Crying - do you do it frequently?

I’m a crier - I actually shed tears reading what makes others cry - I cry with music, films, tv shows, even playing with my D’s cat - sometimes it just kind of happens. I can cry on command too (for theater). I always feel better even if it’s just a passing moment. I’m not embarrassed or ashamed. I’ve had a lot of sadness in the past, mostly as a child. Not any longer. I assume my emotions are tied to it all. I’m also an empath.

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This is me. I tear up all.the.time. I just move through it.

A couple of days ago I cried when a customer service person was particularly nice to me. I thanked her and told her she was wonderful- and she said “I know people have tough times so I try to speak so people know I’m smiling “. That’s all it took. :smiling_face_with_tear:

Heck, I am tearing up now just thinking about it.

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Is it bad I’m getting choked up reading this thread? :joy:

I’m a crier, but I hate crying in public so I try very hard to control it.

Edited to add, I used to torture myself in high school listening to sad songs over and over. Same Old Lang Syne by Dan Fogelberg was one that comes to mind. I’m very nostalgic!

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Big time cryer here.
Someone once asked me if they could pay me to cry at their funeral. I cry at TV weddings, etc.
When something sappy is on TV, my husband almost automatically turns my way and says “you’re not crying are you?”
If I feel like I’m going to cry, and someone asks me about it, the tears start flowing, and once they start it’s hard to stop.

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I definitely seem to be in the minority here.

I’m still curious as to what makes people more likely to be criers than not. It’s not that I don’t cry ever. It’s definitely rare, but I really can’t think of my ever crying (at least in recent times) at something that is fictional.

People who cry at fictional stories are probably highly empathetic.

I am probably somewhere in the middle. A few days ago, I cried while listening to an audiobook. It was Randy Rainbow’s autobiography (he is a famous YouTube comedian who does Broadway Musical politically themed videos that are hilarious). He was relating the story of Mushi, his loyal cat friend, and having to have him put down without being able to come in and hold him due to Covid restrictions. I cried because not only am I an empathetic type, I went through a similar experience with my cat and have felt terrible ever since that I wasn’t there with her to see it through.

I cried a lot during commercials and shows while I was going through menopause, but not so much anymore.

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There’s probably something to this, in the clinical sense. I get described as very empathetic, especially for an attorney- and not because people see me cry (I do control it when in professional mode). I just can’t help but focus on the personal issues - what motivates people, how an action will impact someone, predicting responses, etc. Client meetings can be very exhausting because I am reading body language of everyone in the room and choosing words very carefully- there’s a hyper-attentiveness I usually can’t turn off. I also tend to physically feel other people’s feels, whether I want to or not.

I read somewhere that there are “super-feelers” (wrong term) who are overly sensitive to others- like if they hear someone else making noises that indicate pain (eg an “ouch” noise) they will feel it, too. Sometimes I wonder if I am more that way than others. It can be a super-power, but it can also be kryptonite.

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I have noticed since I’ve gotten older that I cry LESS at stressful times or when action is needed. I don’t know if it’s a past menopause thing or what - menopause was basically a non event for me but I sort of feel like sometimes I “feel” less.

My mom died in November suddenly. I was with her through the entire unexpected last day. I have had multiple tears over her death - moments that get triggered, laugh/cry moments of memories, tearing up finding something at her house that I’ve cleaned out. But never have I “broken down” crying. I think my kids expected more since they know I can cry (way back when) at American Idol performers, lol. Maybe it’s because I had a job to do that day - and ever since - I protected and comforted and stayed by her side that last day and then after have taken care of her estate. Each step has had a few tears - a gradual letting go and being sad but not the big devastating cry.

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I got teary recently saying goodbye to a neighbor moving to another state… a bit crazy since we really did not know them that well. Just saw them at parties with other friends and chatted (sometimes at length) at the group mailboxes etc. But they had been there 20+ years, very nice people. It was embarrassing that it was ME who was teary, as it was THEIR belongings being loaded onto the moving van.

I am terrible at funerals - have to make sure to have tissues with me. In church services, music especially can touch me. After our son, who played the church piano at Christmas and also for recital, went off to college I had a few very tough Sundays.

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I tear up at the drop of a hat. It’s been the bane of my existence my entire life. i don’t mind that books, tv shows (just started watching Call the Midwife and rarely get through an episode without tears), commercials, songs, etc. make me tear up.

But when I was in school, or at work it’s embarrassing and has often kept me from speaking up about things, and in any kind of heightened conflict with a family member, I feel I lose if I cry. It took decades to convince my H that it is no more controllable than a heightened heartbeat, and that it’s worse if he says something. Rather than doing it on purpose, I do everything I can not to.

When I was younger, I often wished I could have my tear ducts removed. I teared up just typing this.

I’d like to think I’m an extremely empathetic person, so maybe there’s something to that connection.

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Interesting to hear it might less after menopause. I hope so. I am pretty sure mine is affected by hormones, since as I mentioned it started after childbirth. My regular body hormones and stuff were minimal before I had my first kid. After it’s liked my body figured out what it was supposed to do.

But stress also affects me. Sometime I feel like if I can just get out a good cry, I’ll feel better. And if I can manage it, it works!

But It also gets worse when sick. This week I watched the hunger games series while recuperating. In the first movie, oh how I cried. I knew what was going to happen. But at the reaping, I was flat out bawling. And the logical part of me was like what the blank? And then I started giggling. And then bawling and then the hiccups started. And repeat sequence several times over the next few days.

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I’m officially post menopause and I haven’t seen any changes in my crying patterns. Can still cry at the drop of the hat.

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The legendary coach Jim Valvano, in his “Never Give Up” speech stated a successful day is one in which you do three things: laugh, cry, and think.

I’m a passionate person. Experiences raise my passion to the level of tears (not sadness - rarely, but joy, awe, etc.) I find many things moving. When that moving reaches a certain level the tears just start to flow. Could be watching my daughter sing (joy and awe), watching an inspiring moment where someone overcomes something, or even trying to comprehend the totality of human events by watching things like Schindler’s List (i guess a combination of sadness and incomprehension of how that could happen).

Suffice to say, I do experience something, at least once, each day that moves me to tears and I generally find myself grateful for the experience. Of course I find many things that bring me to laughter each day as well.

Jimmy V was right. If you laugh, cry and think, that’s a helluva day. Anything else is a bonus!

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You know, it’s funny, when I was typing out my initial response, I was trying to remember the last time I cried. It’s actually been a while! I’m post menopausal and do feel like I do not cry as much.

I’m definitely empathetic. I cry because I can imagine what the person is feeling and then get sad as a result of that. I don’t want them to be sad. I also get teary when I associate something to my own life. Like when my friend was giving her father’s eulogy, I was sad for her obviously, but then I sat there in the pews thinking about how I will feel when my own father passes and suddenly my eyes were full of tears.

Despite being the crying type, I am not an uncontrollable crier. I do not sob. My tears are usually the silent kind, except that when I cry, my nose starts to run a little and I start to sniffle.

And surprisingly, for some reason I did not get emotional when I dropped my kids off at college. There was one moment during the convocation mass for my oldest daughter when the father in front of me, I could see his shoulders shaking and could tell he was crying. Seeing that suddenly made ME emotional. I think what made him start crying was the words to the song they were singing. But I didn’t cry when I hugged her goodbye and got on an airplane to fly 3000 miles home. I was actually surprised! I think my husband was more choked up than I was! I didn’t cry when leaving both of my sons either. Maybe when my youngest leaves, as we will then be empty nesters.

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Spouses? My husband can pretty easily tear up and shed a few tears at a sad story on the news/sports or an inspirational story. He sobbed when our first dog died. I def had to take care of him then! Again, I had a job to do - care for the dog that last day and take care of husband, so that put the focus off my tears and on the task at hand.

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When I was a child, I cried every day. My parents took to bribing me so that days I didn’t cry I got a candy bar.

I have shut down a lot of things that used to make me feel strongly. Seeing my children succeed makes me cry, though. And @garland – Yes, Call the Midwife, every damn episode!!

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This thread reminds me of a movie I loved called Broadcast News, starring Holly Hunter, William Hurt, and Albert Brooks.

In the film, Holly Hunter’s character is an already high strung woman who has an incredibly stressful job as a news producer. Every day at some point she will grab just a moment to unplug her phone, close her eyes, and break into sobs. This lasts maybe 15-30 seconds. Then she wipes away her tears, squares her shoulders, and carries on.

I have always loved those scenes, as does my D2, who is also a very high strung individual. I started suggesting she do this when the stress feels unbearable, and she occasionally does.

Obviously, this is a different kind of crying than referenced in the OP, but I think having a good cry is such a release. I wish I could do it!

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I cry every time I watch Miracle or footage of the 1980 US hockey team. I feel you. I cry at everything. Happy sad laughing frustrated angry joyous. Waterworks. :sob:

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I’m probably a low-level cryer. However, the one thing that turns on the tears big time is hearing Pomp and Circumstance. Doesn’t matter is its an elementary school celebration or an Ivy League commencement. I just gush.

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Or any of the military anthems. OK, I’ll admit that I teared up during our son’s graduation when they played The Army Goes Rolling Along.

Anchors Aweigh really gets me for some reason.

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