<p>I just had my orientation and I thought it would make me nothing but excited for college but instead I have just cried and cried about leaving my family. The college I am going to is 3 hrs away and I am beginning to wish had chosen to go closer so that I can stay home and commute. I am pretty sure it is too late to change and I am thinking I would regret it but what advice do you have and is it too late to change my mind????</p>
<p>Stick it out and go!!! It WILL be hard at first - I remember crying in my dorm room after my parents dropped me off, and I was only 20 minutes from home. But I met a few nice people during that week, and soon found my niche. Be friendly and talk to everyone! All the other freshmen are in the same boat. You will do fine!</p>
<p>Well here is my orientation story:</p>
<p>In August of last year my family and I drove 4 hours to my new school. I was SO EXCITED. I couldn’t wait to finally be on my own and to meet my “future life-long friends”. But when I finally got to my school I was in for a big surprise. First of all, I was the only girl on my floor with no roommate. All the other girls had someone to go to all the orientation activities with. Since my roommate was a continuing student she didn’t move in until the day before classes started. I basically attended all the mandatory activities alone or with my orientation group. There were some activities that were not mandatory. Instead of going to them I stayed alone in my dorm and cried myself to sleep because I kept telling myself “I can’t do this. I don’t want to leave my family for this.” I was feeling terrified. The next day during the evening before my parents left my mom and my older sister sat in my dorm while I cried. My older sister told me that she could pack my stuff up and go back home if I wanted. She said that I don’t have to go to this school if it’s not what I wanted. I wanted to stay but I didn’t want to leave my family. So I toughened myself up and told my family goodbye. After they left I cried. I almost texted my sister back a few hours later to tell her to come back and pick me up. But I didn’t.</p>
<p>A day after that I went to the orientation pool party with one of the girls I met. She didn’t have a roommate either. I’m positive she was feeling more alone than me. She told me her mother had passed away a few days ago. (Always remember that there is someone with a tougher life than you.) I felt bad so I made sure to keep her by my side so that she wouldn’t feel as homesick. While we were at the pool party we sat on the edge of the pool and that was the night I met my friend Maryanne. Since that night at the pool party, Maryanne and I have had almost every meal together for the past 2 semesters. I wouldn’t say we are best friends. But just having her by my side helps remind me that I am not alone. </p>
<p>My point is that you WILL FEEL LONELY sometimes. But once you put yourself out there a little you will make more friends who will keep you company. If you stay locked up in your room and cry like I did obviously its just going to make your cry more. You’ll get depressed. You surely won’t make ANY friends. I will admit that I did not make a lot of friends last semester because I made the mistake of staying in my dorm too much. But for this coming fall I semester I promised myself that I would be braver and more social.</p>
<p>Right now you have the option to attend a school close to home and commute. I had that option too when I was crying myself to sleep during orientation. But I bravely rejected that offer. And I am glad I did. I’m glad that I had the courage and opportunity to go to college away from home. The past year had been my best year ever! I have learned and seen so much! </p>
<p>I’ll admit that I always miss my family like crazy when I am in college. I’m VERY close to them. But luckily I get to see them once a month. And remember that you’re not telling your family goodbye. You’re just telling them “I’ll call you later.”. 
Please go to that college!!! You will probably hate it at first. Try it for 2 semesters. If you still hate it after 2 semesters then by all means find a different school that fits you better. Please try it out! If you want to talk feel free to send me a message.</p>
<p>It’s completely normal to miss your family, if you can’t visit your family often, you can call or text or Skype.</p>
<p>For a lot of people, the concept of growing up and being on your own is what makes you cry. Not the distance. Give it a few weeks and you will be fine :)</p>
<p>When I first moved into my dorm, it was depressing. I felt so away from home and it all felt so foreign. Truth is though, you get used to it. Wait like a month and your college will feel like a new home. I promise. You get familiar with the area, adjusted, and your good to go. My parents gave me a ton of independence in High School, so I was more prepared than most, but I still felt scared and sad when I first came. </p>
<p>It helps to make friends and join stuff early so you get involved IMO. </p>
<p>I definitely cried a lot right before I left. In fact, I sobbed for the week before I left because I also had a really bad orientation experience and was regretting my decision to go to my school. However, you have a right to be sad and no one is going to criticize you for it! Leaving for college is a huge milestone, and you’re essentially leaving everything you knew in life behind. I am very happy that I decided to attend my school, because I love it there and I’ve found some great friends. Also, let me say that I still wasn’t sure if I wanted to stay at my school after the first semester. It took two semesters for me to truly feel at home there. So, my advice is to spend the year there, and if by about halfway through your second semester you hate it, think about transferring. The homesickness feeling doesn’t ever really leave, but it gets significantly easier to go home and then go back to school. I cried for a long time, so you can’t expect it to happen overnight, but it will get better! Good luck :)</p>
<p>I felt extremely scared and alone for the first couple weeks. It wore off. They still came every 4-5 weeks or so to check in with me and my mom regularly texted me. </p>
<p>It is only temporary. I’ll tell you what sucks. Coming back to live with your parents and not being able to find meaningful employment for a whole year. That particular situation hasn’t happened to me, but I hear it is pretty common.</p>
<p>I cried the night during my orientation, and even after freshman year I wanted to transfer closer to home (home was ten hours away). I stuck it out though and I could not have been happier that I did! It will be hard at first, but once you make some friends it will get easier. Three hours isn’t THAT far. You could easily go home for a long weekend/have old friends come visit. I don’t know where school or home is for you, but if you don’t have a car check out taking a Mega Bus to and from home. It’s super cheap and a pretty leisurely ride (TV’s, outlets, full reclining seats, tables, bathroom). </p>
<p>I know this is late but I just wanted to say thanks for your advice. Although I am still terrified to leave home and get quite upset now and then I have decided just to stick it out and go! I figure I would most likely regret not going more than going and missing my family! And my roommate seems great so far which makes me feel better!</p>
<p>OP, it is part of life.
Separation comes gradually. If it is not now, it has to be some other time, but sooner or later you have to do it.
What better way to do it that going to college. Besides its only 3hrs away!!!
I mean you should not take it that hard, they can visit you say once a month. Some people are 15 or more hours away, but they make it work.
Best of luck to you.</p>
<p>I just need to ask one more small thing. So the main thing I am worried about missing is my family every night we watch some show or movie together. And it is one of the main things we do everyday together (we do other stuff too but…) and I know I will still be able to watch the shows but I won’t have my family there to react with. How do I deal with the fact that every single night, I am going to have to deal with this huge change?</p>
<h1>11 how about make a date with your family to watch a show together and text each other while watching? It could be fun.</h1>
<p>@scholarme This is a really great idea. Spending time with them without being with them! Also having shared activities and things to talk about.</p>
<p>I wasn’t crying when I first moved in…more accurately, I had such mixed emotions about it all that I just kind of froze for the first few days, unsure how to react. Once the initial shock of being away from home wore off a bit, it wasn’t so bad. Now it’s at the point that when my parents drop me back off at my apartment after I’ve been home, it’s just “Okay, keep in contact, see you in a couple months.”</p>
<p>The point is, everyone has those same emotions you’re feeling. And of course, everyone reacts to those emotions differently. You’ll adjust once things get going.</p>
<p>@scholarme That is a fantastic suggestion! One of my current roommates did something like that on her birthday. She started a Skype call with her parents and brother, and watched a movie at the same time as them. In the case of her, me, and my other roommate, it turned out all our families watch something together on the weekend when we’re home (we’re rising juniors, for the record). So, we started doing the same thing every weekend (sans family). It was a great bonding experience when we were still getting to know each other, and gave us something to look forward to every weekend. Try organizing something like that with your new friends. Heck, see if you can organize something like that for your whole floor; one of the neighboring suites my freshman year opened their door to everyone and played a movie on Friday nights. It gave people something to do if they didn’t have something planned, and gave people a chance to meet their floor/hallmates that they otherwise may not see very often.</p>