<p>^^ words of wisdom :-)</p>
<p>Agree with CPT 100%. There is a difference between sitting down at the kitchen table with the statement from the IRA or 401K and the visa bills from the last two years and the last few tax returns and thinking, “Full pay- we can totally swing this if we are careful and cut back” vs. being a few weeks away from signing off on ten plus years of frugality. Having come from a long line of frugal people, I know that unless everyone in the family is on board, it can create some miserable situations- siblings, parents, spouse, etc.</p>
<p>One parent looks at the house as an ATM machine- whatever equity is there, is meant to be tapped. The other parent remembers the day when his or her parents “burned the mortgage” and everyone was in a festive mood because “we own the house free and clear”. If you grew up feeling like burning the mortgage was a symbol of financial independence and true economic security, then having your spouse and child decide to prolong your debt by financing college seems like a slap in the face, in addition to the financial hit. But if you grew up with parents who could never “get it together” financially to help the kids reach for the stars, it feels shameful to tell your own kids, 'Sorry, not happening, take the merit money and run".</p>
<p>I see all sides.</p>