a piece of paper after four years. I might as well go to community college or something.</p>

<p>I’m not sure. They never want to talk about it. Probably no more than like 4,000 a year or something. (Probably nothing actually… I honestly don’t know.)
My parents usually make like 60,000-80,000 a year. I don’t remember how much exactly, but it’s not enough to get most need based grants.
I understand my parents love me and want whats best, but it’s just really hard when no one is there to support you.
I thought about trying to find someone to talk to me and my parents about college, but my high school counselors are probably even less informed than me. I think my parents might even be willing to pay someone, if it’s not too expensive.</p>

<p>Many colleges take into consideration whether your parents/legal guardians are willing to pay or not. Some are more generous than others. with a 3.6/4.0 you should also be eligible for some merit scholarships as well!</p>

<p>Check out University of Dayton. They’re in the top 10 for both student satisfaction and also least indebtedness (for graduates). I had a worse GPA than you and they offered our family 35k
(some merit grants, some need based grants, some loans) to attend. That’s just one example, there are others! Do some sleuthing and you will find other options :)</p>

<p>^I’m not aware of any college that will typically give aid to students whose parents are not willing to pay unless there is an extreme situation like parents kick kid out of the house for being gay. Your test scores are good so you could get into a college that meets 100% of demonstrated need. </p>

<p>[Colleges</a> That Claim to Meet Full Financial Need - US News and World Report](<a href=“http://www.usnews.com/education/best-colleges/paying-for-college/articles/2012/02/16/colleges-that-claim-to-meet-full-financial-need]Colleges”>http://www.usnews.com/education/best-colleges/paying-for-college/articles/2012/02/16/colleges-that-claim-to-meet-full-financial-need)</p>

<p>They are mostly very selective schools though.</p>

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Lots of people stay at home. Lots do it by choice, even. It doesn’t mean you’re a loser, just that you’re staying at home.</p>

<p>Your grades and test scores are above average. What are you interested in majoring in / what are your current interests?</p>

<p>Your parents want you to get a degree, that means they care.</p>

<p>It sounds like you are in state for the University of Tennessee in Knoxville. Have you ever visited that campus with your parents? It might jump start the conversation about finances, your major, your career goals and your college hopes.
We visited the campus a couple of years ago on a football weekend and we were blown away by how spirited and friendly the campus felt.</p>

<p>I really want to move away and be kind of on my own.</p>

<p>I want to study Humanities type stuff, which I know isn’t the greatest thing to major in. I thought maybe I could get into teaching or something though. I’ve also considered law, which also I’ve heard isn’t a good field to get into.</p>

<p>I’ve been in speech club for a few years and I really like studying history. I dream about becoming a “great man” like I read about in my history books, and I figure a good way to do that is to learn a lot about the world and then get good at expressing myself and my ideals. I’m not sure if anyone values that kind of thing though. It seems like everyone is just like “I’m going to be a pharmacist!” “I’m going to become a nurse!” “I’m going to become an engineer!”
I really don’t think I want a STEM career. I’m taking AP Bio this year to sort of try and expand my interests, but so far I’ve been doing the summer assignment and not finding it super great…</p>

<p>thislimeismine,</p>

<p>There are a whole lot of useful threads in the Financial Aid Forum on the topic of merit-based aid, and there are lots of threads on need-based aid. You will also find lots of good information at [FinAid</a>! Financial Aid, College Scholarships and Student Loans](<a href=“http://www.finaid.org%5DFinAid”>http://www.finaid.org). Read through that all of that, and then ask your parents to help you run some of the Net Price Calculators at the websites of the colleges and universities that you are interested in. That way all of you will have a better notion of what your family may be expected to pay.</p>

<p>The simple fact is that nationwide more students live at home and commute to class than live on campus. If you find yourself living at home, you will be having the “normal person”'s college experience.</p>

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<p>Many, many people entering college with a particular job in mind end up changing their minds. It’s not a bad thing to enter college undecided, nor is it particularly unusual. A college education should give you life-long transferrable skills, including, as you say, “learning a lot about the world and getting good at expressing yourself and your ideals.” Many incoming college students feel the need to project assurance by telling everyone that they are are going to be “X.” I wouldn’t take it at face value.</p>

<p>I agree that you can probably get into University of Tennessee, which presumably would be reasonably affordable. And a pretty good option.</p>

<p>There are not a lot of low cost options in private colleges for middle class people.</p>

<p>There are some “out of state state” universities that are relatively reasonable for out of staters, such as LSU, SUNY Binghampton, University of Minnesota, and University of Oklahoma.</p>

<p>But you really need to sit down with your parents and see how much they are willing to pay. Perhaps they are worried about their retirement, or paying for the education of any siblings you might have.</p>

<p>Going away to school is not cheap, even at a University of Tennessee, or another reasonably priced school, when compared to living at home (where there is no dorm room, no meal plan)</p>

<p>Many smart kids have to live at home, and commute to school. That doesn’t make you a “loser”. </p>

<p>However, I would say your stats are good enough that you deserve a shot at something better, if your parents can afford it. </p>

<p>Perhaps you can convince your parents that it would be penny wise/pound foolish to send you to the school they want to send you to, because if you went to a better named school, you would likely get a better job upon graduation.</p>