<p>gourmet, I agree. I’m saying that even in a situation where my dh knows these students and their parents well, he still wouldn’t put himself in that situation. Unfortunately, he’s taught kids with real emotional issues and had to report to authorities disturbing stuff. While I’d love to believe every interviewer is professional and every applicant is stable, I know that’s not the case. A public place protects both parties.</p>
<p>ETA: Just to clarify, I don’t think it’s wrong for interviewers to have kids to their homes, but they should make clear UP FRONT that someone else will be home and/or that the parent is welcome to wait in another room for them. Again, for THEIR protection as much as the kid’s.</p>
<p>When I was younger, single, and a full-time dj, and had mobile sound systems, I sometimes interviewed prospective trainees. Sometimes female. Given the nature of my business, and when/how/where most dj money is earned, the easiest time for me to interview was at 3 in the morning in my home. That was when I got home from work.
I chose to do interviews around 6 or 7 in the evening before my work. It wasn’t as handy for me, but it was what I felt appropriate for me and for the interviewee.</p>
<p>I am hopong JHS will address my concern(para 1) from my post 87</p>
<p>I don’t see what difference that makes. If someone wants to try something (such as NSM’s professor who made a pass at her), he’ll do so regardless of whether there is a preexisting relationship or not. If anything – there’s MORE risk, if he knows the cute girl is coming in. What, do you think these interviewers prepare for girls they think are cute or something? Extra cologne? Lights dim? Champagne chilling?</p>
<p>It seems obvious that most of us enter this conversation with our minds made up. If it were my daughters, I’d give them the “use common sense” talk, and then take them to the alum’s house.</p>
<p>Like Fauve said, I think this is the time for rational common sense and trust to kick in. I think we all agree that anything untoward is extremely unlikely to happen. How about this in comparison? I’ll guarantee you that at EVERY social event your daughter attends the first few months of school, she will be looked upon as an object. THIS is reality (uggghhh – I’m a dad of two cuties). Every Thursday through Sunday from September to December. Yep.</p>
<p>This is what your daughter could say in an email: “While I understand that it would be more convenient for you to meet at your home, I would feel more comfortable in a public setting. Could we arrange to meet at the Starbucks on 111 Very-Near-The-Interviewers-Home-Road?”</p>
<p>Your daughter’s concerns should be respected.</p>
<p>That would annoy me, to drag the GC into it. The GC simply has nothing to do whatsoever with my kids getting alumni interviews. She’s not arranging them, she has no idea what anyone’s schedule is … it’s no more her concern, than it would be the concern of the football coach.</p>
<p>…and I’m just saying that I speak on great authority on this matter when I say that no amount of “knowing” a person will preclude innappropriate behavior.</p>
<p>This stranger paranoia, taught to elementary children has grown out of control if it interferes with the innocent process of a college interview. </p>
<p>If you want to see declining numbers of rapes and assaults, then as a young woman 18 to 30, do not drink, never go with a young man alone without googling him, have your mom sit in a car on the same block as his dorm/apartment, never go to a party at a stranger’s house, etc. We need more paranoia about spring break trips (Natalie Holloway), and underage drinking, than fear of evil Ivy interviewers.</p>
<p>T26E4- Yes, they will continue to be objectified for far longer than the first three months of college, I’m afraid.</p>
<p>“If someone wants to try something (such as NSM’s professor who made a pass at her), he’ll do so regardless of whether there is a preexisting relationship or not. If anything – there’s MORE risk, if he knows the cute girl is coming in.”</p>
<p>Agreed. I think people have a false sense of security with people they “know” – professors, parents of classmates, etc. The vast majority of violence against women is perpetrated by people they know. My interviewees know my full name, address, college and class year. Their parents know where they will be and for how long. They can carry a cell phone with a panic button. If that’s still an unacceptably unsafe situation, then so is a faculty office, dorm, and so on.</p>
<p>A interviewer who is thoughtful and considerate will place the best interest of the student above his or her own convenience. I think that most students would prefer an environment outside the home. As several posters mentioned, many students don’t really care where the meeting is held and they are fine going to someone’s house, but the interviewer doesn’t know that ahead of time, so why not do what is best for the majority of students?</p>
<p>If an interviewer is too busy, has childcare responsibilities, etc. that prevent them from doing off-site interviews, then they shouldn’t volunteer. Wait until a point in your life when you have enough time to do a proper job.</p>
<p>I had my interviews at Starbucks and one was on the phone.</p>
<p>Suggestion for the OP:</p>
<p>You have the interviewer’s full name and phone number. Google both and see what comes up. I found LinkedIn profiles most useful. Most professionals have one. You can find out which year the interviewer graduated from the college and where he worked. That may give you enough information to help you decide.</p>
<p>Hmmm interesting conversation. I’ve been on more business trips with men than I care to think about and used to work as a young 20something for our state legislator. BUT I still would not allow my senior in high school to go to the home of a man to interview unless there would be someone else there.</p>
<p>My DD had a similar situation as a high school senior. She was responsible for an art auction fundraiser and had contacted many artists in our area to collect donations of artwork. Most artists dropped off their donations at the school but one male artist asked her to pick it up at his home. I would not allow her to go alone - I drove her and waited in the car while she picked up the donation and had him complete some paperwork. While I was waiting, the artist’s wife and child returned home. Come to find out he had been expecting them earlier so they should have been home when she arrived. No problem…but do I regret my decision? Nope, not at all. I’d do it the same way over again. Why take a chance with something like that? Just the fact that the question is being debated should be enough of a flag not to allow it.</p>
<p>I just think it’s not smart on your part, the part of your daughter, or the interviewer to allow a situation such as this. I mean, “use common sense”…what does that mean to your daughter if she’s trapped by someone twice her size in an inappropriate way with no way to escape? What is worth taking that risk?</p>
<p>Your daughter will be in college soon, and will be in strange men’s dorm rooms. I assume she will be in a coed dorm, by floor or by room. She will be at a greater danger in any of these situations than in the living room of an alumnus with his wife and children roaming about.</p>
<p>I went to college in 1974, and had to learn a lot about how to deal with different situations.</p>
<p>As long as she goes to his house with the understanding that she doesn’t accept alcohol or drugs, and that she leaves if she feels unsafe, she should be fine.</p>
<p>"This is what your daughter could say in an email: “While I understand that it would be more convenient for you to meet at your home, I would feel more comfortable in a public setting. Could we arrange to meet at the Starbucks on 111 Very-Near-The-Interviewers-Home-Road?”</p>
<p>Your daughter’s concerns should be respected."</p>
<p>The G/C finds an available office, that’s it. No one is annoyed. They’re happy to do it - his experience is that they are actually “thrilled” to help in anyway they can. Why wouldn’t they want their kids to get into a top school?</p>
<p>I do think that the length of a relationship matters - a first time meeting is very different than repeated encounters. Most girls can figure out when a professor has his eye on them or is of that ilk. Typically, these guys are repeat offenders and are known predators and girls avoid them.</p>
<p>Some alums do interviews at their house because it is easier for them then traveling to a public place to meet. I’ve had I think 3 alumni interviews this year, all with men alums, and my parents have no given a second thought about it being at their homes. It’s really ridiculous to cause an extra issue.</p>
<p>Your son/daughter is a big boy/girl. They can handle themselves. -_-</p>
<p>I happened to answer the phone when the alumni interviewer called for DD (on her ED app). She told me that since we lived nearby, she would like to have interview at her home. She actually invited me to come along if I would feel more comfortable with that arrangement. I had not expressed any reservation but I thought it was appropriate for her to make this offer - she understood that I would be sending my teenager to a stranger’s home. I did not end up going. DD went by herself and all was fine. Just thought I would express another option for those interviewers who want to conduct the interviews in their home. Of course, if I had gone, I would have expected to wait in another room during the interview.</p>
<p>I am an interviewer at a selective school. I prefer to conduct interviews in my home for several reasons. I tell the applicants that I prefer to conduct the interview in my home if they are comfortable with that. I make it clear that my husband and kids will be there. I always let them know they are welcome to tell me if they prefer a public place. If they do, I do not hold it against them. I just assume they have parents who are cautious.</p>