Do you tie grades to your financial support?

<p>2k for an 8th grader is waaay tougher than I am. I’d think $200 would sting. Wait a sec…2k for a class trip??? middle school? My kids’ 12th grade clas trip to DC was for a week of service (and that was from a fancy prep.) I think it cost them $150.</p>

<p>OP, if the dau wants to blow her ed funds on hits and misses, some families would say, let her learn from mistakes. But, at 22, I’d expect her to understand when you push for the “I wants” and when you don’t. She could finish two years where she is, have alonger track record, then transfer. Supposedly, she fine tuned already- between 18 and 22. At a certan point, you do have to ask why she eneded up at college 1 iin the first place, if she took 4 years to get it all figured out. Sorry.</p>

<p>HImom-she worked in a restaurant for the three years after high school. She started at hot dog stand and fell into this other FT job where she rose to assistant manager. That’s why she chose the major. She found she loved the work, especially enjoyed the cooking. She already knows about the crazy hours, etc. It was BEFORE she had this job that she didn’t know what she wanted to do.</p>

<p>My ex feels she’s not aiming high enough, that restaurant people tend to drink too much, have lives where they don’t see their families what with working late at night and sleeping all day, etc. He also thinks she’s flitting since she was talking transfer almost as soon as the second semester began. But he seemed ok with it until he saw the grades. </p>

<p>Looking-she ended up there because her dad wanted her in a small school in a small town to remove “distractions”. He himself is from a small town and although he works in a large city, doesn’t like the idea of D actually living in one. He also thought that being more isolated would mean she wouldn’t want to come home all the time (poor bus service, long drive on only one possible road in/out to where they live). She had concerns right away but dad calls the shots.</p>

<p>I’ve been getting some good suggestions from someone in a college admissions office. She’s going to look into them and continue talking with her dad.</p>

<p>C and above we pay. Below C we don’t.</p>

<p>We don’t require any specific grades. Just do the best you can and for heaven’s sakes, graduate in FOUR years. But if my kid were not making forward progress towards a degree? I’d quit paying for college…why keep throwing money down a rat hole?</p>

<p>We agreed to pay for four years of undergraduate school and that was it. Anything done beyond that was going to be on the kids’ dimes and they knew it. One kiddo did take summer courses one year and paid for them. </p>

<p>There are LOTS of majors that can lead to careers in restaurant management.</p>

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<p>Please explain why you think this is the case. It is not. Your daughter NEVER could get loans beyond the staffords unless she had a cosigner. She can STILL get those Stafford Loans IF her father (the custodial parent at this point) completes the FAFSA.</p>

<p>We didn’t put any strings on our financial support, and we regret it. Son’s on schedule to graduate in 4 years. But, his internship potential is slipping through his fingers due to gpa. </p>

<p>Oh, well. That’s a life lesson for him and us. For now, our main concern is getting him to graduation. After that, life as a busboy will be his problem.</p>

<p>I did not but I would warn them if I sense them do badly. Fortunately I have not dealt with it yet.</p>

<p>Your Daughter needs to have a heart to heart with Dad to know what the financial implications are. At age 22, she has negotiate what he/the trust is willing to contribute.</p>

<p>My parents have never given me a GPA requirement (e.g. you must have 3.0 or else), but if I began getting low (Cs or below), they would probably want an explanation and signs of improvement. They pay for all of my schooling at an in-state public university, so I respect their choices (although we did fight over whether I would graduate early or not). </p>

<p>Then again, my grades have never been a problem.</p>

<p>Well, he just told her he won’t pay for anything other than the college where she spent last year. He will not fill out a FAFSA for her to get a loan towards anything and he will not make up any differences towards any costs if she somehow got some other kind of loan. Why he paid for the transfer app and took her apartment-hunting, I don’t know. He told her months ago she could transfer to a bigger school in a bigger city with a more directly related major. </p>

<p>She went where she went last year because that’s where he picked and she wanted to get closer to him again after years of prickliness. She was concerned from the beginning with the size of the place and the town and the options academically. She asked as early as Feb. about transferring and he agreed. If he had wanted to place restrictions on any transfer, he should have done so then.</p>

<p>But it doesn’t matter now. He’s drawn his line in the sand. I’m not sure what she plans on doing.</p>

<p>So sorry you and your D are dealing with this. It certainly seems unfair to agree and visit a school then “pull the rug” out from under her. Hugs to you.</p>