<p>Here is a paradigm for decision making my children found helpful. I learned about it reading Gina Kolata's book "The Flu" as the approach was used by Gerald Ford in deciding about the use of the swine vaccine. The approach is called the 'Anderson approach' (I am almost sure!!) after the journalist who framed the style of question to President Ford at a news conference. It has been a consistently useful thinking approach in a wide range of situations.</p>
<p>Here it goes.</p>
<p>When you are making a decision it is most typical to have a 'going in' gut feeling or basic idea of what you want or think. But, you often want to test whether or not this initial feeling bears out scrutiny. The question to ask yourself is not 'what do I want? or 'is the alternative better' The question to ask yourself is:</p>
<p>'What would I need to hear, see or learn to make me change my mind?' </p>
<p>When my son was making visits after the options were in he had a big dilemma- big money at an honor's program or a very highly rated alternative.The highly rated alternative had been his first choice and had virtually no negatives. He decided that in order to chose the honor's program he would have to hear that: there was depth of course offerings in the honor's program in his 3 possible areas of major interest AND he would have to hear that the current participants felt their access to faculty was from the freshman year appreciably enhanced by the program. Finally, he would have to meet an array of kids who on first blush felt like 'a fit.' </p>
<p>When you are already inclined one way, the challenge is to figure out IN ADVANCE, therefore, what would you need to learn that would change your mind. He heard that in his intended majors there was varying depth, that there was better access in the Freshman year, and he had a visit with kids with whom he wasn't sure there wasn't a fit. Since the money issue was not 'on the table' for him (he would have pocketed most of it given our in advance family approach, but he had no debt at the alternative, and he had decided that for him it was not a deal breaker) he had his decision made.</p>
<p>Maybe this will help you to. or maybe it will be go with the gut all the way!</p>
<p>It's a good tool for decision making but I don't think it's the best example. His first choice school had zero negatives, he would have to have had a HUGE amount of new data showing that the other option was preferable. Not a likely scenario, especially since $$ wasn't an issue.</p>
<p>I decided to make a separate post to expand on Anitaw's comments, but take it from a different perspective. For both my kids, financial aid was strongest at their 2nd choice schools -- in my son's case, it was a school he had never visited. I think that my kids both visited in the spring with the idea that they were looking only for an indication of a strong reason NOT to attend - that is, unless their visits turned up a huge negative factor, they would go with the solution they saw as most rational financially. </p>
<p>I know my daughter didn't even want to attend an admitted student event at Barnard - but she was in town already for NYU, and I insisted. She arrived late and left early, called me told me that the admitted student event was boring and the food wasn't very good, and that she was in a hurry to leave -- and, by the way, she had made up her mind and I should send the deposit right away.</p>
<p>Since the 2nd choice with good money seemed the best option
What would I need to see to make me change my mind?</p>
<p>I need the first choice to fork out the $20,000. Straightforward.</p>
<p>For my son, in the specific case noted, the money from the other choice was nice, completely unanticipated and hence not THE key decision point as a result. Had my son found the alternative, with the money, to have matched his other needs, naturally he would have been happy to have the money. As it is he has to think about funding summers and school term personal expenses. He is not entirely funds insensitive, but neither was/is he personably responsible for what the unexpected money would have funded. It is what led him to consider the school, but not enough to make him pick it. Necessary, not sufficient!</p>
<p>True, Anitaw, but given the financials there was no real choice between second & first choice for my kids. The real "choice" was between the 2nd choice and others on their college list, including significantly less costly publics (since there is a difference between needing and wanting in terms of money). For my son it was a somewhat tougher choice, as his 3rd choice was Berkeley -- cheaper, much better known & more prestigious than 2nd choice LAC , and he didn't really want to leave the west coast -- so there was a lot more external pressure for him to opt for Cal. than the east coast LAC.</p>