Just like the title says I am dealing with college depression.I’m in my second year in college, and with pressure from my parents and college its enough to make me crack from insanity. I don’t know how to fix it and the more I stay at college the more depressed I get. At times I feel like its a nightmare I’m living and reality is slowly slipping from my mentality. I can’t focus no matter how hard I try. My grades have gone from A’s to F’s in a matter of two quarters. This only adds to my stress because my GPA at the moment went from a 2.61 down to a 2.16. This quarter I’m dying in classes because at times I feel like its useless, and no matter how many times I try to motivate myself to continue forward the same result happens. I’ve become numb to parents and when they get pissed at me for doing nothing I can’t answer because in truth I don’t know what to do about them. I have goals and dreams but even those are starting to fade away with every quarter of classes I take. As a result of the depression skipping classes has also occurred, which I know is something that sounds stupid but after a mental breakdown the night before its not. After a breakdown which normally involves me crying my eyes out and waking up feeling totally blank the next day (blank meaning I won’t even remember the lecture given) I just feel dead at times so I head to the library and stay there for the whole day of classes. I don’t know who to talk to about this because I already did around a year of therapy but the same cycle continues every quarter where at times it can get as bad as I won’t eat because the stress and depression is making me feel sick.
Anyway any ideas to help will be great guys and girls…
I need the help …
You need to go to your school health center and ask for a referral for a psychiatric evaluation. Also try your school counseling center, and if one particular counselor doesn’t work for you, request a different one. If you are home on summer break, talk to your parents about the crisis state you are in, or get yourself to an emergency room. You need medical care for your mental health issues, now.
My daughter was suffering from depression at the end of the fall semester but after Christmas break, thought she could finish it out for spring, because she really wanted to be successful at it. It didn’t work out and after two trips to visit her 4 hours out of state, we went and withdrew her from school in late March. She would have been finished May 6.
Do not self medicate.If you get caught, it will open up a whole other can of worms you do not want. Stress wise or financially.
Please confide in your parents. You DO need help. Your parents need help on dealing with a child with depression. Many parents feel helpless because they can’t fix it and what skill set they have is not one for dealing with depression.
dealing with Depression is a multi layered process. It is not “take this pill and do X” and you are better. It involves you and your family. It is not impossible to overcome, though it may feel like it. Journaling is great. So is drawing/doodling and coloring. It won’t fix anything but it can relieve it because you are expressing, almost like releasing energy.
Going outside to walk is good. You have to do things you don’t feel like. Depression lies to you so it’s like you have the devil on one shoulder and the angel on the other. It is easy to listen to the devil more often but it is the angel who you need to listen too, as much as you hate her.
You need a safe place to fall. Your parents may not get that immediately. You may need to tell them what you need. As good as they are, they are human and don’t know everything at every given moment. Sometimes we get too caught up in trying to fix it, that we forget or just don’t know what it is that you need. Your a coming adult, not a child and we figure this out together. I will say that they do love you more than anyone and want the best for you more than anyone.
I wish you all the best. ((((Hugs)))) from a mom with a daughter who suffers from depression.
Just so you know it is doable, our daughter came home after withdrawing from school. She went out and got a job. She is actually very good at what she is doing and it has helped her confidence (depression had taken it from her). She also began counseling. It took three tried to find the right person. She has now enrolled in a close by college. She will live at home to get a good semester under her. Her first semester out of state was good and her second one is all W’s. She is not out of the woods, but we are going to do this growing up thing a little slower. She went off to school in the first place having had a traumatic experience the spring of her senior year of HS and she thought she was more ready to go off than she was. But it is not a life sentence to have trails off the path. You just have to keep going and get back on the path. That path can change too from what it started out as. Plan B is a good one and if that doesn’t work out, there is always plan C, D, E etc.
First, depression is a serious matter. It can and derail everything so your first task should be to address it directly. This may mean dropping out of school temporarily as your experience and grades will likely only continue to plummet if you keep trying to do the impossible. I stayed in school for as long as I could because my parents told me if I dropped out I would never go back. They were wrong. From age 22 to 30 I lived life. I worked hard and supported myself satisfactorily. At age 30 I went back to finish my undergraduate. By age 38 I finished post graduate studies and was teaching at the same school from which I dropped out. There is no prescribed timetable for success.
Thanks Thelma…Its kinda hard i wish my mom and dad saw this also in me but they just believe everything I say is bull shit. But at the moment my parents are near their own breaking point also. I also have two younger sisters who need to go to school so that also places a bit of strain on things financially. And about the Devil metaphore you have no idea lol heaven hasn’t really been on my side lately so anyway thanks for the advice. Its more the fact that because of my past failures my parents are afraid to let go. (at least that is what I think) Aside from online help I’ve been doing most of supply gathering for college by myself. The therapy i took ended recently because my mother disagreed with the advice the therapist gave me. In any case thanks for the advice.
When my daughter was in her second year of college it was fairly common for many of her classmates to experience a spiritual malaise which involved skipping classes, plummeting grades and a general sense of being in over one’s head, even following a successful freshman year. The phenomenon has a name: “Sophomore Slump” and there are many theories as to what causes it. Not everybody is affected by it equally but there are articles on it, people warn you about it, but it IS a thing and no one is ever really prepared. Having a possible pre-existing condition such as clinical depression on top of that just exacerbates everything. In my daughter’s class, not everyone managed to recover equally from Sophomore Slump. Some who were able to manage to stay afloat during sophomore year worked extra hard junior year to make up for the grades dip of the year before. Some classmates did withdraw because they were flunking out and subsequently transferred to local community colleges to try to pick up their GPAs and regroup psychologically. A few returned after a couple of semesters having picked up their grades, thus "proving themselves"enough to the college to justify their return. Some others who left decided to apply to and attend a different 4 year institution, and successfully graduated.
But like others here have said, if clinical depression is involved you can’t be talked out of it. You can’t “tough it out”. Clinical depression has a biological basis and it needs to get treated, like a broken arm. You really need to get evaluated, get treatment if you do have it, get stable, and then decide what the best path is for you to reach your goals. You may find you want to take time off from studies and work to clear your head. You may decide to take some courses at community college. You may consider transferring to another college. You may decide you have the intestinal fortitude to return for junior year if you feel up to it and can concentrate again. In any case the first thing you have to do is take care of yourself before you can take care of the rest.
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Please pay attention to Vot123’s last paragraph. It’s dead on.
If your mom pulled you from therapy, try elsewhere. You don’t have to depend on your parents, or their insurance, to get good help. The hardest part will be starting. I know – I’ve lived with clinical depression since college, and I’m the parent of a college student now.
Maybe try lightening the load if that makes any sense. If I was in your situation I would take my time when it came to school. No one says you need to finish in 4 years exactly. Also learn to stay motivated, I’ve know too many people who wish to be in college right now but can’t so you should enjoy it the best way you can by staying healthy and taking care of yourself.
I would recommend joining a club. I know you’re obviously sensitive with time and being stressed out but having something “non school related” could probably give you something to look forward to or give you a break every once in a while.
Thanks +Dizzlebrain for the advice this quarter is my junior year I can only hope things work out I’ll take your advice towards the club idea.
And thanks everyone that replied to this post. I was running out of ideas.
HUGE THANK YOU! 
:3
Lots of good advice above! To which I will add, not all therapy is equal. Different therapies work better for different patients. If you spent a year with one therapist and it wasn’t working for you, maybe try another who has a different approach. Your college should have mental health services on campus that can give you free or deeply discounted support, so take full advantage of that if Mom refuses to pay for a new therapist.
Also, I really endorse the suggestion to get physical exercise (even if it’s just walking) and join a club. For me, some of the biggest progress against my own depression has come from simple regular exercise and regular human contact. Movement and hugs - it’s surprisingly good medicine for being so simple! Also, I highly recommend meditation of some sort. Meditation has really taught me to notice my depressive feelings without being overwhelmed by them.
Hang in there! You are aware of your depression, and that in itself is very meaningful progress. Far too many college students suffer in silence without even realizing what is going on, or that there is help available to them.