I’m not against drinking, I’m against drinking to get drunk. I’m against drinking and driving. My H doesn’t drink much anymore. I probably drink more alcohol per year than he does and I rarely have more than a couple in one night. I just got home and am about to make a G&T and sit outside and decompress. All the boys have slowed down their consumption from what I can tell, but parties, bars and alcohol are still very much central to their social lives ages 22 - 28. I think these days in the time of designated drivers and such that even with the kids, “not” drinking at all is socially acceptable so it is easier for kids that chose not to for any reason.
I had my first beer at 50. I think when I turned 21 someone bought me a gin and tonic, and that’s it for me. One son liked to have a drink to push around the table once he was legal; I suspect he probably drank underage in college and at the girlfriend w parents who were all “oh, it’s cosmopolitan and hipster to let them have alcohol” he drinks much less now that he can afford neither the money or the calories. Other child does not drink, nor did his friends. Just not their thing
I drank in college because it was legal. I never overdid.
My daughter is a sophomore and got into drinking (but not overdoing) while studying in Europe this summer.
Unsure as to what to predict for my son entering next year.
Yep, I drank in and through high school and college. Some of it was even legal! My kids are much better about it, but i know they did have a few drinks in high school at parties. Both have boyfriends who are over 21 and they can have as much as they want. The older one doesn’t really drink often (nor does her boyfriend) and the younger one has a lot of restrictions because of athletics which are just fine with me. Her boyfriend drinks a lot of beer, but she usually doesn’t so that she can be the designated driver. They have Sunday night BBQ’s at his house with most of their teammates, they watch football and I’m sure there is beer there.
Started at 13-14 with the odd glass of wine at New Year’s and other special occasions (parent-sanctioned) which isn’t too unusual where I live. Drank a little more after turning 16 (our drinking age) and 18 (drinking age for anything beyond wine/beer/cider).
I’ve never had more than 7-8 standard drinks in a day, and that only twice. My norm is 2-3 glasses of wine/cider (never cared for beer) or occasionally a glass of something stronger - when I choose to drink, maybe once a fortnight. I’ve never lost control - the effect that scares me - or woken up with a hangover. The best advice I ever got on the subject came from a HS teacher, and is both simple and effective: take it slowly, drink lots of water, and eat something beforehand - i.e. common sense. I recommend taking 30-45 minutes to down several glasses of H2O before going to sleep.
The result of drinking early, in my case, is that I drink in moderation. Harder to achieve IMHO by drinking nothing until college and then grasping for the "forbidden fruit " as soon as the opportunity presents itself. I think the US drinking age brought drunk driving down when passed, a good thing, but it’s always struck me as odd that I can drive, buy a gun, vote, or enlist and ship out to a faraway war (all actions that could have lethal consequences) but can’t yet drink wine legally.
From my perspective, it does not appear that way to me. 7-8 drinks would put me in the hospital.
^^^^
re read what NotverySmart said.
“I’ve never had more than 7-8 standard drinks in a day, and that only twice. My norm is 2-3 glasses of wine/cider”
Probably an interesting corollary question: what do you consider “drinking in moderation” to be?
If you mean parties, no and no. Add a third no if you want my spouse’s experiences too. I went to one party while in college and didn’t care for it at all, so never went to another. I think each of my boys have done likewise. Hubby never went to one at all. He comes from a teetotaling family. I did not.
If you mean “drink any alcohol at all,” then yes, we all do occasionally - not regularly. We’ll pick up a bottle of wine with dinner or have a mixed drink while on vacation, so maybe half a dozen times per year. Legal age doesn’t bother us a bit TBH, but when our boys were younger they only got a sip. Once they hit their mid teen years they could choose what they wanted. Two of mine are of legal drinking age now and the third is months away. All three have kept with our family “tradition” by their own choice.
None of us do illegal drugs or smoke cigarettes. They don’t appeal to us health-wise. Neither does alcohol in excess.
My of-age college senior drinks only a little and only occasionally. It’s a nice change since he is there only by the grace and mercy of the college president who took pity on him. He ended up with four alcohol incidents by January of freshman year.
W went to college with a fake ID and drank quite a bit. I am a few years older and went when it was legal, drinking large quantities. I am naturally not very social but would perk up considerably with alcohol. We still drink, but maybe 3 or 4 per week.
D, on the other hand, has never had more than a sip and, as a college junior, has still not been to a party. We will see what happens this year.
“From my perspective, it does not appear that way to me. 7-8 drinks would put me in the hospital.”
Amen, sister. I couldn’t even physically drink 7-8 glasses of water in a short time, much less another beverage.
Moderate drinking to me? To me (a mostly non drinker) I would say it is a glass of wine or one mixed drink, enjoyed over a period of time (like a dinner), once a week.
I have had days on vacations where I have had 7 drinks. Two or three between noon and dinner, a couple at dinner and a couple after dinner and before midnight. It is amount consumed over time. There is no way I could consume that in 2 to 3 hours but over twelve hours…sure.
In my day in Wisconsin the legal age for beer was 18, they then changed it to all alcohol at 18 (Vietnam war era). Then came the Federal laws for 21- tied to money for states. I never have liked beer so I went to the beer bars with kids from the dorm freshman year and had less than a third of a glass from the pitchers. My friends later and I were not into drinking- we did go out for drinks to celebrate a friend’s birthday once as seniors. Perhaps the taste, my tight budget and an alcoholic father influenced me. I had my first mixed drink at a pool employee’s private party when I was 17 as I recall. Some of the people were of legal age and parents were gone. Alcohol was illegal at the football stadium but I also recall in the student section freshman year people would call out “mix” instead of Coke to go with their hidden wineskin rum. Back in my day I also recall some kids in my dorm refusing to share their brownies with me knowing I was not a marijuana user.
Fast forward to son’s era. Thank goodness for the 21 year old law because he was still 17 the fall of freshman year in college. We knew he didn’t have a “virgin liver” when we offered him a New Year’s eve champagne because he certainly handled it well. Wisconsin is (unfortunately) known for drinking so I was not at all shocked that he would have tasted alcohol. I do recall his telling us about running past some pregame drinkers and declining their invitation to imbibe.
Son is past college days now and has known friends who did home beer brewing. He also seems to know craft beers as well. College students experiment with a lot of things. What we parents don’t know is probably best. As long as it does not interfere with the academics or other aspects of life underage drinking is not horrific- especially when there was a time it was legal for the college aged students.
btw- as an anesthesiologist I really knew differences on local alcohol consumption practices. Alcohol use revs up the liver and you could tell how by how much of the anesthesia drugs were needed. Also, when questioning patients beforehand one would ask how many cases, not beers, to get a more accurate estimate in different areas.
I was practically a teetoler in HS and most of undergrad due to growing up in a formerly working-class NYC neighborhood with a heavy visible presence of drug and alcohol addicts.
For that reason, imbibing alcohol was strongly associated with those addicts until I was well into undergrad during the mid-late '90s. Ironically, the few times I did drink in my last two years in college were at a couple of dorm parties.
Also, was offered several opportunities to imbibe while visiting Profs’ homes as a student…including an offer of a Maotai. Too bad it always coincided with an exam the following morning so I had to refuse.
Another thing was back when I was an undergrad and even now…I preferred parties which had copious quantities of food on the offering…especially heavy on the meat(burgers, steaks, pork chops, chicken, etc.)
Funny part is I drink much more now than I did in undergrad and even then, it’s only occasionally during social/music events with friends. One piece of advice from parents and friends which I almost always follow is to eat a full dinner before the drinks*.
Just last night, after servicing a music venue’s computer systems and getting paid, got served 6 drinks on the house courtesy of the owners. 2 beers, 3 Hennesseys with ginger ale, and a jim beam with coke. While feeling slightly buzzed, still had no issues navigating my way home on a long subway ride from Brooklyn alone. Even managed to help a gratified tourist with coherent subway directions to his hotel area at 2 am. 
- The one time I drank on an empty stomach, I ended up getting the munchies so badly that I ended up eating an entire pizza pie. Most frustrating thing was remembering how much I paid for it and that I ate it....but not remembering savoring the flavors. :(
I drank on college. It was legal.
My 22 yo doesn’t drink much at all, and he’s simply not interested. My 20 yo drank some in HS (caught him BC he was “praying to the porcelain goddess” one night.
He also drank some in college, but now he’s become very into working out and doesn’t drink.
What I told both of my guys is that IF they are going to drink or do drugs, DONT drive, and don’t get In a car with someon else who has.
I started drinking at the very end of my senior year in high school. I drank and partied in college a good bit. I pretty stopped drinking and going to clubs when I hit 30. I’m now 53 and average one or two drinks a month. My son did not drink in high school. I know for a fact he drinks in college even though he is underage (just turned 20). My advice to him was I can’t control his life but if he is going to drink he has to be responsible. No drinking and driving and either let a sober person bring him home or use his credit card for uber/lyft. His school provides buses that takes students too downtown Austin to party on the weekends.
Drinking age was 18 when I was in high school. We all started going to bars at 16. I drank in college too - even though in Colorado age was 21 except for 3.2 beer. Everyone just had fake id’s. Not only did we drink but we took drugs, too. Only thing I didn’t do was smoke pot. I gave that up as the pot in Colo was just way to potent then what I had been used to.
We offered S wine at home from about age 15 and let him drink at weddings, bar mitzvah’s. He drank in college - they even had a nice little bar in his room soph year. He didn’t have a fake ID because he is very frugal and he said they were too expensive. I have no idea if he did drugs at all - but he did great in school and got a great job upon graduating so.
He lives in Boston now and everyone takes uber or the T so drinking and driving not an issue at all.
@Pizzagirl @MotherOfDragons I’ve had the thought that are very different standards of moderation.
Mine is like @Pizzagirl "Moderate drinking to me? To me (a mostly non drinker) I would say it is a glass of wine or one mixed drink, enjoyed over a period of time (like a dinner), once a week. "
One drink / ONCE A WEEK being the key here for me. However I’ve been a complete teetotaler for 2 years now. I got into a one glass of wine or beer a night habit in my 40s and that was way, way too much. Rather than fight my habit, and the craving for a drink to relax that come with it, I went cold turkey when I turned 50. I find it to be a social wet-rag, but oh well, I’m healthier.
I don’t get the “social wet-rag.” The people who need everyone else to be drinking, too, are the ones with the problem.