Colleges DENY ME FREE LANYARDS! THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS!!

College Confidential Community
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<p>Well, you know how you get hundreds of mail pieces from colleges, some of which have prepaid return envelopes? </p>

<p>Well, one day I became severely interested in key chains and lanyards from colleges and politely requested colleges to send them to me. I mass produced several paper slips, all of which said the following:</p>

<p>"Please send me free key chains and lanyards to the following address, Thank you!" </p>

<p>I sent these requests out about 3 weeks ago to about 20 different colleges and have received NOTHING! I for one am VERY upset about this. This is the letter that I will be sending to all of the colleges that I sent lanyard applications to.<br>
To whom it may concern:</p>

<p>It has been an estimated three weeks that I have requested lanyards, key chains and other paraphernalia from your institution. It is with disgust and horror with which I write this letter, as I have received absolutely nothing. </p>

<p>Please correct me if I’m wrong, but I do recall it as being your admissions office that took the initiative to contact me. It certainly reflects poorly on you as human beings, as well as a higher education program to delay or potentially dismiss the shipping of my requested paraphernalia. </p>

<p>Your ploy to regard me as a valued student and possible future attendee of your academic sin kingdom has been uncovered – and I say, HOW COULD YOU? Your con would have seen more success with the complementary grant of key ornaments, or, dare I say, a sticker. </p>

<p>If you refuse to send me the said paraphernalia, I warn you here and now that I have no hesitation to take legal action. Conversations with my attorney have taken place and a lawsuit is one mere signature away from being filed. I am prepared to take this to the next level. </p>

<p>That being said, such could be avoided if I receive a keychain or lanyard in the next 20 minutes, and a gift wrapped t-shirt in 3 business days.</p>

<p>Threatenly,
(my name)</p>

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<p>Hahahaha...I needed a laugh. I really hope this is a joke.</p>

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<p>what a waste of time...the colleges didnt respond b/c if they gave paraphenilia to anyone they would lose money and there is a possiblility that any random person could request a lanyard and then sell it for $$.</p>

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<p>Well, I am quite sure that colleges do not receive enough lanyard applications similar to what I have requested of them to make them go bankrupt. The reason why they don't give lanyards out to "anyone" is because no one asks.</p>

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<p>LOL, just the thought of adcoms busily making lanyards while reading applications and sipping coffee... :p </p>

<p>I suspect the admissions office is more used to GETTING gifts. There was an article a few years ago about Yale receiving a hand-crafted canoe, and gifts of food are not uncommon, from what I understand. :rolleyes:</p>

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<p>So you would rather have a lanyard than an acceptance?</p>

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<p>Hahaha I hope this is a joke because i'm sure they really want to admit someone like you.</p>

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<p>:) :) :) "I warn you here and now that I have no hesitation to take legal action". uuuhhh</p>

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<p>I want some lanyards too.
Maybe we should all request some :]</p>

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<p>^^^ hahahahahahah (DOL)</p>

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<p>"That being said, such could be avoided if I receive a keychain or lanyard in the next 20 minutes, and a gift wrapped t-shirt in 3 business days."</p>

<p>Hey give them some time, come on, give them more minutes, imagine they are humans too. 20 minutes is nothing. 3 biz days is more reasonable.</p>

<p>LANYARDS till we die!</p>

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<p>When I was 7 I saved up my allowance for a month and then ate a few boxes of Nilla Wafers so I could order the Nilla Gorilla stuffed ape. Those conniving cookie monsters took my money and never sent me the Gorilla. Heartless! I sympathize with your outrage, let's picket.</p>

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<p>paraphernalia...hahaha</p>

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<p>The OP is a troll. Look at his/her post count.</p>

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<p>wow, hepstar, we never would have guessed... what would we do without your brilliant analysis haha</p>

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<p>Seriously what's the deal with colleges not sending you a landyard AFTER you have been accepted. I mean you paid the application fee, it's the least they could do.</p>

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<p>"wow, hepstar, we never would have guessed... what would we do without your brilliant analysis haha"</p>

<p>Sometimes, its hard to tell if people are serious here on CC. Some of their beliefs on the issues are so crazy, they border on insanity. I was just making sure.</p>

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<p>Thank you. I needed to laugh.</p>

<p>Hepstar: I'm thinking the liberal use of the word 'paraphernalia' should've tipped you off. :D</p>

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<p>this is stupid. I'm sorry, but college beuracracy's have more important things to do then to waste their time stuffing an envelope full of junk for someone who isn't even a student of theirs. Get over it.</p>

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<p>Hepstar, if you frequently post in the cafes, but nowhere else your post count is 0. Learn the ways of CC.</p>