Disabled student--should I even go to college

I received multiple concussions last year and I still haven’t recovered. As of right now I don’t think I could possibly handle college, even sans the academics, socializing, cleaning, in general just surviving in that environment seems like too much for me. I’m registered with the disabled students program, and as a freshman I am only taking 12 units, but I can’t say I’m expecting to succeed academically. I guess what I’m asking is, what are my options? Do you think DSPS can help me? Should I take the fall quarter off to recover? I’ve looked into that but I’m confused as to how to do it, will I be accepted applying for readmission, will it make sense financially, etc. I’m so lost.

The last year has been quite miserable and I was really looking forward to college. I’ve become distant with all of my friends, no longer able to do any of the things I enjoy, I’m extremely depressed and quite frankly surprised I was even accepted to UCSB given how messed up my brain was while I was applying. I feel there is nothing for me in my hometown and I want the leave the place I have spent being so depressed for the last year, so if I have to skip fall quarter I would be very upset. My parents believe I am well enough to attend college even though I definitely am not. I feel excited for the academic rigor, the beautiful environment, the new friends, and I am not at all sad about leaving my current life, so the transition to college would be a breeze if it weren’t for the whole brain trauma thing. At this point I’m kind of just debating whether I will be more depressed at college or staying home, because both seem like really awful options. Making supportive friends in college sounds hard given that I can’t go out much, but I don’t really have any friends here for me in my home town either.

Sorry for the long post. I really just have no idea what to do and I feel so hopeless.

This sounds tough @theveggie.

Sorry you are going through this experience. I would be curious to know what caused the concussions to ascertain the likelihood of a full recovery so quickly. Why have you become distanced from your friends? In any case is there a trusted adult around that you could talk with? A guidance counselor, coach, friend’s parent, etc or a professional counselor or therapist?

Starting college is tough enough for freshman without all the challenges you are facing. Congratulations on getting into UC Santa Barbara that is a dream school for a great many. You said you are “definitely not” ready to go to college. Is that because of the academics? Why do your parents think you are ready? You should try to see if you can push back to spring quarter or take a year off if you are not ready for move in, school, building relationships, cleaning, going out etc. Call up Disabled Student Programs and talk with someone there about how you could go about postponing your attendance. They no doubt have faced this question before. After obtaining more information you will be able to weigh your decision. Don’t let the depression go unchecked if you do stay home. Make sure to see a counselor and reach out to some people. HTH

Be sure if you end up taking some kind of medical withdrawal that you check on housing and do any paperwork they need, too.

This is tough, but you can get through it. If you do decide to go, DSPS can definitely help you, but I agree that having a good therapist in Santa Barbara would be wise. Ideally you would be working with a brain injury specialist. I’ve worked with my students who have serious concussions and brain injuries–often military veterans with TBI. It is amazing to see how much people with brain injury can recover. Is it frustrating? Yes, incredibly. I can’t believe how emotionally tough some of these students are who keep plugging away even when they feel stupid and frustrated that they can’t do things they used to do. But they do often recover. The neurons do reconnect. I would suggest you get a smartpen and learn to use it before you go, if you still have time. Also, please, please, please don’t drink or use pot when you get to college–it sets your healing back a lot. I would suggest you contact DSPS now, ahead of your arrival. At the very least, you can get an early appointment. Ideally, you could go over there before the semester starts so that you talk to them about your situation. Also, talk to your professors–even email them each privately before classes start–to let them know about your situation. Profs are a lot more educated about these sorts of things now than we used to be, but it wouldn’t hurt to add a link to website that might provide them more information–perhaps something your doctor recommended to you. I also think there’s nothing wrong with taking a semester off, and DSPS will help you figure out how to do that if that’s what you decide. Good luck. I wish you well!