deferred - now what/where?

<p>This is the first time for us going through this process. But we have already come to the conclusion that ED is bad. If there was no ED then our kids would get their decisions in Spring. Acceptance would take away some disappointment of rejection. Whereas now, with one ED rejection they are projecting that they will never get into any school. I could see how some kids would just give up and say - what's the point, I have worked so hard and it's all for nothing. No matter what we tell them, they are not going to believe that they'll be going to a school of their choice next Sep. </p>

<p>What we did to get our daughter going after her deferral from Columbia was to get a family to be her coach. This friend is looking over her essays, getting her to focus on her top 3 choices(she applying to 10), and showing her how to market herself. We also then visited a school on her list. The visit turned out to be very positive - she love the campus, the dance instructor gave her a very positive feedback and she enjoyed her meetings with some professors. Last night she said to us, "I am not so disappointed any more. Now, I'll get a chance to apply to all of those schools and there will not be any regrets." The interesting thing is that some kids from her school are already "freaking out" about their ED acceptance. They are wondering if they have made the right choices. I don't think I would want to be in those parents shoes either.</p>

<p>How about Rose-Hulman? It's small, but excellent, and your son might well receive substantial merit scholarships. </p>

<p>Rose has rolling admissions and a fairly straightforward on-line application.</p>

<p>Personally, I think U Michigan is a much finer school than either Rochester, Case or Wash St. Louis, especially in engineering. People always want to recommend U of Rochester for engineering, but it really is not an especially strong program there. </p>

<p>Look at U Mich with an open mind. Good luck.</p>

<p>A year ago, my S applied SCEA at MIT and was deferred (and later denied). We told him this was a blessing in disguise, because now he could consider other options that he hadn't really thought of before. So over the 2 week holiday break he hunkered down and sent out 5 or 6 more apps (fortunately, he had given his teachers the rec forms a few weeks before, just in case), most of which were the Common App. </p>

<p>S is now a freshman engineer at Cornell (one of his last minute apps) and really loves it - is having lots of fun (even though he is quiet too) and does not feel that it's too competitive (and his stats were a little below your S). Cornell has the top-ranked engineering program in the Ivies (not that that should matter), and its graduate school placement is good. In retrospect, I truly believe that S is happier at Cornell than he would have been at MIT.</p>

<p>If Cornell is not for your S, then perhaps he might look at RPI, as well as Case Western and CMU. Northwestern is another excellent option, as is Michigan. Speaking of Michigan, I don't know anyone who attended Michigan who wasn't completely happy with it. Wash U is much stronger in the life sciences than in engineering, so if your S prefers engineering, it may be a so-so choice. For engineers, internships are a big deal and can lead to job offers, so in deciding where to apply for college, your S should also keep in mind the geographical area where he might want (or not want) to work.</p>

<p>Good luck to him! I know how hard it is for him to keep motivated now, but if he focuses on all the other great possibilities that are open to him (or will be once he applies), especially with his stellar record, it might make it easier for him to concentrate on getting the remaining apps out.</p>

<p>What's wrong with Michigan?</p>

<p>Your son doesn't have a "safety"; he has an opportunity to attend one of the country's top research universities, located in a really nice college town, with plenty of big-name sports and related hoopla. If he wants to stop playing the admissions game and go to Michigan, why not just let him?</p>

<p>I will echo the CMU/Case/RPI recommendations, and guess what? They all take the Common Application! RPI also has the "Candidates Choice" on-line that is even easier. Case has $0 fee for electronic applications, no additional essay! CMU's supplement is fairly painless when it comes to essays (why you have chosen your major, department, or program...) He could probably knock the three of them out in a couple of low-stress hours over the holidays.</p>

<p>One of my S's friend visited RPI and loved it so much she promptly withdrew her ED application committment to her former first choice, Columbia. We visited Carnegie Mellon and really liked it, especially from the engineering point of view (btw, is ranked #8 in engineering). Have heard good things about Case, as well.</p>

<p>Both RPI and Case appear to have pretty high acceptance rates (over 70%) considering the quality of their programs, so I view them as being pretty high prob for our kids' stats. I encouraged my S to apply there to give him an alternative or two to our big flagship (UMD) if things go badly on his more competitive schools--I would be happy sending him to any of these. Also, they are both known for giving pretty good merit aid. </p>

<p>I'm sure UM is great, as well--too big and too far for us to consider.</p>

<p>Good luck</p>

<p>RPI is an excellent choice for engineering. High stats usually equates to merit aid as well.</p>

<p>You can get a smaller college experience at Michigan by getting into one of their living communities that bring together students with similar interests. They dorm together and take a seminar together. There's info on Michigan's site about it. He and you should check out this option.</p>

<p>Also check out old posts by FrecklyBecky, who got into only Michigan after her twin brother got a string of acceptances from Ivies that rejected her. She loves MIchigan, and has had an amazingly wonderful time there including getting a major role in a theatrical production her freshman year.</p>

<p>Tufts has a small ChE program; Ariesathena is a graduate of it. If ChE is the aim, then one of the best in the country is U Minnesota. For a smaller school, also look at Lehigh.</p>

<p>To the OP-- I live in a part of the country where Michigan is a very tough admit.... significantly better in both Arts and Sciences than my flagship state U, so of course, rationally speaking, I'd say, Go to Michigan. But-- it's not my kid. </p>

<p>I think you've gotten some great suggestions on schools, particularly CMU where we know lots of kids who ended up there almost by accident but really love it.</p>

<p>On the parenting side.... now would be a good time to start delivering the message that you love your son for who he is, not for what he accomplishes. There's no doubt that your son is a strong, strong student, and one ED deferral doesn't change that.... but along with helping find another school to apply to next week, you might want to keep reinforcing the message of how proud you are of him.</p>

<p>I will add that in our experience, tales of Cornell and JHU's competitiveness have been greatly exagerated. I suspect that there are 10-12 exhausted pre-meds out there who are the source of the rumors.... but Engineering in general is a highly cooperative endeavor with lots of group projects, collaborations, mixes of students with different skills and talents, which tends to produce classmates who are not all that competitive. Neither school qualfies as a dead safety, but I'd hate to think you were ruling out places that he'd be happy just because of the rumor mill.</p>

<p>When my dd was deferred from Wellesley last year, we were both devastated. We took a day off together to regroup and it made all the difference. I called a number of the college consultants to ask their advice, and was actually given about 2 hours of free advice on the phone. They said to look carefully at her essay again, since it was a very emotional one, and she was applying to a very academic school, even though it is an LAC. She also looked carefully at the other colleges she was applying to, and realized she would be very happy at two other women's colleges in the same area of the country, one of which was a safety for her.
She ended up asking her school counselor to call the adcom to express her interest, and rewrote her essay for the other apps., and sent the rewritten one to W. also with a note telling them they were still her #1 choice.
I would remind your DS that it's not over til it's over, so he needs to buckle down and get out some more apps. along with a nice note to his ED university.
BTW, dd is happy at Wellesley taking finals as I write, but would have also been fine at any of the other colleges where she was accepted. She realized that it's all about attitude, and doing your best, and just letting go after everything is all turned in.
Best of luck.</p>

<p>mom3 - first, your son may just need a little while to regroup. second, UMICH is an amazing school & when it comes to a good engineering school, i'm not sure there are any safeties.</p>

<p>so here's how it looks: he's in a great school, so he IS going to college. he's automatically already applied to an exceptional school RD ;) and may have a better chance of getting in there than regular RD since they know he really wants to go there... to that end i would make sure that is still the case and make sure the school knows. AND now, he has an opportunity to spread his wings a little....</p>

<p>from my experience, teens tend to go crazy after a deferral, sending out way too many new apps or completely shut down. neither is great IMHO as you won't do your best... maybe 2 or 3 more schools, he's done most of the leg work & who knows! remind him that luck the moment when preparation meets opportunity. you've already been given a few new choices... what about Olin College? and UCSD? let us know!</p>

<p>"... when it comes to a good engineering school, i'm not sure there are any safeties"</p>

<p>I'm not sure either, but I would think that a high GPA in a heavy AP curriculum and a 2300 SAT is going to be pretty darned close to a safety at a lot of the top engineering schools that have acceptance rates of 60 to 75 percent. </p>

<p>When I look down the USNews list of to engineering schools, I see plenty that have acceptance rates above 60 percent: Georgia Tech, Purdue, Penn State, Virginia Tech, RPI, NC State, Case Western, and Harvard (just kidding). Many of the top State U's have excellent engineering schools and are probably safeties for in-state students with high stats (e.g. Maryland).</p>

<p>Top engineering schools with lower acceptance rates would be matches or reasonable reaches for high-stats kids with good applications: Carnegie Melon, JHU, Cornell, Northwestern, Rice, Duke, UVA.</p>

<p>MIT, Princeton, Cal Tech, Olin, etc. are probably pretty long reaches for just about everybody.</p>

<p>I just looked at the list for universities with doctoral programs.</p>

<p>I never expected so much response. You are all so kind. I think the passage of time is helping him (he's found out that other kids he knows with as good or better stats have been deferred and they are surviving :)). I think his big concern about Michigan is truly size related-- he thinks he'd not find a niche and get lost in the large residential system. Someone also told him he'd be lucky to clean lab equipment as an undergrad. But I am slowly making the suggestions you've all made, both about the residential programs at Michigan and about the other schools. Thanks again. We know he is very lucky to be in this position -- I think he just wants a comfortable "fit" - thought he'd found it at his ED school and now he is just not excited about trying to find another. Thanks to everyone for some amazing advice. To think I have to go through this two more times! Yuck.</p>

<p>I attended UMich - ChemE and MBA. In reality the size is irrelevant as far as living. When you go to any college the people you interact the most with are those in the hall of your dorm, those in your academic program and those in any social organizations/clubs you join. My UofM friends that I still keep in touch with are freshman year dorm firends and sorority sisters (but more of the dorm friends - something about coming together that first year). Where size does come into play is in the large classes freshman/sophomore year - those huge chemistry lectures with all the pre med students trying to get noticed and all the Chem E's worrying more about their other classes. That was a negative for my d when she visited. Her program of choice is nursing though with much smaller and more focused classes. Still waiting to hear from UMich and deferred w EA at Georgetown. Even safety PSU hasn't responded yet so tell your son that he's in a good place right now.</p>

<p>For my son I thought there were definite safeties given the statistics at our school. The records of those previously accepted at RPI made it pretty clear that he would be accepted unless something went seriously wrong. (i.e. someone wrote a horrible recommendation). I'd guess the OP son's would also be a sure bet at RPI. Their applicant pool is very self selected, but because so many kids who apply are hoping for MIT, Caltech and the like they have to accept 75% of the applicants to get the yield they need.</p>