Dorm Disappointments

<p>Our prayers to the families--I hope that the rectors will at least have meetings in each of the dorms to help students in coping with these losses. However, I know that some rectors are better than others at knowing the students in the dorms. Again, such a sad and difficult time for the families.</p>

<p>Up-to-date info is at the blog of ND's Catholic student paper:</p>

<p>The</a> Irish Rover</p>

<p>^^^ appreciate that link NDIrish08- such heartbreak</p>

<p>My son graduated form ND in '06 and my daughter is a sophomore there now. As far as sex in dorms etc, I know of several students who were kicked out of the dorm for having a member of the opposite sex in their room past hours. If a student has a roommate who is constantly drunk and "hooking up" to the point that it is a problem, it sounds like the roommates need to handle it between themselves, or with the help of one of the assistant RA's.
As far as some other points raised, I do feel that ND has lost touch with the middle class, and my son and daughter were/are amazed at the wealth of some of the kids there. That being said, I'm glad that my kids picked ND, and that we were able to find a way to send them there.</p>

<p>I am the aunt of a freshman at ND as well as an alum from a big ND family. I think the OPs post is, unfortunately spot on. I look at my sister and family struggle and sacrifice to pay big bucks to ND (they are that "lucky" group that doesn't qualify for much aid but also isn't rolling in it" only to hear things like this. It's frustrating. I know it's a reality but when you are sacrificing to have your child there, and then you hear about free sex, drinking beyond oblivion and the University turning a blind eye to it, it is upsetting. At ND, you expect more. We all think that our kids who attend ND are super special; not the run of the mill college kid and then they act like.....well......typical college kids. I don't know what the answer is other than the campus is big enough to find some kids with things in common and hopefully gravitate to that.</p>

<p>Glad to hear your thoughts^! Great Post!</p>

<p>do the girls' dorms have similar issues or are they quieter than the guys'?</p>

<p>There are no parties allowed in women's dorms. So in general yes they are quieter. And the "quietness" of a men's dorm really depends on the guys in your section. Right now it is dead silent in our hallway. I walked by Zahm earlier and it was making quite a bit of noise but nothing outrageous. So it depends. Women's dorms are nicer and quieter though.</p>

<p>I must refute the statement that "no parties allowed in women's dorms." They are possible, but a special form must be filled out, and, in general, are much rarer and the rules are much stricter. However, I know for a fact that many of my friends pregame in their dorm before they get come over here.</p>

<p>However, I must also agree that women's dorms are much quieter and more peaceful.</p>

<p>Another Morrissey mom here. Our son is also a freshman and is quite happy there. He and Fr. V. have had several very good conversations and we are very pleased that Fr. V. runs a tight ship. To anyone who complains about how strict he is, I would just say: "This is suppposed to be a Catholic University. As Fr. V. put it during orientation, he is there to guide these young men and to help them develop into responsible individuals. If some of them can't handle the rules, then he helps straighten them out." </p>

<p>We have other concerns about Notre Dame, but our son's dorm is not one of them.</p>

<p>^^^ welcome MomofNDgrad, glad you are sharing :)</p>

<p>momofNDgrad- would you care to share some of your other concerns about ND? I would really appreciate it.</p>

<p>Yes, could you please share your thoughts on ND. I am still not sure if I will attend.
Thanks</p>

<p>MomofNDgrad--don't want to jump on the bandwagon, as it seems that you are being bombarded-BUT, I wish there were more Father V's in the dorms. Sounds like he is on the ball and knows the students as well as the parents. I don't understand the purpose of the Rectors in the dorms, esp if they don't even know all of the students. I suppose, on the other hand, that some students would not want the strictness of Morrissey. But, it is also their choice to move. Thanks for sharing--please share more!!</p>

<p>"We all think that our kids who attend ND are super special"</p>

<p>To be fair, most of us (the students) think we are pretty normal.</p>

<p>I am back with a slightly different user name. (It was MomofNDgrad) I was attempting to change my password and got locked out. A computer person, I am not.</p>

<p>MomsaWreck, sent you a message. I'll try to summarize here.</p>

<p>My husband is an alum, one son graduated in '06, and one is the freshman in Morrissey (we also have 3 other sons who attended other schools, so the college thing is nothing new to us.)</p>

<p>There are many good things about ND. Our older son met many people who will be lifelong friends, he had countless opportunities for new learning experiences while he was in school, unanticipated career options were available to him because of his Notre Dame education, and most importantly, the Mass and Sacraments were always available. </p>

<p>Our younger son is dong fine, too, although disappointed and disenchanted with some of the things he has encountered there.</p>

<p>Our primary concern is with the so-called 'Catholic' identity of Notre Dame. The Theology Dept. is notoriously liberal and many faculty members are not Catholic. Should not following the teachings of the Church be an important aspect of a Catholic university? If we are to be Christ to the world, what is wrong with acting like it? I recognize that many non-Catholics attend Notre Dame and that is fine, but, I just want people who are serious about their Catholic faith to realize that you may not find things to be quite as you expected at ND, especially if you are looking for a truly orthodox atmosphere.</p>

<p>Just my 2 cents worth. I'll try to answer specific questions if I can.</p>

<p>Momsawreck-
I would also be happy to answer your concerns, if you are interested in hearing a viewpoint of mother of a sophomore son, engineering major, non- catholic.
Overall, S LOVES ND, and his experiences have been stellar, especially the boys he met, two of whom visited us this summer in NJ.</p>

<p>It is a wonderful school, IMHO......and, he has no regrets about his decision at all, and he could have attended every other school he applied to, even a full academic scholarship to The College Of NJ, back when the state had funds for the top applicants. </p>

<p>It is cold there- guess no place is perfect :)</p>

<p>^^^Momofgrad, I bow to you immense experience as college parent- and, especially ND expert- your husband, one son graduated, one son a current student. AND THREE OTHERS atttended other schools- you could write "the" book.
I just wanted to let Momawreck know I would be happy to answer any questions, from the standpoint of a non-catholic at ND if she is interested.</p>

<p>No, I couldn't write the book. All of our sons have had different experiences, and, if we had five more, I'm sure the same would be true. :)</p>

<p>I love ND, too...... but I just believe it could be better than it is right now.</p>

<p>I am the parent of a non-Catholic sophomore! I have to agree in some respects with Momof06grad; HOWEVER, no one has EVER approached son about his faith, encouraged him to attend a mass, etc. I was expecting that there would be more emphasis on religion (of which I certainly do not mind!), but I have to honestly say, after two years of inquiring of son, that I am quite surprised by this. Yes, he knew and so did we, that it was a Catholic university. One parent was raised as a Catholic, other parent, protestant. Son was raised protestant--with some Catholic undertones. Neither of us have concerns over whether he may choose to become catholic. I am, however, surprised that there does not seem to be the "Catholic" identity that we thought would exist on campus. Maybe I, as a parent, thought or expected too much? Or perhaps, son is considered a "lost cause" because he was not already Catholic? But, I will be the first to tell you that son chose ND, not because of its Catholic identity, as so many are quick to assume. He chose the university because of its challenging academics, its national and even international recognition for job ops, and I suppose (but haven't asked him), the fact that it is a somewhat safe campus with such a great community feel. He is happy--yes, cold (!) and overworked at times. So, while my reasons for agreeing about the Catholic identity may be totally different than Momof06grad, I see the identity issue a little differently. I will apologize up front if my post offends anyone--it is not my intention. Just thoughts of our experiences for the first 2 years at ND. Perhaps other non-catholics have differing opinions--I am sure that ours is not the only opinion.</p>