Could someone please take a look at my essay?

<p>PROMPT: Do you think that ease does not challenge us and that we need adversity to help us discover who we are?</p>

<p>ESSAY:
"The more difficult a task is to achieve, the greater the reward it grants its achiever". This statement certainly applies to a large faction of life's problems. We, as humans, are programmed to follow the easiest path to take; however, that path is not always the correct one. What differentiates those who are succesful is life from those that aren't is the former's willingness to tackle difficult and challenging tasks.</p>

<p>As one grows up and experiences high school, one can see the well-drawn line that separates those who are going to achieve in life and those that aren't. These people are placed into 2 categories, the first being the "smart" kids which consists of those willing to work on the more demanding tasks that the second group, the "dumb" kids, aren't. Also, one can notice the deep-rooted adversity or straight-up animosity exhibited by some pupils toward other "smart" ones. This is one of the traits that makes humanity very efficient in terms of bettering itself over time.</p>

<p>One of out most primal instincts is the drive to be the best at whatever field we're interested in; this is apparent in the previously discussed college acceptance races as well as in the cavemen that preceeded us. Has there been no competitive aspects in life humanity would have crumbled tens of thousands of years ago as what drives us to get the best shelter, nutrition or mate would have been non-existant.</p>

<p>However, merely competing in who can do a simple task best is not nearly enough to achieve what we have achieved so far as a species. If the likes of Isaac Newton and Albert Einstein hadn't existed to revolutionize the fields of Mathematics and Physics as they did we would have remained a species with a rudimentary view on how the world operates, and we would remain in the same stagnant state for centuries. Those 2 men summarize what it means to want to achieve more and act on that urge.</p>

<p>Human development has been, and always will be, a result of pure ingenuity and peer competitiveness wether negative or positive. An ideal society would base its schooling systems on the concept of taking the harder, more rewarding paths instead of settling for the mediocre and the non-beneficiary. Our minds work better when properly stimulated and in a world running at a pace as fast as ours that extra bit of result is very much needed.</p>

<p>If you could please rate my essay on a scale of 1-12 your help would be greatly appreciated.</p>

<p>Hits the topic spot on, I’ll give you credit for that. Ideas seem to be very interesting and relevant. Some grammar errors though, watch your verb tenses carefully when writing. Also might have gotten a tad repetitive at some point in the body. I’d give it a solid 10/12 though for a very logical approach. Good job :)</p>

<p>In order of importance…</p>

<p>*ESSAY STRUCTURE: 4/6
VOCABULARY: 5/6
SYNTAX: 4/6
USAGE: 5/6</p>

<p>Occasionally this strays off topic and some of your sentences are choppy.</p>

<p>However, to your great credit, this was far less a chore to read than most of the papers I see here.</p>

<p>*By “essay structure” I do NOT mean that you don’t have enough “examples.” Rather, I refer to the extent to which you’ve answered the question.</p>