Friends at Pitt

<p>This may seem like a weird question, but how long does it normally take to find a group of friends or at least start talking to people? Today was my first day at Pitt and I'm not even going to lie, I was miserable. I came here all by myself from far away, so that sucked enough, but what really sucked is that NO ONE talked to me and vice versa. I tried to start a conversation, but everyone was either with their friends or family and I didn't want to bother them. I went to my room at about 7pm and bawled my eyes out and have been here ever since because it was so bad. I've never been good at making friends, so can you tell me how long it usually takes to get a group going or whatnot? I just feel like an outcast and don't even know what to do. Any advice would be helpful. Thanks.</p>

<p>I know that when I first went to boarding school it took awhile to find a group of friends. Joining clubs, attending dorm events, going to intrammurals, etc. all will help. Are they not having some type of huge Welcome Week or Orientation to keep you guys busy? Most colleges do that to facilitate the transition, get students to mingle and to keep students’ minds off of missing home. Heck, boarding school even kept us SWAMPED the first week with activities.</p>

<p>Is Pitt doing orientation? Are RAs around to talk to or seek help from?</p>

<p>I met someone who said she wanted to leave Pitt the first semester because she would talk to her friends from home at their state flagship and they were having a blast. In the end, she ended up happy at Pitt…but said it did take awhile to find her niche.</p>

<p>Give it time, as there are probably plenty of others who are feeling like you. But it is really disappinting if the RAs and orientation people are not reaching out to you. Hopefully they will reach out soon!</p>

<p>Are you in a dorm? I’m surprised there aren’t some floor activities. Do you have a roommate? I remember back in the day just sitting in your room with the door open would encourage people to float in and out or at least say hi when they walked by. I guess I don’t get why you’re so on your own this early on?</p>

<p>Agreed with everyone else. You moved in pretty early, most freshman are moving in today and tomorrow and might be with their parents for these two days. Orientation activities SHOULD start today since it’s the first official day of freshman on campus.</p>

<p>Leave your door open, hopefully as people move into your floor today/tomorrow they will stop by. Have you met your RA? They will be a big help in getting your oriented and showing you around, especially if you are from far away. They are here to help make you comfortable, so if you are miserable go talk to him/her!!</p>

<p>Also, the activities fair will be this Sunday up at the Pete (the big atheltics complex at the top of the hill) from 12-5. Go wander around and sign up for literally ANY club that looks interesting. Go attend the first meetings (they should bribe you with free food!) and I promise lots of other people will be there.</p>

<p>In your class, talk to your classmates if you get a chance. Especially before/after the class (before may be a bit easier). It can be generic stuff like “Do you know anything about the professor?” “I have a feeling I will hate 9am Lab” etc.</p>

<p>I know the feeling of being all alone. I was one of two people from my school to go to Pitt and I was not close to the other girl, plus she lived in a different dorm. I had only ever been to Pittsburgh once before move-in! However, if you just start talking to people as they pop-in and as you go to all the orientation activities I think you will be fine! The first day is always rough- I was super nervous about getting dinner by myself the first night. But hang in there, it will get a lot easier as the week goes on.</p>

<p>If you want someone to talk to or hangout with- shoot me a PM, I can at least show you around and grab a bite to eat or coffee for a bit if you’re lonely :)</p>

<p>So simplychelsea we are all wondering (and hoping) that today went better. Please let us know how you are doing.</p>

<p>OMG I’m at Pitt right now too and I feel the same way :(</p>

<p>I can’t wait until classes start, because right now I feel the same way.</p>

<p>Why don’t you all meet up. Guaranteed to have someone to talk to. And for ComicStix and ImDown- let me know how you’re feeling in a day or two once orientation gets into swing. The offer for coffee or a meal stands for all of you guys (we can even do a big group meeting if you want).</p>

<p>This thread is kind of disheartening. Just talked to a friend that started at a different large state Univ. in another state. The University has kept them constantly busy with dorm and hall activities, big brother/big sister things, brother/sister hall things and a multitude of other things. She is having a blast and their Welcome Week is one full week. She can be shy, so was really glad that all the activities, groups, icebreakers, etc. were planned for them. She said tomorrow they meet with their advisors and have small advising groups run by TAs that are taking them out. They also are having activities specifically for International Students, OOS students, etc.
What is it at Pitt? Do they not do those things? And I continue to ask…Where are the RAs? Are they aware that some students are not meeting up with people yet?</p>

<p>I am sure it will work out for you all, but I think you should let someone know that (IF this is the case) the orientation has not been inclusive, welcoming and helpful for some.
HSG</p>

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<p>From what I remember of my year, this is very similar. You basically have a ton of orientation activities throughout the day (some mandatory, others not) that you can attend with your floor/dorm. Things like casino night, movie showings, trips to Target to get supplies, a Luau on the Union, etc. One of the nights they do a “midnight tour” of Pitt where you wander around and find where all of your classrooms are at midnight using a flashlight. I know my dorm also had activities like midnight capture-the-flag, trips to get Rita’s and eat on the Cathedral Lawn, pick-up sports games, etc.</p>

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<p>They should be there. And if they are doing their job correctly, should be encouraging things like “open door policy”. They should also be hosting events DAILY for kids to go to and meet up with (easy things like grabbing coffee or ice cream, going to see a movie at the park, walking around campus, etc.). </p>

<p>Part of the experience though is being proactive. My first night on campus I wandered around my dorm and saw a bunch of kids playing cards. I asked if I could join and then we started playing when we realized we wanted to play with poker chips, which I had. So I ended up running to my room, grabbing them, and playing Texas Hold 'Em with a bunch of kids I didn’t know until like midnight. </p>

<p>Don’t be shy about going into someone’s room and just knocking and saying hello. Chances are many people in your dorm/on your floor are new to the area and would love to have someone to talk to, do something with, hang out, or wander around.</p>

<p>I’m going to agree with Awesome - go knock on a door. Son became fast friends with “floor mates” last year and many of them are all together again this year. Find your RA and tell him/her that you are feeling alone. Your RA should be able to help that is his/her job. The RA’s usually organize “floor” activities - son’s were mandatory last year. Hang in there.</p>

<p>I’m perplexed by the sentiments of three freshman on this thread. My freshman D moved in on the 20th, and has had time to catch her breath. The orientation activities keep her very busy. When my older D was a freshman three years ago, she had the same crazy schedule.</p>

<p>Are all of you living on campus? Something doesn’t seem right.</p>

<p>I found a friend on like Wednesday so I don’t feel as lonely now haha I just had to give it time</p>

<p>Comic…glad things are getting better. Yep, takes time.
Also, do join in on stuff. You will be amazed at how many others, I bet, are at things in hopes of meeting new people!
HSG</p>