Divorce

You’re going to have a lot of time to get terrific grades and to write great essays for your college apps. But if you’re this concerned as a sophomore, it might be worth talking to a counselor or therapist so you can get the divorce, as well as your B+, into perspective. Good luck.

It won’t help you to talk about it for “top schools”. They aren’t going to see it as a reason to admit you if they didn’t already plan to.

But it’s a regular class, not an honors/AP class

It still doesn’t matter. You have received very sound advice… it is up to you to take it or leave it.

I’ve also experienced 3 deaths in a span of 1 month and one of them was from my grandfather, who was very passionate about plants as I was. Should I discuss ab these three deaths or make it more on my grandfather

Sorry you’re having a tough time.
Here’s what you need to do:
Stop in and speak with your school counselor. Ask him or her about support resources. (They might know about support groups in the community, or therapists who have worked with other students, or whatever.)

This serves two purposes:

  1. You might actually get some valuable support.
  2. When you’re doing college apps two years from now, your counselor will be able to comment knowledgeable on the dip in grades, if there’s even enough of a dip to worry about. The counselor rec is the place for this to be addressed - much better than you talking about it yourself. And the counselor’s remarks will be much more genuine if they were in the loop AT THE TIME, rather than having you, two years later, asking them, “Hey, could’ja maybe tell the colleges that I was sad about my parents divorce two years ago when I got that B+?” It will just sound like an excuse if you bring it up then. But if you seek support NOW, your counselor will have something good to say even if the grade-blip is negligible. They’ll be able to say, “This student faced some challenges in their family, sophomore year, but they were proactive about seeking support and kept it from derailing their grades.” And that will impress colleges far more than a bland recommendation on a student who never got a B+.

Parental divorce tends to make them poorer (on a combined basis) and less able to pay for your college. Also, many “top colleges” require both to cooperate for financial aid. If the divorce is hostile, they may be unwilling to cooperate, preventing you from getting financial aid at those colleges.

http://talk.qa.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/2083835-faq-divorced-parents-financial-aid-and-net-price-calculators.html

@aquapt I talked to my student assistance counselor a lot last year during my parent’s separation and I am going to reach back to her about these deaths that occurred. It was hard for me bc of all of this, but I want to prob take SAT 2 US History, and maybe some dual enrollment classes during the summer at my local community college or attend a college summer program.

Happy Holidays to all of u guys. I was thinking about taking some sociology college course and some other history course at a community college, while also trying to study for the SAT 2 US History. I understand there is nothing I can do about my USH I grade, but I feel I should take some college courses to show I still like history and that there was a toll in my mental health 10th grade, where I talked to the Student Assistance Counselor and with a good recommendation from my counselor not only about my schedule mess up, achievements, class work, and course rigor, but also about my divorce that affected me. I know the grade will still be there, but I want to show colleges I can do the work. What do u guys think about my plan?

So way down the road perhaps. But don’t borrow worry from tomorrow and ruin today. A B+ is a great grade btw.

In a podcast featuring admissions officers from Dartmouth and Penn an interesting idea was mentioned. They suggested a student keep a weekly personal journal. About your successes, issues and feelings about classes etc.

When college planning comes along you will have great experience thinking about your goals and experiences. It will help form your personal statement and inform your decisions. It also helps you practice thinking and writing about yourself.

It might be a good thing for you and to get your feelings out. I’m sure they will evolve over time.

Happy new year and keep your chin up. Divorce is tough but it’s not a reflection on you or your parent’s love for you.

What do you guys think ab my plan, along with my guidance counselor explaining the situation in the recommendation?

Is your guidance counselor already writing your rec?

A B+ will not ruin your chances anywhere.

I don’t think you are listening to the advice posters are giving you.

One B+, one semester in high school will not be the reason you are accepted or rejected from colleges. If you like history, great take some additional history classes but do not do it in an attempt to “prove” you are an A student in history. It doesn’t matter, at all.

And to repeat, many, many kids go through divorce and death unfortunelty, do not use it as an excuse for “poor grades”.

Pursue your passions and do them with depth and meaning. Grades are just one of many factors in the admissions process. You are way overthinking this one B.

Good luck to you.

It was a final grade in a regular class and everyone is different emotionally when it comes to death and divorce.

The point is showcase was is great about yourself and don’t make excuses. I can guarantee you that many, many kids have hardships. The adcoms that I have talked to don’t really want to hear excuses, they want to know how YOU will contribute to their college and institutional needs. Show your strengths to them, not weaknesses.

Don’t worry about one B+ grade due to parental divorce. The real worry is the financial aid implications that may significantly limit which “top colleges” will be affordable. See reply #26.

I’m sorry you’ve faced so many challenges. Talking to a counselor may help, so I think that’s a great idea. But if you use essays to try to explain why you got one B+, readers may be left to wonder how you were able to get A’s in all your other classes. You have a long time before applications. Your energy is better spent focusing on what you’re doing now.

You’re talking about the summer?

Honestly, I think you’re wound up way too tight about this. A B+ isn’t going to keep you out of college, and burning yourself out with summer classes plus test prep isn’t going to get you into a whole different level of school than you could otherwise get into.

1 best idea is, work with a counselor/therapist. The vibe/concern that I get when reading your posts is that you're channeling all of your grief and anxiety into premature worry about college admissions... as if you can make everything right with the world by bringing a fantasy of getting into The Best College to fruition. The problem is that there's no college you can go to that will magically fix everything from the previous 18 years of life, so this way of managing your emotions is guaranteed to backfire later, whether it happens when the college decisions disappoint, or when the Dream College itself disappoints. (Because when you get there, you'll still be you and all the same baggage will still be with you.) I speak from experience on this; deal with the real issues now, so you don't have to spend college-and-beyond dealing with it when it catches up with you.

2 best idea is: imagine that you magically knew that you already had a guaranteed acceptance to a college you're thrilled about. Armed with that knowledge, what do you want to do this summer? Spend 80% of the time doing that, and 20% doing unfortunate practical things like test prep. (Maybe even 90:10) Seriously, what would recharge your batteries this summer? Getting away to some residential program/camp and making new friends and forgetting all about stuff at home for a while? Immersing yourself in something creative - art or music or theater? It sounds as if you're fortunate enough to have choices and aren't under financial pressure to get a job, so... invest in your health and well-being and growth as a unique human being by doing something healing and nourishing. Your current tunnel vision will tell you that this would be a compromise, but it really isn't, because anything that heals and nourishes you will also help you get in touch with the genuine passions that will come across in your college applications. Use this summer to get out of the trap of second-guessing what somebody else wants to see. No community college class on your transcript is better than the qualities and skills of self-knowledge, self-actualization, and self-care.

@domt73 parent opinion here. You have nothing to explain. Getting one B+ or even a C isn’t the end of the world.

This just is worth one more minute of worry on your part. Even if it’s the only not A grade you have when you are applying for colleges in a couple of years, I would still suggest not providing any explanation for a B+ grade.

I’m sorry you are dealing with your parent divorce, but really…your grade of B+ in one class…just put that out of your mind.

Too late to add…

I think your guidance counselor comment about one B+ grade is not going to matter…at all. Better for the school counselor to concentrate their letter on your strengths and other applicable things…explaining away ONE B+ grade is going to look silly.

Your plan to take some additional history courses is not a bad one.

Do keep in mind that this one B+ grade is going to have zero impact on your college admissions so when the time comes, if you do get rejected from any colleges…don’t blame it on one B+ grade.

With regard to explaining…it would be one thing if your whole term marks in every subject were affected…but they weren’t.