Our son enrolled as a freshman this year (Aug 2014). While it’s an incredibly beautiful campus, the students are “party animals” who evaluate their “friends” on how much they can drink and who can get them the most drugs. Look on YouTube and search “Elon Festivus”. I wish I had known this before sending him there. Their “frat” system is also very discriminatory. There’s one called “the plantation”. It’s not hard to imagine what race they cater to. As a person of color, I take great exception to this (as anyone should!!!) There is no room for this type of behavior. He’s just trying to survive and get out as soon as possible. For parents who have kids at Elon already, if your kids are telling you how “incredibly good” Elon is - - do your homework and see if they’re actually going to class or sleeping off last night’s party.
CB45678 oh my goodness, I am so sad to hear your review about Elon. My D is a Junior and on an academic scholarship; which makes Elon affordable for us as we are a middle class family. D attended a very diverse public high school where she had friends from different races, ethnicities and academic abilities. Honestly she has thrived at Elon. I am certain she is attending class; she has made either the President’s list or the Dean’s list every semester. She has made some wonderful friends that are also academically inclined as she is and she has had some wonderful outside learning experiences that are very unique to the program she’s in at Elon. I am familiar with Festivus; I believe it may be put on by the Rugby team rather than by a fraternity; though I’m not certain. I know my daughter and her friends have attended as do many students but you certainly don’t need to drink or do drugs to participate. Having a daughter I am not familiar with the fraternity structure, but I understand that several groups host parties; not just the frats. Just about every school has a party environment; regardless of whether it is public, private, etc. Students who are interested in partying are going to find the party wherever it is. Sometimes it is difficult as freshmen for students to find “their group”. It took my D a while but by trying different clubs and groups, she found peers that are similar to her. We have been thrilled with the education our D has received at Elon; Our D has truly blossomed there and we highly recommend it. I hope that perhaps during spring semester your son can investigate other groups and can find people that share his true interests and that can support him in his academic achievement. Good Luck
Clara2012, thanks for feedback. I wish we had the same opinions. Unfortunately we don’t. Rugby team must be VERY large. Looks like a couple thousand people there. Videos look like “Woodstock gone mosh pit”.
Sigh. We get these posts from students and parents alike from a variety of schools, not just Elon. Unless there is a critical mass that is pointing out some specific issues, it’s hard to determine whether this is an outlier or something of primary concern.
When there was the release of the Rolling Stones article about UVA frats, there was a lot commentary that pointed to some unsavory practices there despite the fact that the frat targeted in the rape accusation was exonerated. One thing that was brought up, which is true, is that there is a popular drinking song that is terribly deregotory to females and supports a lot of the allegations and suspicions about frats. Similar to the “plantation” reference. There are schools that are insulting to Indians due to mascots that refer to them, and the dress up and buffoonery that often results My one son’s school ran the nastiest mock magazine about Catholics one year. Didn’t get called on it, but then they went to far when they hit some more politically incorrect subjects. I can name several dozen incidents and “parties” and situations from any number of schools, that are in terrible taste, and not to most people’s liking. There are Festivus type things at a lot of schools.
My husband’s family was very down about their state flagship after their oldest left the school with a whole list of things that he noted that they felt was horrifying. If I listed them, you wouldn’t be able to guess the school, since they fit so many. Unless you find some controlled school environment like some of the Christian schools as an example of a category, it’s tough to find schools that don’t fit your example of Elon. Some schools that are largely commuter or suitcase may also fit the bill in terms of less happening on campus.
@CB45678 Good luck. I hope your son finds a better fit soon!
CB45678: I am very familiar with Elon and have had both a son and daughter attend the school. Both of them were aware of the party scene you speak about (which can be found at every college), and both easily found other positive and rewarding activities to participate in. The “plantation” story you related is no longer true. The name was given informally to a private house that a few students lived in. It was not a fraternity or a recognized fraternity house. Those students graduated and the “plantation” no longer exists. The Festivus event is organized by students on a spring Saturday morning and certainly looks troubling on the video you refer to (a video made to glamorize and attract students to the event). But the truth is that a very small portion of the student body attends, and the whole thing is over within a couple of hours. The student organizers work with the Town Police to make sure there is security. The young people get full of mud, but it’s mostly just a mosh pit.
Elon is a very strong academic institution with a growing national reputation. I don’t find your description of the university accurate in any way. The first year in college is always a time to adjust and find like-minded friends. I hope your son has a better second semester and flourishes at Elon.
I will say that this is one of my greatest fears…and i know nothing about Elon so i am not pointing directly at it…but that my S (currently a hs sophomore) will somehow end up at a school where drinking is the main activity. i’ve noticed that when a school is accused of this, many here protest by saying “every school is like this.” which actually freaks me out more.
Hmmm…think i’ll start a separate thread on this…in any case, OP, I respect your courage in talking about this…it’s tough to paint a negative blanket over a school like this but i would rather hear it all…the good and the bad…
@SouthernHope, it can be the drinking that gets the attention, at some schools, while quiet times and the myriad other opportunities- clubs, events, community service, religious and cross-cultural activities, committees, arts, music, and theater groups, ad infinitum- get ignored in the common pubic perception. That’s not to say it’s always easy to ignore the raucous behaviors. But it’s good to try to get a read on how much else is going on, on campus. Best wishes.
College drinking? Yawn.
@SouthernHope Drinking is a choice on every college campus, with the exception of perhaps BYU. Yes there will be drinking, but each student makes an individual choice about whether to participate in those activities. On most college campuses there will be plenty to do besides party and drink, you just have to find the friends that will participate in those activities with you. If you raised a son with a good head on his shoulders, I am sure he will make the correct choices drinking or not.
OP - sorry your son is having a bad experience at Elon - but I remain a very strong advocate. My son was an underachiever in hs and really disliked school. His comments on Elon academics have ranged from good to awesome. He was so passionate about his intro economics class that he added economics as a second minor! He has a great adviser in his major and is currently taking a class with the department head - who he calls phenomenal.
He is in a fraternity and has been the house manager for the past 2 years. We are on campus several times a year - have met many fraternity brothers - all have been nice young men. The fraternity is just as likely to host a bagel brunch as they are an evening party. They also do charitable events and sporting activities. Last year - a bunch of them took a yoga class!
Elon is like any college campus in that the wild drinking and partying is extremely visible. But that doesn’t mean that is all there is to do. It may not be the best fit for your son, but from your description, I wonder how hard he has tried to find better groups of kids to hang with.
And I have to add - Festivus - a few hours listening to music and getting very muddy! Yes, some kids are drinking, but there were police present to supervise. My son did it last year and I have a cute picture he sent me of him posing with his gf, covered in mud. Silly, but harmless.
OP - do you get the weekly email from Elon with all of the activities and events on campus? If not, you should, and discuss with your son. There are lectures, cultural events, community service opportunities, etc. Has he gone to a basketball game this winter? How about signing up for an activity at the gym? There are numerous programs next week to honor Dr. King. Has he looked into joining a religious group on campus? How about an on campus job for a few hours a week?
http://www.elon.edu/E-Net/Article/104993
More activities this week, keeping in mind January is a slow time on campus:
OP - It’s a shame that Elon is not working out for your son. I hope he finds a school that he is happy with next year. In the meantime, if he wants to hang out with some non-partiers, tell him to go to the computer lab. He will find my nerdy son and all his friends.
Drinking is at every school. Period. Yes, some schools are better and some schools are worse. However the choice to participate is your child’s. Take it from me, Elon is VERY strict on enforcing their code of conduct. My sophomore son learned that lesson the hard way. When I’ve talked to parents who have children at other colleges, they were appalled at what landed my son in trouble. They couldn’t believe it and said that would never happen at their child’s school. My son’s learned a very valuable lesson, however, and has grown because of his mistake. Festivus? It’s put on by the GDI’s (g. damn independents - in other words, the non-fraternity males). My other son’s school, Miami of Ohio, has Green Beer Day which makes Festivus look like child’s play. Closer to my home, the annual SUNY Cortland/Ithaca College football game is celebrated by “Cortaca” which would make ANY parent cringe. Google Green Beer Day and/or Cortaca and you’ll see how tame Festivus is in comparison. No school is perfect and unfortunately people do not always find the right school the first time around. Sorry your son isn’t enjoying his time at Elon but it’s wrong to paint Elon in such broad strokes based on very limited experience. I hope your son is able to find a better fit for him.
While drinking is a part of many kid’s college experience, I do believe there is a difference in the role that drinking plays on different campuses. My daughter is at Xavier in Cincinnati, and picked it specifically because it was not “a party school.” No fraternities or sororities. No huge campus parties and no pressure to party on weeknights at all. She has been very happy but I know of kids who are looking for a “party atmosphere” don’t particularly like it there and many end up going elsewhere. So. Just to say, every campus has its vibe and to say that there is drinking on every campus does not mean drinking plays the same role on every campus. Kids need to find their fit.
I am sorry to hear that your son is having a hard time adjusting. But to come on here and make general statements is slanderous. Instead of pointing out what you think is wrong, have you you looked into what Rockville stated? I encourage you, when looking at his next college, that you do your “homework” yourself in reviewing the school. Because if you are going to discount every college that has a “festivus” type of day, your list of schools is gong to be very short.
Drinking does go on at Elon, like every college except for a few in America. A couple of your statements need some clarification. First the Plantation comment. A couple of years ago the house in question, nicknamed Plantation was rented by brothers from the KA fraternity. Last Fall (2013), a party was throw at the house and a guest was insulted because of their color. Elon got involved and removed those people from that house and the KA no longer have the house know as the Plantation because of Elon. I do not know of another University that takes such quick action in those regards. The second item on Fectivus, is a Spring Celebration that started several years back. They coordinate with the police and such to ensure it runs as safely as possible. Compared to some of the other traditions at other colleges it is pretty well organized and maintained. Also as an FYI, just this past semester, as Frat was suspended for three years from campus for hazing. Again, Elon acted in a manner quickly to suspend, for actions that frats on other campus do alot. Is Elon perfect, no it is not. I wish there were more activities for the Students to do, but that is also up to the students.
My son is a Junior there and not in a Frat, he has had both ups and downs. As he would at any university. Sorry you do not like your son first semester, their are always a couple. Hopefully with Winter term ending up, your son has finished the transfer process. I do encourage you to transfer as from your post, you will not be happy at Elon. But do expect the same amount of drinking no matter where he goes. My opinion is that the drinking age for beer should be lower to 18, that would give these kids the chance to drink a lower % alcohol first in their life legally. Rather than everyone going to hard liquor when under 21.
I’m so sorry to hear about your son’s experience. I really hope he finds a better fit and as a member of the class of 2018 as well, it is sad we will be losing him.
I am a first-year at Elon, and I do not drink. Those who know I don’t drink respect my decision. I still go to parties occasionally for the dancing and people don’t even know or care that I’ve not had anything to drink. Then again, I’m a female. I think no matter where you go, you’re going to find rowdy guys that are big partiers and make other guys feel bad when they don’t drink. In society in general, there is a lot more stress on guys to drink than girls, and it’s a shame. It’s all about finding the right group of people. If some guys disapprove of your son’s behavior, then they aren’t good friends anyway. I’ve found friends who accept me for who I am and could care less if I consume alcohol. I’m also a part of the Student Union Board, and we set up weekend activities that are alternatives to parties.
I came to Elon for the academics and for the price, but I definitely agree that Elon students like to party. There’s so much more to the school than just partying though; if you take advantage of all the study abroad, research and internship opportunities I think they outweigh the party scene. For students who don’t drink, there’s even a special living learning community called ASHES. I’m in a normal dorm, though, and have still made friends who don’t drink and those who drink and are super accepting of my decision. To any concerned parents reading this, there are niches for people who aren’t party animals at Elon, I promise.
And a lot of students really do care about going to class and their academics, too. Just because people like to blow off steam on the weekends doesn’t mean they’re bad students.
PS) I definitely agree that the frat system is discriminatory. Not all the frats. But there’s one frat in particular that has a reputation as being racist, and that really bothers me, and I completely understand why it bothers you. I don’t really know what they’ve done, if anything, but I heard that they have that reputation. Elon works really hard to rid the campus of racism when it is reported, though. Last week, apparently a car drove past a student of color and the person in the car shouted a derogatory comment. Administration is making a huge deal out of this incident, as they should, and it really goes to show how much they’re trying to make the campus a safe and accepting place for everybody.
The OP’s son’s experience echoes that of my daughter, who is also a racial minority who attended Elon. The whole “Plantation” thing is beyond belief but is true. In fact, when my daughter told me about it (she went to Elon last year and finished out the year but left) I asked her advisor during Parents Weekend, and was told that, unfortunately, it is true. In addition, the first week there, my daughter was warned that, as a person of color, she “might not be welcomed at” some frats’ parties. The first month there, two female roommates (one black and one Jewish) woke to find the white board outside their dorm room scrawled on with “KKK” and a swastika. Fortunately, Hillel protested this happening and the president met with that organization. When I asked whether the president would be meeting with the Black Students’ association, I was told that the black student involved “didn’t want to make a big deal out of it.” On Parents’ Weekend, my husband and I were eating in a dining hall when we witnessed a table of white girls almost falling out of their chairs laughing at a student from Asia, who was eating with chopsticks with the bowl held close to his chin, as is done in his home country. The girls were screaming with laughter, and imitating him. He couldn’t see them because they were behind him. It was as if they had never seen an Asian person eat before, and maybe they had not, but one would think college aged students would not be so immature and juvenile and intolerant. My daughter started dating another minority student, who was in her dorm hallway one day when a drunk white frat boy called him the “N” word. As part of a diversity group on campus, my daughter mentioned these things (and more, much more) to other kids of color, and the black kids, particularly, told her that this is just how life is, she must learn to tolerate it, and they, too, hated the school for the first two or three years. A diversity panel that my daughter and her friends organized one evening to talk about campus racial issues drew something like three kids. I will say that Elon does have a very elaborate mechanism for dealing with racist incidents and complaints, and that should have signaled to me that they have a big problem in this area. One thing I learned from this experience: Google the name of the college you are thinking of going to and “racist incidents” and see what pops up. You might be surprised.