<p>I always get this fear whenever I leave for college, especially since I'm an international student and I don't get to meet my family for up to 9 months. Is it just me or do others feel the same way too? The fear gets pretty severe and stressful in my case, maybe because I've always been the overly sensitive type. I need advice.</p>
<p>Yep I feel like this when I am away from my family. I got it first when I was little and would go to camp and again when I left for college 2 years ago. Now I'm spending a year abroad and I have it again , I'm glad you posted this because I always assumed it was just me!</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~Phobia</p>
<p>Your sensitivity may be based on your love for your family, and the healthy realization that life can be, at times, fleeting and ephemeral. Probably that is a good thing, as it leads you to value deeply your loved ones. Taken to extremes, it can become obsessive. Perhaps you could become involved in a spiritual group in your campus for comfort. And, of course if you can email or call regularly, that will go far in alleving your worries. Or just letter writing--so you can express your affection and concern. Just realize that your family is proud of your education quest and would not want you to forgo it for them.</p>
<p>When I was a child, I would get worried whenever my dad came home from work late or whenever my mom complained of a headache. I would get morbid ideas like maybe my dad got into a motor accident or my mom had a brain tumor. So I used to pray a lot, and prayers really did help. However, I'm afraid the education I've received over the years has distanced me from religion, made me less confident in the existence of someone to pray to. My secularity makes me lost whenever I face problems like this. I do not have anyone to turn to. As ironic as this may sound, I'm praying desperately to regain my faith. Life without religion hurts.</p>
<p>I do talk to my family often, but it's still very different from seeing them in the flesh. I feel as if they're not as safe as they would be with me around, which is unwarranted thinking but I cannot help it.</p>
<p>So I try to occupy myself with work and friends to get my mind off pessimism like this. It works, but not all the time.</p>
<p>I don't know why but I have some of those thoughts too....
I thought it was just me...
I'll forget about it every now and then but they just seem to randomly pop up for some reason...</p>
<p>You've got to realize that your fears are irrational and that you have to stop thinking about things like that.</p>
<p>my dog died towards the beginning of my freshman year, and my other dog's pretty old, so I'm usually pretty worried about him dying too.</p>
<p>fear of loved ones dying doesn't sound irrational to me, but you are overdoing it a bit I suppose; although we can all die at any time, its no more likely to happen while you're in college and, if your parents are in good health, just try not to worry. You can always come home if some major health crises arises.</p>
<p>i don't think its too healthy to dwell on it.</p>
<p>it will just make you depressed and maybe a little soft.</p>
<p>well, even if it does happen, you couldn't have done anything to prevent it. just keep in touch with them regularly to check in.</p>
<p>An irrational fear of the death of loved ones could be indicative of OCD. You might want to look into it.</p>
<p>What I try to do is to turn my fears into something more positive. So, if I am (irrationally) fearing a family member will die, I meditate/pray/ (or whatever you do) and give thanks for the good health of that individual and for all of the time I have been blessed to share with them. It is hard to feel fear and be grateful at the same time. It takes practice but it works. It is a matter of spiritual and mental self discipline. Anyways, you are probably just missing your family and worried about the length of time until you see them again and then your mind goes to the "What ifs." If it starts to bother you a lot, see a counselor at the health center for some tips on how to change the script in your head. therapy is worth an hour or so of your time if the worry fades away. Good luck.</p>
<p>ask yourself exactly what good worrying does</p>
<p>I had this fear constantly, and my mother actually died (although I was living at home and right there when it happened). She had been suffering from a terminal illness for some time and I knew it was a good possibility she might die while I was away at college. I didn't want to be thousands of miles away from her if something happened, so I decided to attend the college right around the corner of my home. She died the first semester of my senior year, a few days before Christmas. I was so devastated, I had to take a semester off.</p>
<p>The truth of the matter is, there is always a chance something unexpected may happen at any time. That's life. But you shouldn't let that paralyze you. I certainly can understand where you are coming from though. Best of wishes.</p>
<p>hey gil, i think i understand your situation very well.</p>
<p>though i am not an international student like you are, but i am originally from another country in which i have most of my friends and family members.</p>
<p>my girlfriend still lives and goes to school there. she just started college like i do this fall. for the first time she's away from her parents and home which is thousands of miles far. and what i worry the most is the special allergy she has. she is allergic to dairy of any kind, i mean, a drop of milk spattering on her skin would literally end her up in the hospital, to say nothing of taking it accidentally.</p>
<p>and what i feel helpless of is we probably would not see each other in a couple of years due to the heavy school work and the travel distance.</p>
<p>what i can do now is just call her regularly.</p>
<p>think positive, at least you know when you are going back and look forward to the reunion.</p>
<p>really, think positive.</p>
<p>the sensitivity will make you depressed. you are having it all good now!</p>
<p>Facebook..</p>
<p>When I was a child, I would get worried whenever my dad came home from work late or whenever my mom complained of a headache. I would get morbid ideas like maybe my dad got into a motor accident or my mom had a brain tumor. So I used to pray a lot, and prayers really did help. However, I'm afraid the education I've received over the years has distanced me from religion, made me less confident in the existence of someone to pray to. My secularity makes me lost whenever I face problems like this. I do not have anyone to turn to. As ironic as this may sound, I'm praying desperately to regain my faith. Life without religion hurts.</p>
<p>That's my position exactly.</p>