<p>I would like to hear some general opinions on my essay so far. I still need to heavily revise, but I think I have a general outline here. Right now I'm afraid I'm too vague on places, so any feedback would be definitely helpful!</p>
<p>Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what lessons did you learn?</p>
<pre><code>Failure is subjective. It is just as often tangible as intangible. When one misses a deadline or fails to win a competition, there is a concrete objective. Failure in this case is tangible. But when failure comes in the form of doubt, regret, or disgust, it becomes less easy to define. And yet in either case, whether concrete of abstract, there is one facet of failure, one defining thought that unifies all cases of failure, and it is the belief that one has not lived up to their potential. With this in mind, I wish to share a particular experience of mine, the one instant where in succeeding, I nevertheless failed, quite the paradox.
It happened the summer between my freshman and sophomore year, at a week long leadership conference I was recommended to. This program brought together teenagers from all walks of life, from all parts of the world. I met students from Canada, from Malaysia, from Ukraine and even Lebanon; we were all different, both in culture and expectation. But we all shared an academic giftedness, and an ambitious desire to change the world, otherwise we would not have come. The highlight of the program was a 4-day long project designed to enforce group cohesion. In assigned teams, we were given a hypothetical premise. With a $10,000 grant, what would your group do to improve the world? The competition was judged on the basis of realisticness, practicality, and thoroughness. My group did not come off to a good start.
Back then, my youthful precociousness was manifested as egocentricism. And while I prided myself on my critical mind, I was often conscious of every single fault but my own. We brainstormed many ideas, clean water, improve infrastructure, fight disease or starvation. To every idea, I raised objections. In my attempt to figure out a perfect solution, I ended up objecting to them all. While valid critique designed to improve is certainly helpful, it should never override action and lead to impracticality.
We finally settled on a course of action, use the beneficiary effects of planted bamboo to both improve industry and purify water in an area such as Haiti. But I felt slighted and secretly contemptuous of our plan, and while I faithfully completed my part in my project, I recognize now that my secret objection certainly hindered my performance. The pivoting moment occurred when I learned that my group had won.
I felt sick to my stomach. While my teammates cheered and laughed, I felt ashamed. Was this what victory felt like? I realized that I didn’t win at all. This was their victory, not mine; I was a member of their group but not a part of the team. My own arrogance had blinded me to the whole goal of the project, group cohesion. I knew then that I never wish to feel like that again. I realized that success and happiness can not be achieved by simply winning or being right; it comes from sweat and tears. It is an internal process, one is not successful because others tell him he is, but because he believes it.
I wandered how I could change myself, how I could live up to my potential, and the answer I found was quite simple. Carpe Diem. If one wishes to do something, do it to the fullest. If I wish to change the world, wish to succeed and do something truly, I cannot stand still and let life pass by me. And this feeling is galvanizing. It is inspirational The world is so large and mysterious, and I wish to experience it all. I’m sure it is this adventurous spirit that motivated my parents to immigrate to America. And this is the crux of my desire to attend university, to attend an environment so wonderfully vivacious, full of intellectual experience and activity, and to do as much as I can. This lesson motivated me the rest of my high school career, from joining a sport, to tutoring to taking part in a state-sponsored government simulation
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