<p>We didn’t really have popular and unpopular in my tiny class of 70ish. I went to my 10th reunion and for the most part, the handful of people who struck me as the most clever and interesting when I met them in 7th grade were still the most clever and interesting (though their conventional “success” today is all over the map). I was a miserable wallflower as the 7th grade new kid, but those special people who can cut through layers of crap with one pointed insight…even I could recognize them. Apparently they are born, not made.</p>
<p>Being popular and successful are pretty subjective terms. I wouldn’t attempt to presume how successful another person is based on what my personal definition of success, and I wouldn’t want one of my peers to label my success based upon theirs.</p>
<p>I am only graduating now but it is interesting to see where people have ended up so far. Most of the “popular kids” I have managed to hear about have not done so hot, and it seems like the earlier in school they hit their prime, the worse they are-- the kids who were really popular in elementary and middle school seem to have not even gone to college. But I am sure the successful ones just make for less interesting gossip, I am sure there were many. The skills that make people popular tend to be valuable in the work world, too.</p>
<p>My H was popular, handsome, short and smart in his H.S. before going to college and seminary. When I accompanied him to his 20th h.s. reunion, he proudly showed off wallet photos of his (then) 2-year-old to the other very popular, tall, handsome not-as smart guy who’d worked since then as a steeplejack, who also was showing off photos of his 2-year-old.</p>
<p>Here;s the difference: my H’s photos were of his son; the other fellow’s photos were of a grandson. They were both delighted to see each other, and both photos of kids were adorable.</p>
<p>My 30th class reunion was a couple of years ago and we have a website where people have profiles with pictures and little blurbs about their lives. From my observation, the really smart nerdy crowd (my crowd) is doing well with good jobs in nerdy professions, the smart, well-liked popular kids are doing very well in business-oriented jobs, the really sweet girls are all school teachers and housewives, mostly married to successful men, and the burnout crowd has either turned themselves around and are somewhat successful or they have died from car accidents or liver failure. I did not go to the reunion due to vacation plans so this is all generalizations from the website. I came out of a very affluent and hard-partying high school and from the pictures of the reunion on the website, they are still partying hard at the age of almost 50. It looks to me (not to be a mean girl) that the “mean girl” crowd is looking a little puffy from the effects of alcohol and too much sun. The girl that was mean to me just lost her husband this year in a motorcycle accident so I’m not going to be mean to her.</p>
<p>I’ve attended grade school, high school, and college reunions and find the college get togethers most meaningful. We developed deeper relationships by living in dorms, sharing the academic pressures, and reinventing our persona in a setting distinct from our home environments. I still feel very close to my college buddies, even if I only see them in real life every 10 years or so.</p>
<p>I’m watching my daughter as her 10th high school reunion approaches - will she attend? Doubtful - she’s now a different person with a life unrelated to her high school years.</p>
<p>I wonder about some of the very bright women in my high school class - the ones who didn’t finish college, instead got married, had kids, etc. They should have done outstanding things…do they have regrets?</p>
<p>I am actually surprised by some of the people in the so called popular crowd. Some of them went to Ivy League schools but that is as far as they got in terms of accomplishing anything. I always thought they would go onto bigger and better things but they lead very ordinary lives. Nothing wrong with that. But it is just odd. </p>
<p>There is one guy in my glass who was the poor kid, very bright though. Ended up going to a state school and he start two very successful ventures and is now worth more than anyone in our class. And he deserves it.</p>
<p>True that after 20 or 30 years HS doesn’t matter! People change, often for the better, and being pretty in HS doesn’t mean squat–especially when you’re older, wrinkled, and still not a nice person!</p>
<p>But smarts tend to last. Niceness lasts. People smarts are useful. Talents can be developed. </p>
<p>Now what about college standouts? In my graduate school class of about 6 majors, 5 of them were talented or ambitious enough to make a living, some locally, some working on Broadway or as opera accompanists/coaches…but I was the only one to get married and have a family. I wouldn’t trade my “success” story for theirs!</p>
<p>I suppose the same can be said for HS. A successful homemaker or a successful lawyer, to each his/her own. You just can’t always predict outcomes.</p>
<p>beltrami–to add to my post & comment on yours–The women who didn’t do “outstanding things” are probably proud of their children–outstanding or not.</p>
<p>Weird how people in high school now (like me) will know exactly what happened to our classmates 20 years from now because of social networking…</p>
<p>Wow, I read every post on this thread and this all sounds so interesting
I’m a senior now who recently applied to all my colleges, but hearing all these stories makes me excited for my HS reunion. I’d have to wait a while, but I’m sure with Facebook it won’t be difficult for me to see what everyone’s up to 10 years from now…</p>
<p>From what I heard, the top student in our class went to a top ivy, married a clergyman and raised babies. The most popular, most likely to succeed student (pretty, cheerful, friendly, athletic and top grades), went off to a top ivy and earned a lot of $ in high finance but suffered through the crash. Someone just told me this weekend that she is now a bitter woman who never married and isn’t happy about the way her life turned out. </p>
<p>I transferred high schools and the top student at my first high school (also female) became a lawyer but quit to raise babies and support her dh’s career (also a lawyer). Then he went through a mid-life crisis, stopped lawyering and they’re divorced. The most popular student went to a solid, not top college, and ended up becoming a psychologist; she is also divorced. </p>
<p>Somehow, looking back on it, success didn’t seem to depend on what college they went to straight out of high school but rather on what careers they chose and how their personal lives turned out.</p>
<p>By the way, of the 2 most popular kids in my middle school, one became a blue collar worker and the other a musician. They both still live in my hometown and both are married.</p>
<p>The comment about “smart and popular” was right on - they could use the popularity to give them a step up, and the smarts to succeed. The other populars were what I call “locally successful,” which means real estate agents and insurance salesmen - the ones who join the Rotary and Kiwanis Clubs.</p>
<p>But back in the days before breast-jobs on teen girls, the ones who were well-endowed in high school (and a good percentage of the popular girls back then were) became very fat in later life :eek: … almost like that was a pre-indicator of later weight gain. Not a scientific example, but speculation.
:D</p>
<p>Hey digmedia, some of us flat girls got fat too!</p>
<p>(Without reading the other replies yet)</p>
<p>I’m in my mid-40’s so I got out of high school in 1982 which is 29 years ago. The high school I went to was big and in an affluent suburb. </p>
<p>Some of the cool kids and jocks and book worms stayed and some left. I haven’t kept up with most so I can’t say how they all turned out. I’ve heard from a few, or seen a few, on Facebook, the great connector to people you never thought you’d see or hear from again and my general impression is that most folks turned out a little less than what they might have hoped for and that happiness is more of an attitude than anything else. </p>
<p>You choose to be happy. </p>
<p>You are happy because you don’t let little things bother you. </p>
<p>Like envy or jealousy. </p>
<p>My general impression is that the folks that were happy in high school, either due to being “cool” or because they had good self-esteem based upon religion or solid parents who made them feel good no matter what others said … are the folks that are still happy now. </p>
<p>The folks that were constantly running like rats on a wheel to be better, stronger, faster, etc. are the folks that appear to have had life run them over. </p>
<p>I also believe that if you have a good job that doesn’t drive you nuts, a good or great relationship and decent health you are at least a “B” in life. I tell my kids you get those things by making good decisions and by having a plan and sticking to it good times or bad. </p>
<p>I can’t say for sure who is happy or successful or not. But it looks to me like most folks partied too hard (the beer drinking crowd) and have truely burned out, the jocks for the most part ending up in menial jobs because they didn’t plan ahead and thought because they were so cute and special the world would provide for them (EEEEEKKK wrong answer), the smart kids mostly found some peaceful place and the nerds, for the most part, seem to have either disappeared or made something of themselves. </p>
<p>I’m not sure anyone is super famous or rich or anything that I can see. Some, not all, but quite a few of the girls that were seriously hot, seem to be really messed up now in an almost sad pathetic way such as posting wayyyyy old pics that aren’t fooling anyone. Really trying to hang on to their looks, I guess.</p>
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<p>Much sooner than that! For many, it stops mattering as soon as you walk into college orientation. </p>
<p>I had no contact with my HS until somehow they found me for 30th reunion. I was surprised to see the ‘It’ girl in the class had married a so-so guy from our class and was a housewife living locally. I don’t even remember who the popular guy was :D.</p>
<p>Many top students are professors with relatively few professionals. Don’t remember a single lawyer there. Small town with large famous university and many kids were children of professors so not that surprising.</p>
<p>I find this an interesting thread. I went to a NYC school so there were 4600 in my school, 1100 in my graduating class. Too many groups to determine “popular” kids although jocks were pretty well defined by our winning football team. I do know that 2 of our best football players now live in a suburb and are firemen up there; suits them perfectly imho. We do have one of the wealthiest people in America as a graduate one year ahead of me, I met him coincidentally, didn’t know it until he said something during a speech. One friend from Junior High more than High School has “made it” as a comedian. Others with whom I’m in contact with via Facebook are attorneys, corporate types, small business owners, doctors of all kinds. An old boyfriend dropped out of high school, went back for his GED, became a state corrections officer (you know what they say - criminal or cop), had a heart attack at an early age, married three times (twice to the same woman), is now retired in Florida. Glad I moved on from him when I was 17!</p>
<p>There are a few from my high school who live in my current neighborhood which is always surprising. One’s a lawyer, one a not-so-successful actor, one a mom. </p>
<p>Interesting post but I have to agree, and this is what I kept telling my now college sophomore, high school is fun but insignificant in the scheme of most lives!</p>
<p>The OP implies that burnout and popular are not the same. At my high school they were not exclusive… and one of the most popular boys who was also a heavy pot smoker is now a judge in my hometown. I always find it entertaining when I see his name in the local paper or on a billboard when I go back to visit.</p>
<p>The smart kids mostly did well. Attorneys, high powered consultants, college profs, journalists, accountants, one is a colonel in the army. My (now I know) loser boyfriend is a nurse in my hometown. Come to think of it, except for the judge, the ones who did well are the ones who got out. Unemployment in my hometown runs something around 15% these days, so no surprise.</p>
<p>Remember the tv show “What Really Happened to the Class of '65?” It was based on a book, and it followed graduates of a 1965 class of a large California hs years later to show what happened to them. I loved it I guess this is our own version here on CC.</p>
<p>
Such a sad song…</p>
<p>I went to my 49th/50th reunion, we had it with the class ahead of us, last November. There were a bunch of old people there. What was that about? </p>
<p>In my mind everyone is still 17.</p>