<p>Our PS option is mediocre and deteriorating too, and while I am excited for my child to go to BS, I am also profoundly sad. We are very close, and I hate sending her 3k miles for a decent education. Thank goodness for skyle, email, texting, etc. If there were a viable option here, we’d do it. And as an educator myself, I find what’s happening completely depressing. Talked to another parent today about what to do with our capable kids. Those of you who have magnets, IB programs, and generally okay PSs have options I wish we had.</p>
<p>Dive, I was serious about being thankful for the ag program. It’s really excellent.</p>
<p>Baystateresident, I’m in NY state.</p>
<p>oh, oops, how embarrassing. i thought you meant… becoming a farmer or something along those lines… sorry :(</p>
<p>Okay - but here’s the deal. I’ve interviewed “homeschool” kids who did well at MIT. And rural kids without access to “fancy programs” and AP classes. And urban kids in failing districts.</p>
<p>I agree that BS enhances the opportunity - but YOU ALL are self-selecting parents. Are you telling me that without BS (and the expense that goes with it) your children are not proactive enough to find other ways to distinguish themselves? Profiles of PS kids I saw didn’t have anything to do with captain of debate, lead in a play, etc. They found alternatives:</p>
<ol>
<li>Eagle scout projects</li>
<li>Even girl scouts has a Juliette program that lets a girl do projects without a troop (and also Studio 2B)</li>
<li>started a chapter of SADD</li>
<li>volunteered in the community</li>
<li>had self-motivated hobbies (I’ve seen amazing art, sculpture, science experiments, etc.)
etc…</li>
</ol>
<p>So this artificial “prep” thing just makes me sad. Because Adcoms do take “circumstances” in to account. </p>
<p>If you didn’t have a BS option, would you really be the type of parent who would abdicate your child’s college future to a bad PS situation? I think not. You’d find a way - or the child would, to get what you needed even if it was to supplement. </p>
<p>I, for instance, learned about CTY at Johns Hopkins from Neato. There are more options now than ever for supplementing a lousy education climate.</p>
<p>DiveAlive- that is what she meant. “How to Care for Large Animals” etc. When you live in a rural area, that’s what a lot of students go into. I am also really happy that is there for them.</p>
<p>I know that the best thing that happened to me in my life time was attending a BS. There, I had so many things to do, including wrestle, run track, write for the school paper, draw for the school literary publication, play in the school dance band, …none of which my local public school then offered. If I had stayed in public school, my busy little mind and hands would have landed me in juvenile court instead of Harvard.</p>
<p>:-)</p>
<p>Okay toombs - that was good. Point taken. I wanted BS for the same reason. Access to more “stuff” and kids who think like me.</p>
<p>And I think my counselor pushed it to keep me out of jail too - lol!</p>
<p>Thanks, Exie. I’m sure that we both look better in grey business suits off the racks of Brooks Brothers than in orange jump suits issued from the bowels of the county jail.</p>
<p>Joking aside, you raise a real issue. My husband used to be the Principal at a night high school for kids who had dropped out of day school. The overwhelming majority of the students were “talented and gifted” on tests, but couldn’t play the game. I spent this morning with our State Superintendent of Instruction. The entire focus is on remediation, special needs and test scores, all in an underfunded environment. Of course I’m angry that my own children’s needs (they’re high performing also) aren’t being met, but then I wonder if we should really expect public ed to be everything to everyone? Exie and Toombs are not unique. Smart kids are very at risk in this system. But if we’re going to provide for all, we need more funding, and that won’t happen unless… ???</p>
<p>Public education can be downright HARMFUL to gifted kids, leading to all kinds of issues with depression and loneliness. Some kids get so demoralized that they do end up dropping out. The game can be very difficult and is often compounded when so much of the grade is based on fluff. Not only do the highly gifted suffer psychically, they often don’t even have very high grades.</p>
<p>Raise your hand if you’ve ever lost points in math because you didn’t show “work” on a problem that was so easy to do mentally that the thought of writing anything down never crossed your mind.</p>
<p>Raise your hand if you’ve ever been told to put the sketch away and take notes when all you really need to do to remember is listen, since you’ve already read the book and no one’s going to be discussing anything.</p>
<p>But back to the OP: I agree with what Winterset said in post 10 and what others have said in the many incarnations of this thread. Namely, the effect is more a correlation than a causation. Kids who are admitted to top preps are the same TYPES that top colleges are looking for. They want passionate thinkers who are willing to become involved in the life of the campus and so do the top BS. It’s not really a big surprise.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>As to doodling, there are studies that show that in fact doodling actually helps concentration on the subject at hand for those inclined to doodle.</p>
<p>And while showing your work is important in newly learned concepts to identify possible misunderstanding, the idea of being graded on it for work long mastered is demeaning.</p>
<p>And I’ll argu that boarding school is better than the crumbling publics for even average students at average boarding schools. Not to talk goaliegirl down, but she never has been (to her own admission as well) Ivy League material. Not even close. She’s always been a plugger who realizes the value of learning, but isn’t necessarily motivated to understand the meaning of life.</p>
<p>To me, the biggest benefit of her boarding school education is the genuine relationships between faculty and students - people who are concerned about how you are doing after class, while you are on break, and next year when they are coaching your team. It is wonderful that the experience of learning is socially enjoyable from a relationship perspective and not just a route to a better outcome. In many ways college will be a letdown as it is difficult at any small college (much less the larger schools she will attend) to have the level of integration of faculty and students she has at boarding school. However, I think the years of this positive social reinforcement of learning will make her experience at college far better than if she was just another public school student coming off the assembly line.</p>
<p>It’s not what they teach you that makes it special, it is the overall experience that makes it worth it.</p>
<p>Ditto to the last three posts. </p>
<p>Maybe we should say - “Boarding School - Where it’s okay for bright students to be themselves. And where their peers abound in greater numbers.”</p>
<p>I know that’s why my daughter asked to apply. After we let her try out summer school there was no turning back. She had a taste of what a challenge was like and craved nothing but that ever since.</p>
<p>For my d bs is a place where it is ok to be smart, passionate and just herself.</p>
<p>With all the love in my heart I have known that I needed to find a place that “she could find her own kind”, kids like her and adults that knew how to challenge yet support her ability to operate outside of the box.</p>
<p>As I searched for places that would allow my child to thrive not just exist, I found bs to be the best option. We reside in a major city where I firmly believe valuing education is a joke to most parents and school administrators. The needs of the child who they fear will not “be left behind” are non existent. I feel secure in saying this for I am part of this system.</p>
<p>As the child of an public school educator, I went to catholic school, my mom knew the system from the inside out, and that was 40 years ago. In this time frame I hate to say, but I feel things have only gotten worst. </p>
<p>Yes, if bs had not happened we would have found away for her to succeed. I home-schooled for 3 years, and though it worked better than the public school system, my d wanted peers.</p>
<p>This entire bs experience has taught me that names can make a difference but matching your kids needs and wants make for the best experience possible. When looking at bs, the IVY schools were never in our thoughts. As we look forward to what awaits us I think we will look for the same type of qualities as we did this time, fit.</p>
<p>“I -I am going to be a storm - a flame -
I need to fight whole armies all alone;
I have ten hearts; I have a hundred arms; I feel
Too strong to war with mortals -
BRING ME GIANTS!”</p>
<pre><code> ~Edmond Rosland, “Cyrano de Bergerac”
</code></pre>
<p>(Correction: “Rostand”, not Rosland.)</p>
<p>In my original post…my question was specific to advice related to staying or leaving a new england boarding school - and the ultimate impact on college admissions. </p>
<p>Your replies have been so informative (and entertaining in some cases…!), that I now enjoy this blog for so many reasons beyond that that single question!!
Now…I would like to circle back to that question and ask if others have faced the decision to leave a new england boarding school after one year, for whatever reason, and how that process went and ultimate outcome.</p>
<p>Thanks so much for your candor!! Hard to find in this climate of all things about life are perfect (when sometimes they are not!)</p>
<p>Thank you!! This is super helpful. Appreciate your sharing!</p>
<p>We like you too!</p>
<p>Okay - I went back and read the original post. Can you define “disappointing” (without giving info that might “out” your son) so we can get closer to the issue with our advice?</p>
<p>If he’s unhappy, he won’t have the creative and academic energy to do what he needs to at the time of college interviews. I can tell you I tend to rank low - those students who show no enthusiasm about their high school experience because it feels like it will translate to college. The best students make something even when “nothing” exists.</p>
<p>So if you son is homesick, or unhappy, or just dragging academically and he WANTS to come home, you might consider that as an option and find ways to stimulate him when he returns. </p>
<p>No college will count “leaving” against him. Boarding school is an acquired taste and we get that. Some will also just assume finances were an issue in this bad economy. What WILL count is what he does with his time when he’s home if he decides not to continue. Will he come home and excel, get his grades up? Participate in EC and show us passion for something not pushed by a parent or teacher?</p>
<p>Or - is “disappointing” meaning that his grades are the same? That’s to be expected. I went to a gifted PS program and the first year at Exeter still kicked my “assets.” My daughter is already prepared to suffer through her first year at BS. </p>
<p>But - most colleges see some BS “B’s” and “C’s” as harder and more substantial than some public school A’s? It just depends.</p>
<p>I know renewal contracts are coming up. Can you give us some clues and we’ll try to help give you options.</p>
<p>I answered your question directly related to my experience with my S and hs wish to leave his present school the question of him leaving came up often. Check my response #30. Good luck in whatever you chose to do.</p>
<p>None of my children will qualify for an athletic scholarship. My child who’s a freshman at BS right now is very happy. Thus, I don’t have any personal stories to tell.</p>
<p>From your posts, though, it sounds as if your son’s problems mainly lie with this year’s seniors and PGs. Next year, those students will be attending college. How does your son feel about the classes of '11 through '13? </p>
<p>Next year, if he were to stay at his school, he’d be a sophomore. He might play on the varsity level. I think the transition from middle school to high school can be very hard for boys, particularly if they were big men on the (middle school) campus. </p>
<p>Your son might have had the same reservations about high school if he’d stayed home. He’d be a freshman, and he’d be low in the high school pecking order. Sophomore year might be much better for him.</p>
<p>From your posts, it sounds as if at this point, college admissions are the sticking point. If you think he could attend a school with good academics and good coaching at home, I’m not certain that it’s worth it to make him stay at a school which makes him miserable. Does he have friends at school?</p>