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<p>LOL. And we are not braggin'. We are just making "positive comments", too. Sheesh. The hole is getting deeper, Hepstar. It would be better just to admit that you enjoyed the attention as shown by the smiley. It's O.K.. We all like a stroke now and again.</p>
<p>And I don't think Hepstar is a troll.</p>
<p>I do want to welcome Barno to the board.</p>
<p>I think Hepstar's little sister is going to get really high SAT scores, too.
That "evil"/creative streak is a sign of great intelligence.</p>
<p>I would like to welcome Barno to the board as well, as he/she one of the few people here who actually understands my point.</p>
<p>Crumudgeon, you are bragging because many of you parents admitted in your posts that they have no problem bragging about your kids. There is a fine line between positive comments and bragging and many people cross it. I'd hardly call acknowledging someone's appreciation a form of boasting. All I did was give a thank you. I always thought of that as a form of courtesy, not a means of showing off. </p>
<p>Here's an example of this principle:</p>
<p>Say that you are wearing a suit and someone says "That suit looks really nice." I'm sure any decent person would respond with a thank you. This is the same thing I did when I responded to the comment about my SAT score. This is not bragging. However, If I were to respond with a comment like "I know. Isn't it great? I am so glad that I have it. I got it for 50% off while most idiots paid the full price, " I would then have crossed the line.</p>
<p>This example is a bit extreme, but I think the message it contains is pretty easy to grasp. Even if you don't comprehend it, you could always have your smart children that you love to brag about explain it to you ;).</p>
<p>Hepstar, why does it bother you so much? You're gonna be dealing with it forever, and I guarantee you'll want to brag about your kids at some point when they do something amazing. My advice is that you learn to get over it. Talking about accomplishments really isn't that big of a deal unless it's blatant bragging.</p>
<p>It may not seem like a big deal, but must people who brag aren't even aware of how much they annoy other people. They just keep going on and on without realizing that they are bothering someone. I have learned to tolerate bragging. I have to due to the amount of it I hear. However, tolerance or not, it is still unnecessary and annoying. When someone brags to me, I just zone out and think about something else.</p>
<p>It's curmudgeon.</p>
<p>(Psst. Hepstar. You weren't the one braggin' on your SAT scores. I never said you were braggin". I just pointed out that you liked it when someone else did. ;))</p>
<p>I, too, detest braggarts. I live by the philosophy that "You don't tell people you're good. You let other people tell you." </p>
<p>But a parent sharing positive news about their kid? It's O.K. with me when done with some social skill.</p>
<p>It's all about intent. Yes, I tend to 'brag' about my kid, and I 'brag' about her brainiac friends, and I 'brag' about the gifted athlete son of one of my closest friends (he will be a professional baseball player mark my words), and I 'brag' about babysitting for Stone Cold Steve Austin and what a little crazy little maniac he was even at the age of 8 (our parents are friends, I had no choice). Oh wait a dang minute....I think I used the wrong word. I wasn't 'bragging'....I was paying compliment to all these people and their accomplishments. </p>
<p>You have a choice Hepstar; you can be appreciative of 'compliments' paid you and find something worth complimenting in others. Or you can just get worked up over semantics. :)</p>
<p>I'm sorry curmudgeon. Spelling is not my strength. Yes, I appreciate the attention, but I do not like being used as an instrument for bragging. Again, there is a difference. When my parents are happry for me when I accomplish something, I do enjoy their acknowledgement. It shows that the work I put in was worthwhile. However, I do not like when this attention extends beyond the confines of the family. When my folks start telling other people what my scores are and what a good student I am, I don't like it because it should be enough for them alone to appreciate my accomplishments. </p>
<p>Come on parents, if you know your children are good, isn't that enough for you? Are their accomplishments really going to be any more special if the neighbors know about them?</p>
<p>By the way ldmom06, I don't see how talking about babysitting Steve Austn could be anything other than bragging. I mean who are you really complementing other than yourself, your own babysitting ability, and the fact that you knew a pro wrestler.</p>
<p>It couldn't be bragging, for pete's sake, it's not my 'accomplishment' or whatever you would call pro-wrestling. Actually, funny story....his mom wouldn't admit he was involved in wrestling for the first ten years of his career. She kept telling everyone he was still in college...lol! We kept expecting him to reappear with his doctorate.</p>
<p>But I am proud of him; he was a good kid despite having had a tough early childhood, he was a good friend to my younger brothers, our families are close (his mom was with mine at the hospital last week) and he has become successful in a weird kind of way. :) Yep...that's bragging I guess...but not about myself.</p>
<p>And might I add this. Why do you care so much that your parents are proud of YOU? What does it matter? How are you harmed? Really. With all that is wrong in the world, this is what you complain about?</p>
<p>Hepstar,</p>
<p>Could your complaint really be about an invasion of your privacy, not bragging per se? It seems that you're uncomfortable with information about you being widely known to people outside your comfort zone. Of course, I could be reading this wrong. I guess the question is, if you did something public (won a swim meet, for example) would you still mind your mother telling people about it. Just trying to figure out if the discomfort is with "my kid is so great" in general, or the sharing of what should be no one's business.</p>
<p>I was actually about to settle down and try to put this argument to rest. That is until I read the posts that some of you posted on page 4 that I hadn't viewed yet.</p>
<p>The whole thing about my "child" fa</p>
<p>Yes!!! Heroes is coming on now. It is the last episode until January. I am done debating for tonight. Good night to all and try not to brag too much.</p>
<p>Hepstar - You are welcome to post here and you shouldn't feel as if you are not. There are many student posters on the parent forum and visa versa. There is no guarantees regarding responses....you may like some of them and you may not. That's how it goes. </p>
<p>I wonder....have you asked your parents to stop 'bragging' about you? My initial reaction was that your complaint was frivolous and you certainly didn't lend gravitas to your point with those comments about about your 5 year old sister. BUT, I do recall how stressful if was for my d during her senior year...the whole college application process is overwhelming and I know she got to the point where she was just sick of talking about college. And there does come a point when it seems like a constant onslaught...and I think young people lose perspective. It feels like constant assessment and comparison, which no one would enjoy.</p>
<p>If you truly feel your parents are contributing to this, you have to sit down with them and make them understand why you are uncomfortable. This would probably more wise use of your time than soliciting advice from parents you don't know.</p>
<p>What about this situation. In our town the local newspaper will print as a public service just about any award, course, honor that a child receives. Thing is it is never done without submission from the family. As I stated early in this thread, I find outward bragging poor form so never did this. Come to find out judges for the larger scholarships read and use these "photo ops" in their deliberations. Hence the dilemma; do I do something I dislike (bragging to locals) or miss out on scholarship opportunity. Not an easy call.</p>
<p>BurnThis makes an interesting point. My son recently informed me that a fellow student saw my posts here at CC and told my son that I was posting about him. Fortunately son didn't mind and I had asked his permission. And like WashDad I only brag about my kids when I'm awake.</p>
<p>My highly personalized definition of bragging: if I like you, youre not bragging. </p>
<p>I'm thrilled when someone asks about my daughters, but I can't initiate their accomplishments as a topic of conversation without feeling like a jerk. My big objection to bragging is that few others feel the same restraint. In fact, because I don't brag about my kids, some acquaintances presume I have nothing to say on the subject and must therefore be dying for a little vicarious peek into the life of Mom of Superchild.</p>
<p>I agree with curmudgeon when he says above that "you don't tell people, you let people tell you." There are many CC posters whose children are just ... amazing. The kids I consider most gifted are those whose accomplishments I've had to infer after following the board for a few years. Their parents post their children's accomplishments sparingly, only on the appropriate threads, and with an admirable matter-of-fact humility. I figure these folks aren't exaggerating one whit, so their kids really are that brilliant or talented or unique. (I'd identify 'em, but I don't want to embarrass 'em.) Its helpful, not bragging, when a parent posts a kids stats or class rank on admissions or merit aid threads for particular schools. But some manage to slip such info into the extra-long sheet threads.</p>
<p>Confession: I have no idea what Hepstar's SAT scores were. :)</p>
<p>Hepstar - I do not brag about my kids.</p>
<p>My mother brags to me about our relatives and her acquaintances all the time, and it makes me uncomfortable.</p>
<p>Perhaps it's because I myself lead a quiet life and don't do anything most people would consider bragworthy. Does this make me a lesser person? If a kid does nothing that is worth bragging about (stellar SATs, admission to Ivy League schools, play on the winning team, etc.) have they somehow "lost out" to those who do?</p>
<p>Bragging suggests that life is about being successful, that doing admirable things is what defines being an admirable person.</p>
<p>When parents overdo it, it can alienate their children - both because it impinges on their privacy, and because it raises the question - do my parents love me because of my accomplishments or because of who I am? What will happen if I fail at something?</p>
<p>I liked your example of the suit, by the way.</p>
<p>Also, there are plenty of people who decide never to have kids because they feel they overdid the parenting thing with their own siblings. Your experiences with your sister are perfectly valid in contributing to your assessment about how you will feel about being a father.</p>
<p>I have never been a name dropper in casual conversation. If asked about our son, I merely tell them where he is attending/major, that he is working hard and doing well. That usually answers all questions and does not constitute bragging imho.</p>
<p>I generally don't brag about my DD except to Grandparents and Godparents, although I appreciate when someone congratulates me on a public accomplishment (ie, NM Semifinalist). The greatest thing about her (if you'll indulge me) is that she is doing very well in spite of adversity--she's ADHD, processing issues and disgraphia, and a chronic illness. Most folks don't know about these and I keep them in my heart--they are for her to discuss, if and when she chooses. They also keep her from doing things like sports or music, but I'm glad to hear about these or other successes from others.</p>