<p>I'm assuming my son can skip classes on that Wednesday to get an early flight home? Do many, or at least some, kids do that? Reality is setting in on what it means to go so far away to school. Thanksgiving is a big family get-together for us, so I know that he will always want to come home despite the inconvenience (or at least I hope he will!)</p>
<p>You’ll have to decide what’s right for your family. We decided the break was too short for S to travel to VT. It takes 2 flights and the chances of weather delay/cancellations that time of year are fairly high. Three times we have encountered such heavy fog in IA that planes couldn’t take off or land. Since we have relatives in the midwest, we have travelled to IA, picked up S and driven to WI for the weekend. The first year, fog in Cedar Rapids forced us to rent a car in Chicago, drive to Cedar Rapids to pick up the car we had rented there and deal with checked luggage that didn’t arrive until we were already in WI. The second year, we flew into Chicago and drove from there. As I recall, the weather was pretty bad. The third year, S was studying abroad. Senior year, I’m betting he will want to hang out on campus with friends.</p>
<p>I could be wrong, but I doubt that profs think it’s ok to skip a day of classes. I’d be interested to hear what other parents or students have to say about this. I know what you mean about reality setting in. The first year is the hardest.</p>
<p>Another thing to consider: the Wednesday before Thanksgiving is likely to be a huge travel day and airports are likely to be jam-packed with passengers. I know I sound like a Debbie Downer, but T’giving weekend has got to be one of the worst times to travel. The risk of a kid being stranded alone in an airport for the weekend is a real one.</p>
<p>SDonnCC-I’m sure you want the whole family together at all the holidays but embrace that your son’s life is his own, allow him to make his decisions.
He may prefer to stay at school-consider that finals and end of semester papers/projects are only a few weeks after Thanksgiving.
If your son stays at school, a feast is always planned for those students who remain on campus.
Or he may be invited to go home and celebrate with a friend who lives near by.
Don’t pressure him to come home unless he can, and he won’t know his schedule until he begins classes and the professors each have their own policy about that special Wednesday.
Don’t buy the plane tix yet.
He’ll be home soon enough for the Christmas break.</p>
<p>I understand SDONCC’s dilemma. Last week we had this discussion with our son. We usually go all out on Thanksgiving as well, but not this year. As I have learned, getting to San Diego from Grinnell involves pretty much a full day of air travel, so our son is opting to have Thanksgiving in Grinnell (I hope they’ll have tofurkey for him).</p>
<p>In the past we had the same dilemma with our oldest son who also went away to college. After getting home that first year, he decided it wasn’t worth all the trouble, and stayed on campus in subsequent years.</p>
<p>So this year - with one son in Oregon and one in Iowa - we have decided to do something completely different. Instead of entertaining, we are going away for Thanksgiving. For once we won’t be cooking and cleaning for two days! Maybe that will become our new Thanksgiving tradition.</p>
<p>Worthyscribe-Thanks for the testimonial!
Parents don’t realize how much stress they put on their kids about Thanksgiving.</p>
<p>for freshman year, I am sure he’ll want to come home. We have a large extended family gathering; it’s not a matter of just missing dinner with his family and siblings. Recognizing how busy travel is during this weekend, I would want him to get out on the early morning flight which is the only nonstop out of Des Moines for us. </p>
<p>While I appreciate everyone’s perspective on whether or not he should travel, the reality is that he will be coming home this year, and perhaps every year, thereafter, and we are trying to figure out the logistics.</p>
<p>I just don’t get why colleges have classes on that Wednesday. It seems to me that for a school like Grinnell which is so big on diversity that if it really does want to attract a wider range of students, they should have policies that recognize that it takes some doing to get in and out of Des Moines if you are not from the midwest.</p>
<p>This whole thing has nothing to do with his decisions, or letting him loose, but it is simply a recognition of the fact that my son is very close to his cousins, aunts and uncles, grandparents, etc. and loves family and holiday traditions. So, maybe he’ll decide that it is all too hectic and stay at Grinnell, or maybe he’ll just have to defy his professors and come home, or maybe he’ll end up transferring if it really was a mistake to go to Iowa for school!</p>
<p>His cousins have always come in from their midwestern colleges for Thanksgiving.</p>
<p>We are from California too and have already decided that either we are going to Iowa for Thanksgiving or our S will be spending Thanksgiving with friends that he makes. It’s very common for a lot of the students at Grinnell to not go home for Thanksgiving. Many I have been told invite the students that can’t go home to their homes or they get together and do their own Thanksgiving. This is common in many schools. They have such a long break at the holidays and time off in October. Try to keep in perspective that this is only for four years. Before you know it they will be back to your table at Thanksgiving. </p>
<p>Worthyscribe, we are considering the same thing and may actually take our Thanksgiving to Iowa. Heck, we might spend it in a restaurant, but it will be an
adventure and we might actually really enjoy it. I always say, “Life is a journey”. </p>
<p>SDonCC, you must do what you think is best. Good luck with your situation.</p>
<p>This is my very first post. My daughter is an incoming Freahman at Grinnell. I can tell you that we will be one of those families who invites students to our home (in Iowa) for the Thanksgiving break. My duaghter and I have already talked about this and it will be fun for us to spend some time getting to know some of her new friends.</p>
<p>Well, OP, if it’s a nonstop flight that’s a whole lot better than our situation with a connection. Your family will figure out what’s best for you. But you started your first post, “I’m assuming my son can skip classes that Wednesday…” and yes, he can; no one can stop him, but I doubt it would be appreciated and I doubt it’s standard procedure. But who knows? It may not be a problem at all. Best wishes!</p>
<p>Wow, jdash–welcome! And how sweet of you to have students over for the break. You will be sent a link to the Grinnell parents’ listserve, another great way to share info and feel connected.</p>
<p>jdash-folks like you saved my daughter at Thanksgiving. She came home her first year but felt too much of the break was tied up in air travel and elected not to come home for Thanksgiving this past year. One of her friends took 8 kids home for Thanksgiving dinner. She loved it!</p>
<p>First year, son felt he could not make the seven hour drive home for Thanksgiving, even though it is a big deal in our family as well. Second year, he brought a carload of friends home. But they waited until everybody was done with all their Wednesday classes before hitting the road. </p>
<p>I agree with the OP in wishing the break was longer, but I also agree with Bethievt that one can’t assume that it is ok to skip class on Wednesday. </p>
<p>We too have considered heading to Iowa this fall if son feels he can’t make it home for Thanksgiving. But if you have ever traveled on Thanksgiving, you know that the restaurant options can be slim to none. And it’s not like you can get a Thanksgiving dinner for takeout, like you can in some metro areas.</p>
<p>D’s Mom, we were considering the Thanksgiving in Grinnell route as well, but for this year we are going to go to Carmel. Nepenthe Restaurant calls!</p>
<p>Thanks Jdash and Dairy State k8 for hosting those not from the Mid West. I am willing to bet in coming years we are going to be putting up lots of students from Grinnell over winter break (San Diego is a great respite from the cold).</p>
<p>Weighing in not as a Grinnell alum (I am) but as a parent. D is a first-year in college in Boston and we traditionally spend T’giving with my in-laws in Chicago. Her school had classes on the Wednesday before and she didn’t want to miss them, so she flew late in the day and I held my breath that the weather and the travel gods would smile on her, which they did. If you check the Parent Cafe on the that day, you will see lots of similar anxiety - I even had a CC family in Boston ready to take her in if she got stranded :)</p>
<p>It felt really important to me (but maybe not so much to her) to have her with us on T’giving, but in hindsight, it was extremely stressful and a long way for her to travel for just a couple of days. I expect she’ll stay in Boston next year.</p>
<p>D is also an incoming freshman, and we also wondered about this. We always drive to the beach from our home for several days, but realized that would be impossible to do on top of flying D in. Instead, we are going to do “Thanksgiving” during the October break. It is longer, no one else is traveling, and it will be far less stressful. I never went home for T-day in
college, and survived nicely.</p>
<p>It’s such a terrible time to travel, and so few days. My daughter came home the first year; went to a friend in Iowa (and had a great time) the second.</p>
<p>right now, my son says he wants to come home for Thanksgiving, but I have made it clear that he can change his mind, but I would be surprised if he didn’t come home at least this first year. Look, if he feels like he’d prefer to stay on campus I guess that would be a good sign that he is comfortable. It would be easier if our family could do what so many of you are doing and make your Thanksgiving more portable, but we have relatives who fly and drive in from other parts of the country. It is like a reunion. </p>
<p>Ironically, I already told my daughter who is going to school closer to home that she can feel free to bring friends home at Thanksgiving if she wants to!</p>
<p>Just wanted to add another first year to the list of those staying in Grinnell for Thanksgiving. We live two flights away and find it just too expensive to travel during Thanksgiving, particularly when compared with flying home for the fall break when we can use frequent flyer miles.</p>
<p>Just my two cents: If you have a direct flight, it’s doable. If you’re making a connection, it’s probably not worth the stress and uncertainty.</p>