Question about social scene/fitting in

<p>Hi everyone,
I'm a freshman at Lafayette College and I'm thinking about transferring to Notre Dame for my sophomore year. I don't drink, and at my school there's a huge culture of it since we have frats and there's not much else ever going on. I don't try to avoid people that do drink, and I know it happens everywhere, including ND. What I want to know is how important it seems to be to most people there. At Lafayette, it seems like so many people just live for the next time they can get wasted, and I feel like I've been isolated by everyone else because I don't have that mentality. I know if I transfer to ND I'll be exposed to the drinking, I'm not looking to hide in my room all the time and not have fun; on the contrary, I want to make lasting friendships and have a lot of good times. I just want to know how focused people seem to be on it in general...can I transfer there and still fit in, both with people who do drink and people who don't?</p>

<p>Thanks!</p>

<p>It will be the same.</p>

<p>Plus snow.</p>

<p>Well ND doesn't have fraternities, but the dorms basically function as such. They just don't exclude people--everyone gets one if they want.</p>

<p>ND has very little to do as well. South Bend does not have a reputation as a cultural hot spot. If you are into sports, you will fit in well, as ND is a big IM school and also has great club sports.</p>

<p>Drinking is the center of most people's social life at ND from everything I've heard. I'm sure you can find people who don't drink though.</p>

<p>What do you expect from a school whose mascot is the Fighting Irish?</p>

<p>I don't drink (no bad experiences but frankly it's not healthy, it doesn't taste good and it's expensive). My roommates always offer just because that's what roommates are supposed to do, but they never give me **** for not wanting to have a little captain on a Wednesday night.</p>

<p>I know plenty of people here who do not drink... of course, you will encounter some who drink every night, others that only drink on the weekends... but there are other things to do... certainly, south bend is boring, but ND offers activities all the time including various intramural sports, club sports and of course, non-sport related activities...student government is popular here</p>

<p>thanks for the responses!</p>

<p>I'm trying to be a realist, I know that its gonna be there and its gonna be big. I wouldn't have a problem making friends with people who do or hanging out with them sometimes when they are. I've just found at Lafayette theres a general lack of enthusiasm for almost everything else besides partying, and I think I'd be much better off in a place where drinking isn't the be-all end-all thing it is here.</p>

<p>Do you think I can find that at ND?</p>

<p>If you think there is nothing to do besides drink at Lafayette, within an hour of NYC, then you will find absolutely nothing to do but drink on Notre Dame's campus. </p>

<p>Join a club! TAke up a sport. Become a poet. If drinking is actually the problem with Lafayette and not some other issue, look harder for companions of like mind. I've been to Lafayette and ND - you don't have to be a frat rat at LC if you don't want to be. However, if you live on campus at ND, the loneranger is right - dorms there do function as frats. </p>

<p>Is drinking really the problem? If it is and you really want to transfer, perhaps you might want to consider Grove City, Calvin, Brigham Young, Bob Jones.... lots of other schools where alcohol is not pervasive on campus.</p>

<p>fencersmother,</p>

<p>ive actually done more to fit in than you might think. I played tennis in high school and tried to join the club team at lafayette, but it was so disorganized it fell apart within the first month. I'm part of the Catholic group on campus, which in a lot of ways is the best thing I have going for me there, but its such a small and unpopular group that I've already become friendly with the few people that attend regularly (who are mostly upperclassmen who are nice enough but are already established in their own scene.) In everything I've tried so far there seems to be a lack of enthusiasm, and I believe that wouldn't be the case at ND.</p>

<p>I know it doesn't come easy, and that I have to step ouside my comfort zone no matter where I am. I just honestly believe it shouldn't be this tough for me to be comfortable in general with my surroundings.</p>

<p>I was in a frat at my school prior to transferring to ND and the dorms are nothing like frats. yes, you live in a building with whole bunch of people who are the same sex, but that is pretty much it. you have more privacy than living in a frat house and there will be plenty of people like you who do not want to drink....in a frat, drinking is forced and expected; in the dorms, it is neither forced nor expected... for the most part, most of the people i lived with didnt drink that much - only on the weekends. People still understand they are at ND and understand what is expected of them to do well in their classes; I have met only one person here who has put drinking before studies and he dropped out</p>