Do Faraway College Choices Lead to Long-Term Relocation?

<p>I got all of my education in the Midwest and was single when job hunting- I returned to my home state since I couldn't think of the benefits of being totally alone far away from family. I met Indian H in the city we both ended up in, we're hoping son goes to grad school on either coast to give us an excuse to retire within hundreds of miles of him, otherwise moving somewhere without our winters is a priority. Never spent much time with my instate sibs over the years, mother died years before I met H, no reason to stay for winters or family. Parents had moved from their hometown and likewise a generation more or less removed from them were immigrants, our family doesn't put down roots for generations. If my F had taken that MN job transfer my sibs and I would have gone to different colleges, met different spouses and the following would not be known to me... </p>

<p>Undergrad always single college friends- one from NJ went to grad school out east, spent time working in Midwest, ended up out east. Another from WI ended up instate after schooling in various places. A third from WI ended up on the east coast.</p>

<p>Some relatives in their 20's are where friends are- one chose U of Washington and likes it in that area, having a local girlfriend adds to the reasons to stay after graduation. Upstate NY couldn't keep one- she just went to Minneapolis where boyfriend met at a WI summer job in their field now lives- she is living with several girlfriends.</p>

<p>A Midwest friend's son went to Georgetown, then LA to try his hand at being a comic followed by grad school in London, now living at home and working until something better in his field comes up.</p>

<p>S CA relative went to UC Berkeley, then NY state for grad school and likes having a job in the Bay area- there is a difference in N and S CA culture.</p>

<p>Here's one I just heard about- couple now in WI after final MN education and likely to stay- he's from CA and she's from NC, they met while HS exchange students in Russia!</p>

<p>Well, 30 years ago, I went to off to college eight hours away from home and took a job there (here) after graduation as there were not comparable jobs "back home."</p>

<p>I selfishly hope my kids will return at least reasonably close to home after college so I can enjoy them and hypothetical grandchildren. </p>

<p>The weather is less than wonderful where my DS attends, which may improve the odds of him returning. I joke that I want my DD to attend somewhere up north with bad winters to encourage her to return. Thus, I am encouraging Cleveland and Rochester, rather than Florida or SoCal. :)</p>

<p>One thing I've learned is not to expect only one or two moves from anyone in our family. My FIL grew up in Colorado but got a job in Delaware and that's where they raised their family. My MIL is from PA so living in Del was fairly close to family for her. After their last child was almost done HS, they moved to WV and then moved to Colorado for retirement.</p>

<p>My parents were born in NJ, raised their family in Delaware, after the last child was out of the nest they moved to Virginia for a few years and then retired in NJ.</p>

<p>Of my husband three siblings, none live in either the state where they got their degree or the state where they were born. All of us have moved a few times. From our Delaware beginnings we've collectively lived in PA, NY, VA, WV, TX, AZ and CO. </p>

<p>Just because a recent grad lives in their college town for a year or five, does not mean that's where they are going to live their entire lives. Our family is truly an example of the mobile society.</p>

<p>Not really. I know people who went to colleges in their home state and moved out-of-state after they graduated from college for better job opportunities (and never went back). I went to school out-of-state and I moved back to my home state.</p>

<p>For example, my mother was born and educated in the South. She has lived in Michigan since she graduated from college. She met my father in Michigan and the rest is history.</p>

<p>The kid went to Washington, DC for a Model United Nations simulation in 11th grade, fell in love with the city, and isn't looking back. She wanted to go to school in DC and she is. She has no intentions of ever coming back to Michigan, which is fine because her father and I will be retiring to Las Vegas in a few years. We'll always have sofa bed if she needs one!</p>

<p>It's probably too early to call it, but DD went to school back east and is now doing Teach for America (a 2 year commitment) back in her home city. TFA asks you to rank the cities you prefer to work in and she did list our city as her first choice but was very torn between here and NYC where a lot of her friends from college were headed. So for now she's home, but grad school is probably in her future and she'd like to spend some more time on the East Coast, so she might head back there again. I think she might end up in our home state in the long-run but maybe not in the L.A. region which is becoming increasingly unlivable from a few standpoints. I'm not sure I'd choose to make a life for myself here if I was starting out again.</p>

<p>We measure how far our DS is from home by the number of stops he has to make.</p>

<p>Seattle to Oregon= 1 P break.
Pittsburgh to Oregon= 1 stop. Direct if he's lucky.
Toronto to Ore = 1 stop.
India to Ore = 1 stop
Germany to Ore = 1 stop.</p>

<p>Seattle is only 2-4 hours closer than Pittsburgh but Pittsburgh is 2000miles further.<br>
India was no further than Germany in travel time even though India's distination was another 4000 miles further. </p>

<p>Distance is only relative.</p>

<p>not too much of a move, but i went from NJ to Boston for college. i have every intention on moving back to NJ once i graduate and getting a job in NYC. the only thing that im afraid of that some other people have mentioned is meeting a guy in college and getting into a serious relationship. if he wasnt from the tri-state area, there could be a problem becuase as of now im pretty against relocating my life anywhere else.</p>

<p>My W is also a foreign-military service brat. Ended up in Oregon for grad school. Liked Oregon and decided that I was good enough. We left OR after graduation for the East coast for 5 years but came back for the lifestyle. </p>

<p>Bro left Or to go to Ivy. Met a girl and got a job in NYC (40 years). Comes back to OR once a year to see Mom and vegitate.</p>

<p>I wanna live anywhere but where I am right now...I don't think I could stand it if my parents popped in for a visit every weekend or something.</p>

<p>And yes I do plan to live far away...</p>

<p>D is an NYC person to her heart. </p>

<p>However, when it came time to go to college, she wanted to go anywhere but NYC because; she did not want her whole educational experience to take place on the island of manhattan, and knew that she would be returning to the city after graduation. </p>

<p>Had 4 great years in Hanover, now back in NYC working until she goes off to grad school next year. Who knows where she will be next, but wherever it is, she is definitely planning on returning to NYC when it is over.</p>

<p>My son who is a senior at Lehigh (about a 4 hour drive from home) just accepted a job offer with a company about 1/2 hour outside of Philadelphia. So then he'll be 5 hours or more away from home! I figure he can work there for a few years (and there's talk of a year in London with this job), then come back to New England before any grandchildren arrive--I can hope!</p>

<p>My two nephews went to school in the West Coast, graduated in May 08 and did not come back to Fl. One of them came back for three months and decided to go back in September. They say there is nothing like West Coast way of life.</p>

<p>A friend of my family is originally from Maryland and went to U of Arizona. There he met his future wife who was from Arizona and they ended up moving back to the same town he grew up in.</p>

<p>My D chose a school on the East Coast. Although she loves the school, she is saying she won't live there after college because it is too cold. She has also said people seem so formal there and she misses all the friendly smiles once she leaves the college campus. Although the school is diverse, she misses the diversity in the community here, also. She is just a Freshman, so who knows what will really happen. She also is an active person and the fact that your outdoor activities are curtailed so often by weather has been a hard transition for her. She isn't used to staying inside buildings much and rarely wore shoes, let alone boots, but she does love the school! Don't get me wrong. And, she is having a great adventure going so far away, too. That is worth it. Also, it takes just as long to drive from here to San Francisco as it does for her to fly from East to West coast, so distance as related to time is not that bi a deal. </p>

<p>My middle went about 600 miles away and transferred back here Junior year.</p>

<p>My oldest went 400 miles north to the San Francisco Bay area for college and is staying there so far. She loves it. She graduated in 2006. </p>

<p>I hope my youngest does come home, but there is no way to tell. I think my middle will be staying around here.</p>

<p>My daughter went to school in the Northeast, is now at grad school on the East Coast and her fiance works in Manhattan. The only time she will return to the Midwest is to visit.
I think parents have to be prepared for that possibility...we were.</p>

<p>This issue was a major factor in the creation of the Bright Futures scholarship program in Florida. Many bright kids who could go out of state are kept here by the 100% tuition scholarship. The idea (besides helping kids afford college) was that if they went to school here, they'd stay here, helping the state in the long run.</p>

<p>I know that as a parent, I'd be happy if my kids lived an easy car ride away. All my siblings live in the state, and our kids have been able to grow up knowing their cousins and grandparents very well. It also meant only one out-of-state family branch to have to visit for Christmas, Thanksgiving, etc., so they also feel close to hubby's family. But that's because we have always made visiting family a priority. Hopefully that has rubbed off, and they'll come to visit once in a while (we're keeping the house that's close to the beach and a day-trip drive to Disney in that hope :-) )</p>

<p>I want my kids to be where they are happy and productive. Maybe going to college in-state gives them the opportunity to look around here first.</p>

<p>PS DH went to college less than an hour from home. He now lives 1000 miles away. I went to college in my hometown and now live two hours away from my parents.... So there are clearly no hard-and-fast rules.</p>

<p>I can't tell you if I'll continue to live in the same city where my school is, but I can assure you and myself that I'm not going to be settling back in Philadelphia anytime soon.</p>

<p>My son who went to Florida from Texas met a beautiful, bright, wonderful Florida girl (only child) and is staying there...</p>

<p>They're getting married in June and putting down roots there. </p>

<p>I knew it could happen, but am bummed just the same. Oh well, I have 2 other sons who both want to stay in Texas, so 2 out of 3 isn't bad!</p>

<p>My mom is convinced that I'll never return to SoCal. </p>

<p>I somewhat agree...if I get a job here, I would be happy to stay here. It's just so darned expensive to live up here (not that SoCal is that much better).</p>