Down With Collegeboard and their Nefarious Delays - The Scholar's Rebellion

Test Preparation
1

<p>Hear me my fellow comrades!</p>

<p>I am sure a sizable number of you scholars are aware of the tragic and unanticipated event that has occurred today: College Board, the "nonprofit" association that claims supremacy on administering standardized tests, has delayed (yes, I repeated, delayed) our cherished SAT I reasoning and SAT II Subject test scores (from May 26th to 28th).</p>

<p>This is not the first time for College Board to employ such egregious, dilatory tactics:the</a> SAT scores of 2006 were delayed as well due to "technical errors".</p>

<p>Have we not had enough of College Board's overt incompetence and downright avarice? How long are we, the praised scholars of the New Age, going to stand by without taking action against this greedy, erroneous, and unsatisfactory "nonprofit" organization? College Board has stripped you - no, us - of our precious money, our patriotic Americanism, our testing morality, our unstressed academic days, and now - they have stripped us of our satisfaction of witnessing the release of our invaluable test scores. Indeed, College Board has demonstrated a profound arrogance towards test takers: they think they can constantly toy with us like pawns in a chess game and get away with it..</p>

<p>Scholars, I know how you feel right now - it may not seem like it, but I, Sir Mordred, second son of the Arthurian throne, know that feeling. Yes, it is the feeling of despair stemming from delay - from the delay of being rescued from the current economic recession, from the delay of promised pleasure from your beloved lover, from the delay of waiting for a rollercoaster Kingda Ka ride when you are strapped in (strapped in!), and now, from the delay of College Board's release of test scores.</p>

<p>It is time to say it, to say something that we the scholars have never had the courage to say before: we've had enough. Yes, we've had enough of the nefarious behavior of College Board. We will tolerate no more "delays" - no more derision! The time to take action is now.</p>

<p>Before we advance our hatred even further, you should know your enemy. To blame the entire College Board organization is wrong. Yes, it is not the entirety that is wrong, but rather the single individual that commands this dominion of dilatory tactics: Gaston</a> Caperton. Caperton is the man behind these "delays" and "technological errors". The despotic dictator is responsible for hundreds of thousands of stressed students. Caperton is the reason we are not able to sleep soundly in bed at night, Caperton is the reason why we will not have the opportunity to witness our test scores on May 26th, 2011. It was not you that was wrong, it was Caperton!</p>

<p>It is time to take action. Take up your sword, fight for justice! We have had enough of the authoritarian rule of Gaston Caperton. In response, me and notable comrades have organized a nonviolent rebellion to express our dissent and hatred at the dictator. The rebellion - which will now be known as the Scholar's Rebellion - will take place in the Upper West Side of Manhattan, NYC, at the College Board headquarters. Yes, I will be taking the American Airlines from the San Francisco International Airport to arrive at New York City. You should be there too. Stand with us, side by side, and fight for justice!</p>

<p>I shall fight - we shall fight - against the injustice and dilatory tactics of Gaston Caperton. From this moment on, the Scholar's Rebellion will become a reality. Down with College Board, down the dictator that is Gaston Caperton.</p>

<p>-Sir Mordred</p>

2

<p>I completely agree. We should take action against this dictator. I say no one should take the CollegeBoard’s tests so eventually they will cease to exist.</p>

3

<p>Down with collegeboard.</p>

4

<p>Change your tampon, Mordred.
It sucks. They suck. It all sucks. But everyone knows that collegeboard does this regardless. Why do you think the ACTs are more popular these past 2 years?
Besides, be aware that in the contract the release dates are “estimated.” There have been years where certain graders marked all the essays with score of one, and sabotaged paranoid students. </p>

<p>But you’ll be fine for another 2 days. If you really feel like fighting the man, find a good reason and wield. What sway will anxious students have on a private company, regardless of the situation.</p>

5

<p>^ He is joking …</p>

6

<p>What disgusts me is that they dare call themselves a not-for-profit…</p>

<p>And what’s the deal with delays? Scores should take 5 minutes to get. 1 minute to scan the MC and 2 minutes for each essay reader, and that’s being generous. What are they doing with our tests for 30 days??</p>

7

<p>It’s only 36 more hours. Chill</p>

8

<p>Fantastic satire! I literally just made an account to tell you that.
Nonetheless, I am not worried about the SAT scores being late. What can we do? It’s not like they are trying to spite us with the delay. Those complaining about it are more or less immature, even with the fact that the delay was not announced beforehand nor was an email sent out.</p>

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<p>Wow! How upset would you get if they were 3 days late? So which do you want? Should I take up my sword, or engage in nonviolent protest?</p>

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<p>Where does all of this money go if it isn’t profit…? They can’t possibly use it all in day-to-day operations and materials…</p>

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<p>@TheForbes “Gaston Caperton, president of the College Board, had earnings in the year ended June 2010 of $1.27 million, of which $509,000 was deferred compensation, according to a filing. He also got an estimated $45,500 from the company and related organizations. The College Board reported total revenue of $659.8 million in the period.”
Yeeeaah… Get it?</p>

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<p>I hate Collegeboard- Colleges should just make their own standardized tests or the government should</p>

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<p>I wasn’t sure if OP was joking or not until I read the Arthurian references… Then I just really hoped he/she was joking, lol.</p>

<p>Very nice, had me going for a while.</p>

14

<p>Both times I took subject tests, the scores were very delayed. As a graduating senior, I agree to take no more SATs.</p>

15

<p>anybody got their scores yet?</p>

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<p>@ Above - Lots of people, considering the level of activity in the appropriate threads. They’re all online scores, I’m guessing. </p>

<p>That rant reminds me a lot of those random rant generators. I feel like the OP just took one of those and then edited sentences to be more relevant. Am I right?</p>

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<p>^No, of course not; all my ranting speeches are of true value and I would never employ a “random rant generator” to construct artificial speeches. However, the thread has lost meaning. I arrived in Manhattan today through my American Airlines flight and only three people showed up for the rebellion. We were forced to retreat back to our homeland states.</p>

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<p>^ imagine if you really convinced a poor little kid to break his piggy bank for a “rebellion” that will never receive sufficient to ignite a controversy that will end education once in for all. Then, we will have to rely on natural selection to determine who gets to be the alpha-male of an Andrew Carnegie-like monopoly. Alas, salvation will be no more, and the “beginning” will finally come to an end.</p>

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<p>Let this thread be a firm reminder to CollegeBoard officials: if they (again) delay our beloved testing scores tomorrow, we shall revolt!</p>

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<p>omg i was so scared… i thought he was saying the june scores were delayed -_-</p>