<p>Agree that this time of year is so stressful for seniors – they are realizing that they are really leaving. It hits that they are leaving friends, they worry about adapting to a new social world. And then they realize they are leaving HOME – as excited as they, they are often panicked about that as well. Throw in AP/IB, final projects etc, and they are a mess. I never knew “which” kid was going to walk through the door – the happy senior excited about his new life, or the nervous kid who clothed his worry in mouthiness. Hang in there, and help with the administrative tasks – list-maker that I am, I would have a timeline of “to dos” – show it to my son, get his approval and input and then take care of it myself. I sent one off to school who was poster child for the “my son it too immature to go to college” thread, and he has matured and turned into a (mostly) responsible young man. Picking up the slack when they are overwhelmed is something we can still do as parents, in my mind. </p>
<p>Good luck, and congrats to your kiddo. </p>
<p>My D is feeling this a year early then. She’s just a junior, but in the past two weeks the executive functions of her brain seem to have gone on vacation. Yesterday morning she almost missed a morning meeting because she put the time down wrong in her calendar. I told her dad to get her up anyway because she’s been “flighty” lately. She thought I said “lazy” (which she’s not) and went ballistic! When I clarified, “flighty not lazy,” all she said was “oh, okay then…sorry.” It’s going to be a rocky ride. </p>
<p>the last 24hrs have been brutal. absolute torture. the end is in sight. I almost feel like crying, and or having a cigarette! would it be inappropriate to have a shot of booz with my 18 yr old son when the cat is in the bag? </p>
<p>I don’t think there’s anything wrong with getting involved in their decisions at this age. You’re not preventing him from maturing, you’re just sharing the load. And kids today seem to have a lot more pressure than earlier generations did, with regard to the college application process. Now when either one of my kids seems overwhelmed, the first question I ask is “What activity can you drop?” Because sometimes, dropping something (a practice, a game, asking for an extension on a paper) is the right thing to do.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, as college seniors, this happens, too. “You need to apply to grad schools before you miss the deadline. You need to apply for jobs if you want to get one after graduation. You need to pick up your honor cords to wear at graduation. You need to pack up your room because we have to be out of there right after graduation.” Son has stated that we no longer need to treat him like a fourth grader, but yet, the grad school deadlines got missed, the jobs were not applied for, and we know we will have to start from scratch in packing up the dorm room in two hours, with no storage facility to dump the stuff in this year. It’s all coming home.</p>
<p>^Yeah, the problem is that when the kid doesn’t do what he’s supposed to, there can be major consequences for the rest of the family! My 19-year-old son got a job in Wisconsin this summer as a camp counselor. He bought his own airline ticket, but he still hasn’t returned the employment papers he received a week and a half ago! I kept my mouth shut as long as I could, then asked him about it a couple of times (“I would be glad to help if you need it”) with no response. I finally said (very calmly), “Well, if you don’t want the job, then don’t fill out the paperwork,” and he exploded, saying that’s what I do wrong - always tearing him down instead of building him up. So now I’m shutting up for good. But if he doesn’t get this in, I don’t think I can stand to have him hanging around here all summer. Ack.</p>
<p>Give him a break and do the work for him. You’re the one in the family who has the time, right? Help him figure out his few decisions left and then do the paperwork. He’s busy. Doing the secretarial work isn’t going to make a man out of him. Many of us moms do this without a second thought, though it’s a lot of work and a pain in the butt. If you’re the one with the time, you have to suck it up and take care of it, grueling as it is.</p>
<p>I agree with busdriver. If he has chosen a school, go ahead and handle the financial paperwork yourself.( I wanted to do it to make sure it was done correctly, anyway. ) The other things on your list can wait. This isn’t the time to make things difficult for your son to prove anything; its time to enjoy the last few weeks he’ll be living under your roof. He’ll be gone and all grown up in a heartbeat.</p>
<p>I think it is totally appropriate to have a celebration[ minus the booze] with your DS.
I’m sure HE will also be relieved, even if he does not show it. </p>
<p>oh he is. we just paid the deposit. he’s beaming …</p>
<p>OP - Hang in there. This too will pass 
And then next year you’ll be missing the kiddo. </p>
<p>congratulations!!! 
</p>
<p>Did you get your toast? :D/ </p>
<p>oh haha no, kinda of anticlimactic … waited all night for him to come home from work, then wife got in late, she had to use a new credit card for the deposit, cuz she already used her debt card that day and our max is $500 per day, then by time they figured out how to activate her card, and get the deposit made we were exhausted. there was some congratulations and revelations, etc. handshaking back patting, etc but no booze … BUT THANKS FOR ASKING!</p>