<p>Her field is engineering. I imagine her writing is of a technical nature.</p>
<p>DeskPotato, what did you Google? I’d like to read that description. </p>
<p>And also, odds are if you found a story like that, some bored, creative high school kid could have found it as well and crafted a story about it. </p>
<p>In my opinion, the OP has done no advice-seeking at all. She’s merely defended her harsh outlook on life and makes small, musing comments in response to our jeers that does nothing for her case. And also, she’s had ample opportunity to prove that her story is real, be it through presented emotions, desperate attempt to get some advice, etc. </p>
<p>The way I look at it, someone “that smart” would know how to effectively pitch their case. And if this person IS real, then shame on them for being so vague and unbelievable and not even having the honor to set things right.</p>
<p>She is under no obligation on an anonymous message board to give us sufficient information to verify her claims. However, if she came here to ask a question, I believe it’s been answered. Most people think she would not be doing the right thing if she proceeds as planned.</p>
<p>That could be true. </p>
<p>Maybe our opinion of her decision blurs our judgement.</p>
<p>I am so very much hoping you are a ■■■■■. Desk Potato thinks perhaps not. In the event you are not…</p>
<p>Your daughter has not even started high school yet. Raw intelligence and a high SAT along with athletic ability NOW does not equate to a free appropriate education for her when she graduates high school. You’re young, this is your first (only) child so I’ll give you the fact that you haven’t gone through some of the experiences some of us ‘ancient’ parents who have been through this a few times have. You might do well to take note of a few things to keep in mind. It’s already been noted that the sheer nature of scholarships are changing, drastically, year to year. When my 2011 grad was looking into schools his Jr year there were several merit schools on his list. By June when their updated merit offerings were listed many, many went from tuition/room/board to tuition only. That seemed to be the shifting year. Now, as mentioned some NMF programs that have always been full ride (tuition/room/board/often study abroad) are cutting back to tuition only and maybe 1 year R&B. Expect this to continue to change. Merit schools my 2011 grad looked at have increased their necessary stats and lowered the benefits heading into application season for my 2014 grad. If your student receives a full tuition scholarship leaving room/board/books/travel at a school like Alabama this is going to run about $15k/year without travel (at today’s rates). Add travel and you may do just as well as your state flagship. That’s where automatic merit is moving.</p>
<p>Your student is not a constant variable either academically or athletically.</p>
<p>Athletically I’ll cover very quickly because it’s really very simple. Your student can sustain an injury that either ends their career or takes them out of play long enough that their skills don’t continue to progress to an elite level. They can have repeated injuries that make continued participation harmful to their health overall. At some point in their development physically their body may just not be optimally suited for their sport. At some point in their progression in their sport they may simply max out in their ability. Their are great athletes and then there are truly elite athletes. What you see developmentally at 13 is potential, not the finished result. </p>
<p>Academically your student shows promise and that’s excellent. Many, many things can happen in high school. They can be straight As through 10th grade until APs start in Jr year. All of a sudden they have 4APs, a demanding sport, hours and hours of hw, and there’s just not enough time in the day. A few B+'s start to creep in, maybe a B or 2 (gasp). This absolutely isn’t the end of the world, but your D is not infallible. She is human. She may come down with the flu and miss 3 weeks of school spring of Jr year (absolutely can and does happen). This takes a major toll on her physically, emotionally, her grades take a hit. It’s spring when she’s trying to study for AP test, SAT Subject tests, etc. It’s the perfect storm and I have seen it happen. There are also students who are exceptionally bright who are not diagnosed with learning differences until high school because they have been able to compensate as they are also very gifted. When they are overwhelmed with seven different subjects at once, etc. this can often come out. You can’t anticipate this. Students can suffer from depression which takes a toll on their grades and ECs. Often rigor and ECs are cut back while the student is in recovery. As you well know there are unintended pregnancies that can throw a monkey wrench in plans. </p>
<p>Does it feel like I’m throwing everything and the kitchen sink at you?!?! You bet!! That is because there is absolutely no possible way you can predict what is going to happen and what the future holds for your daughter in the next four years of her life. Planning for your daughter like this is next fall and everything is presupposed, predetermined, is immature and shortsighted.</p>
<p>I absolutely wish your daughter the very best in her high school career, both academically and athletically. I do know that high school is often messy, unpredictable, and where you end up at 18 is absolutely not where you thought you would when you started at 13. Not allowing your daughter the freedom of her own path, that freedom of growth and destiny is a very confining thing.</p>
<p>Google can be quite interesting. I did find a MIT graduate whose story really matches up to the OP - but who knows. If the OP’s story is true - I hope she is reading these responses and re-thinking her position.</p>
<p>I read the article and I don’t think it really matches up with the OP. </p>
<p>[MIT</a> for Two - MIT News Office](<a href=“http://web.mit.edu/newsoffice/2011/cadena-profile-commencement-0603.html]MIT”>MIT for Two | MIT News | Massachusetts Institute of Technology)</p>
<p>That’s an awesome story, and there is no way that woman would not pay for her daughter to go to college.</p>
<p>emilybee, thanks–that is an amazing story. There are far more wonderful people in the world than we think.</p>
<p>OK OP, this is the standard your story has to beat. Get cracking! We demand our next fix of interestingness! :D</p>
<p>How did you find the MIT story? The only thing I’m wondering is that OP claims degrees from two prestigious universities, and Noramay in the article got her degrees exclusively from MIT.</p>
<p>Personally, I think it’s unfair to make it an expectation that parents will pay for college, especially in circumstatnces where it makes them work a stressful job or doesn’t allow them to retire at the time they planned or achieve their dreams. I haven’t read the whole thread, but I don’t think the OP’s priorities are unreasonable, and I feel people are ‘shaming’ her for no reason. I don’t think it’s a bad decision.</p>
<p>Personally, I don’t think that anyone with a college aged child has a “right” to retire (absent very serious medical problems) before the age of 65 or when the child reaches age 22, whichever comes first. If the OP is really not a ■■■■■ then she is really abandoning her responsibilities while her daughter is still a child.</p>
<p>Note: even if the OP’s story perfectly matches the facts of a real person, that doesn’t mean that the OP is that person.</p>
<p>If that really is her, I’d feel bad for cracking her identity… </p>
<p>I know I complained that she didn’t give us enough believable info, but I meant it as more of emotionally or humanly believable info, such as getting mad at us for questioning her, actually considering other viewpoints, either giving up her views or amending them to make them better, etc. I didn’t mean for her to be all like “HEY, I live here, went there, and my daughter goes here.” I just wanted more substance for such a big issue, because to me, she had a rather apathetic attitude. (I know engineers are supposed to be bland, but that bland? That’s what I was tripped up over. And I assumed she meant like a writer-writer, which would clash with her story) </p>
<p>So if it really is that lady, I feel bad that she now has to make a new account. And if it’s not, they’ve really got us whirling on this one.</p>
<p>Well I’ve had enough. Thank you to those who offered best wishes and helpful advice either on this thread or by private message. The interesting thing is, my friends’ opposition to my plan did not stem from the notion that I should feel obligated to pay for DD’s college experience, which seems to be the consensus here, but rather that it is unfair that DD won’t get the opportunity to go to top schools like I did. As I said, I firmly believe that a student can get a great education practically anywhere, so I am not troubled by such concerns. Fortunately for me, DD is on board with the plan, is willing to play the game, and I understand how the game is played so that I can provide her with the necessary guidance. While I may have opted to attend schools that did not provide merit scholarships, I had a number of full ride purely merit offers. There may be fewer merit scholarships available now, but the rules of the game have not changed. Had my daughter not had the ability to put her in contention for a full ride somewhere, I would not have even considered my current plan. I am not a selfish person. And DD does not think that I am. What selfish person is willing to give up a lucrative career to serve the less fortunate for minimal pay? No one that I know of. DD is happy for the opportunities I have been able to provide. Moreover, it is not as if she is being cut off at 18. Getting a full ride is actually to her benefit in terms of what I will be able to help her with financially during the college years.</p>
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<p>Narcissists in search of public accolades.</p>
<p>Aw, don’t go away. Some of us like baloney.</p>
<p>Chassitty Saldana was born in 1998. That would put her in 9th grade now. </p>
<p>Her mom didn’t go to two different schools, just one. </p>
<p>I don’t think Noramy is getting rich working for Boeing.</p>
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<p>I’m confused, was this just a slip (i.e. past tense, already happened)? As she is just starting hs I would think this would read…If my daughter didn’t have the ability to be in contention for a full ride…</p>
<p>I’m sincerely not trying to be picky, but honestly just asking for clarification.</p>
<p>I’d be very upset if I were publicly ousted on CC. I don’t think it’s in the cc spirit to do so. JMHO.</p>
<p>It’s early yet for the OP and her DD. See what time does to these plans. My brother had his kids late and had all kinds of opinions on how we should and shouldn’t be spending money on our kids and what he would do. A whole other story when his kids came of age.</p>