<p>Did they play sports (which ones?) and participate in academic clubs? Is that even a possibility nowadays?</p>
<p>I ask because I visit one site and from the looks of it kids have one of two options which effects their career path:</p>
<ol>
<li>A dumb jock in high school, great looking, majored in communications in college and now works in sales</li>
</ol>
<p>or</p>
<ol>
<li>You were a social misfit, introverted nerd that didn't like sports, majored in math in college, and are now are an adult misfit that can communicate and would rather be left alone working in a basement crunching numbers.</li>
</ol>
<p>For all of those two cases they probably make up about a half percent of actual instances. When I was in high school 90% of the kids were a mix of 1 & 2....same as now as an adult.</p>
<p>So the question is were your kids well rounded in high school? Were they a mix of 1 and 2? Or am I completely off my rocker and kids fit one of the two categories to the T nowadays?</p>
<p>My daughter played a sport 3 of 4 years, but wasn’t a star in it - just did it for fun and exercise. My son never played a sport at all, just biked on his own for fun. Both of them had more of a focus on EC’s that were outside the school than inside the school. Both are at top 20 universities. I think you are drawing black and white stereotypes of dumb jocks and misfit grinds rather than dealing in reality, which is that most successful people are a combination of smarts and social skills.</p>
<p>Kid #1 played in the orchestra as a freshman and thought about joining a few other things but never got around to it. Halfway through the year, he got a paying job shelving books at the local library. Later on in high school, after he turned 16, he got a better job in a party store. He never played a sport or joined a club, and he even ditched the orchestra after 9th grade, so except for the jobs (he worked continuously from mid-9th grade on), he had no ECs. Our flagship state university did not mind.</p>
<p>Kid #2 was a band geek. Symphonic band, marching band, a local youth orchestra’s wind ensemble, district and state solo festivals, All-County and All-State Honors Bands, and years and years of private lessons. She was nominated for All-Eastern (the next step up from All-State) but did not get in. She made a modest effort to do a few other things – including working with some other kids to form a new club at school, playing in a recreational-level community soccer league for two years, and doing various forms of volunteer work in the summers – but basically, she was a band geek. Period. She got into a top 20 school (and played in one of their wind ensembles for four years).</p>
<p>Could they have done better in terms of college admissions if they had more spectacular or varied ECs? For Kid 1, probably not. He was state university material, and state universities tend not to care much about ECs. For Kid 2, perhaps. She was at the level where ECs do make a difference. But she preferred things the way they were, and there’s a limit to how much you can do on top of an IB diploma program and retain your sanity. And she was happy with where she went to college.</p>
<p>DS did academic clubs, theater, community service, student government. He didn’t really do sports, as theater always interfered. He also spent a lot of time hanging out with friends and was even teh Homecoming King, so I wouldnt’ describe him as introverted or even a cool nerd. he applied to schools known for good aid and has been accepted with excellent packages to all of them (waiting on only one reach). He likes to consider himself a Renaissance man.</p>
<p>D1 did belong to group 1). Her circle of friends were more student government type, lacrosse, soccer, field hockey players, and most of them were top 10% students. D1 played lacrosse & tennis until they weren´t compatible to ballet (not good for her ankles). D2 did track and then had to drop it for ballet. They weren´t THE popular crowd, but they were invited to parties. </p>
<p>In college, D1 was a math major at a top tier school. She was very active in her sorority and also student government. I think it helps that both of our girls are quite attractive. When D1 was a freshman, many guys in her math class assumed she walked into a wrong class (she´s so stupid, she didn´t even know she was in the wrong class).</p>
<p>Our kids went to private schools where it was not looked down upon to be smart and get good grades - good looking kids, jocks all worked hard to excell academically.</p>
<p>S1: Student Government, theatre, chorale and vocal ensemble, math club/competitions, boy scouts, church choir, community service, school newspaper, web designer, pt job</p>
<p>S2: Varsity lax captain, Pres. student council, VP state association of student councils, NHS, Mock Trial, math club/competitions, altar server</p>
<p>Both did what they liked (S2 did originally get involved with StuCo because his older brother was involved, but he eventually made it his own). ECs mattered not a bit for S1’s admission to an engineering school. We believe that S2’s athletic and leadership ECs did factor into his admissions and merit scholarships.</p>
<p>Kid #1: No sports, but serious ballet until mid-10th grade, then took up tap (but much less seriously). Always involved in literary journals, and writing on her own. Had a 'zine she did with two friends in 11th-12th grades – quite funny and got decent distribution on some of their issues. Ran her school’s Women’s Day programming. Worked for a florist/retailer 10-12 hours/week.</p>
<p>Kid #2: Wrestling (with little talent) 9th and half of 10th grades. Tap dance 5th-12th grades, with increasing seriousness (although never more than a couple classes per week, plus some performances and workshops). Drama club 10th-12th, acted in productions in 10th and 11th, directed in 12th, treasurer 11th and president 12th. Academic decathalon team 10-12, captain 11-12. One of three student reps appointed to a district-wide task force on reimagining 12th grade. Volunteered 4 hours/week at a paleontology lab, also a bunch of one-off charity projects. Worked 10+ hours/week at a gourmet cheese shop. Honorary vice president of the Anime/Manga Club (everyone in the club knew he loved manga and talked about/shared them with him, but he never had time to go to meetings). He was a busy, busy kid.</p>
<p>In college, Kid #2 continued with theater, but went entirely over to the tech/administrative side except for a few dance performances his first year. Almost all of his paid employment in college was theater-related, and he still moonlights in theater post-graduation. He also took up fencing and got good enough to win intercollegiate club bouts on a regular basis, and was armorer and then social director of his fencing club. None of his other high school ECs carried through much, except he remains a terrible snob about cheeses, and his interest in secondary education curriculum design is relevant to his current job.</p>
<p>My 3 spent most EC time with theater and some film, much of it outside of school. Their leadership developed more through regional-level religious youth movements than in school clubs. The older 2 attended very troubled, crime-rattled poverty high schools so sought to escape after school in EC’s elsewhere. We moved in time for the youngest to enjoy a suburban public school with a friendly after-school environment, so he did more with clubs there (Philosophy) and took roles in the school plays. </p>
<p>I wish all 3 of mine could have done <em>some</em> h.s. team sports, but the unbending attitudes re: scheduling by most coaches was discouraging, and each gave up on that. Each one had a poignant moment when they had to decide directions. </p>
<ul>
<li><p>S-1 had to choose between summer training for the h.s. soccer team and being in a film, which ironically had a soccer scene. Today he’s a working actor in NYC, but always ready to play frisbee in Central Park between rehearsals. He was great in QuizBowl during h.s., and recently did the national tryout by computer for Jeopardy (we’ll see…).</p></li>
<li><p>S-2 also gave up on organized sports just before h.s. In the rural town, he genuinely enjoyed AYSO community soccer games. When we moved to the suburb, he attended the soccer team’s tryout but found he couldn’t even complete their track run warmup. He was stunned at how competitive they all were, with summer soccer camps and h.s. expectations of great wins and trophies. He walked away from the tryout and did theater and film for the rest of h.s. He’s now living in LA, writing screenplays/doing dayjobs and working out on his own schedule. He has outstanding social skill that gets him through many life transitions; I’m often in awe of it. </p></li>
</ul>
<p>D is so tiny in stature, she could really only be a jockey, ballerina or gymnast. She did some jazz dance, but then discovered theater, more her speed. While in college, she added circus performing skills including stilting that got her high above the crowd. I have one funny memory of her at age 7, during her first and only season in Little League. Instead of running on to third base, she stopped to chat with the shortstop: “Nice shoes! Where’d you get those shoes?” End of a baseball career, ah well.</p>
<p>S1 ran Cross Country for 3 years and played club rugby all four years. In junior high he competed in math competitions but didn’t do any of that in high school. He’s now a sophomore engineering student still plays rugby and has joined a fraternity. He loves school both academically and socially.</p>
<p>S2 plays club rugby mainly because his dad is a coach, I don’t see him continuing on after high school. Other than that he goes to school. He’s a strong writer but math and science really throw him for a loop. He’s a HS junior now so we’ll see where he ends up he’s so far not too interested in planning.</p>
<p>S1 was a varsity runner all twelve seasons in high school. Teachers told me they loved having cross country runners in their classes, because the kids were usually good students who tried hard. DS was accepted at schools like Amherst and Wash. U. He won the school’s only scholarship for strong performance in math and science. One of his teammates is at Bates and another is at Columbia. His public high school’s participation rate in sports is astoundingly high - at least 80%. It’s just accepted that kids there will strive hard in academics AND athletics. Your generalization would have been correct for my high school back in the late 70s, even though it was one of the better schools in Texas. Times have changed, I think!</p>
<p>My older son is a computer nerd - graduated in the top 1% of his class. In high school he only had a couple of close friends and was on Academic Team, Science Olympiad and did no sports. At Carnegie Mellon he had lost of friends, did nerdy ECs (board and video games mostly), his only exercise was living ten minutes off campus. He now has a fabulous job, and doesn’t do much more for exercise though he went skiing with the office last week. He’s happy, anything wrong with that? </p>
<p>Younger son had lots of friends in high school, graduated in top 6% of his class, did orchestra, Literary Magazine and Sci Olympiad at school. No sports. He’s now in college and his main EC activities are related to his International Relations, but he’s taking a martial arts class off campus. I think he’s pretty well-rounded.</p>
<p>My three are all very different but not one of them was one dimensional in the sense that you could easily define them with a word like job or geek or hippie. They all are athletic, but don’t all play the same sport and their interests outside of the sports they participate are very different. They all play video games from time to time but none play every day or even every week. I’d say in general they cluster more toward the middle than to any extreme.</p>
<p>S1 played guitar, with lessons, starting in middle school. Played in HS jazz band three years. Played in pit band of HS musical one year when a guitarist was needed. Began playing in a in a rock/indi band in MS, which he is still a member of as a junior in college. Played HS soccer three years, HS lacrosse four years, and club lacrosse for a couple of summers. Worked 10-15 hours a week at a coffee shop junior and senior year of HS. Took a few AP classes, lots of honors classes, was in national honor society.Has had a part time job in college soph and jr years. Plays club lacrosse in college, and is in a fraternity. Applied to and was accepted at five colleges, ranging from small LAC to major research university.</p>
<p>S2 played clarinet and sax, with lessons for both starting in elem. school, throughout HS. As involved with every aspect of band and music as was humanly possible. Band, jazz band, marching band,all state band. Was drum major for three years, won highest award for music in HS, won award for jazz improv. at a national competition. Continues to play both instruments plus guitar in college, though not majoring in music. Ran varsity cross country all four years of HS. Played HS lacrosse for two years, then switched to indoor and outdoor track for the last two years of HS. Ran and placed as a top runner at the state level in XC and track every season. Is continuing to run at the club level in college. Started college with 22 (I think) credits from AP classes. National merit commended, natl., honor soc., state honors for scholarship. Applied to eleven colleges, all top twenty universities and a couple of Ivys. Accepted at seven, rejected from two Ivys and Stanford, and wait listed at Rice.</p>
<p>D is presently a freshman in high school. Playing three sports, heavily involved in band, jazz band, and marching band.</p>
<p>None are what could be remotely called nerds, though their grades are great. They like their social lives way too much.</p>
<p>Kid #1 - USAGymanstics, level 8 AA regional medalist. Left due to injury at the end of 9th grade. Spent the next 3 years on the high school’s varsity diving team. 4 years in band. 4 years in choir, last two in the audition only chior, currently sings in college (had lead in the chamber opera there as a frosh-yes, the kid has a voice). NHS, 2 part-times jobs at dance/gymnastics studios during the school year, lifeguard over the summer, volunteer accompanist at church, 3 years dance team, 3 years color guard. So, sports, music, dance, volunteer gig, and jobs. Graduated top 5% in her class. Neither stereotype fits. </p>
<p>Kid #2 - Still in hs, so the story’s not over. Percussion, Jazz Band, track, softball, cheerleading, part-time job, fencing club, volunteer accomapanist at church, Bible school/Sunday school teacher. Favorite subject is Math. Likely to be a top 5% grad like sis. Once again, neither stereotype applies.</p>
<p>The majority of the jocks in our school are far from dumb. The average GPA on D’s team is 3.89 (4.0). S’s team the average GPA for the starters is 4.0 and a 3.9 for the rest of the squad. Most of these kids are going on to top colleges around the country. They are also very involved in the music program (band or choir). Something like 80% of the kids in our school are involved in performing arts. Our kids are in this group. Our kids are also involved in a few clubs and active at our church like most of the other kids that fit into this group.</p>
<p>The social misfits are the “dumb jocks”, those that will be sitting in the bar for the rest of their lives reliving that one great play they made in high school. It’s not cool to not be a good student.</p>
<p>There is also a small percentage of vocational kids that spend their time in the auto shop or wood shop</p>
<p>Safe to assume 99% of kids are in between the two extremes you list.</p>
<p>My S plays music very seriously for school and for fun, did a sport for a couple of years and has decent grades.</p>
<p>My D plays music but doesn’t put a ton of effort into it, works hard to be good at 2 sports year round, has excellent grades and does a little academic stuff outside of school.</p>
<p>There certainly are some grains of truth in some stereotypes, but today’s culture evens those out a bit, I think. Lots of boys are gamers, not just nerds, but jocks as well, pop culture has made it more okay to be a band/choir kid, etc. </p>
<p>DD is a great student, though not super intellectual, and I DO think that is affected by the fact that her EC, dance team, of which she’s captain, is more important to her than her academics. But it results in a smart kid who is fit, accomplished, and a great leader. Most worrisome to be honest is the fact that she’s considered “super hot”, according to her brother’s soph and junior friends. I admit I’m proud to have a gorgeous kid, but now that she’s getting ready to leave home-- oh no!</p>
<p>DS is very different, good student but claims to hate school, funny but quieter, not as socially savvy. If one could major in XBox he’d be a Nobel Prize winner. Alas… We’re so not sure where he’s going to end up!</p>
<p>Introverted, gifted son did academic ECs, Orchestra and was (is) a runner- CC/track in HS. Competed at State level in music and sports (CC team had over 60 boys and 60 girls- over 5% of the student body). Big time reader, lots of computer time/games as well. Well rounded and well read on many fronts- thank the internet. Grades never perfect, some test scores were. Cross Country and Orchestra/other music students tended to be in the top tier- often conflicts with after school events.</p>