No. I think you would see it in Texas, and probably top private day schools everywhere. Anyplace in the US with fairly high population density.
We are in the Midwest, Chicago suburbs.
But I do think that it’s not as high-stress in the surrounding states.
@intparent, she wants to stay in the Midwest. At one time, she talked of going east or west coast, but I think she wants to be within a day’s drive from home. In the end she made a point to look no further than 8 hours drive from home.
So my D’s major of choice only requires College Algebra, but the CG says to be competitive for admission she will need at least AP Calc AB. D wants to take a double block of AP Calc AB/BC just in case.
@BeeDAre , your D sounds like mind.
Mind accepts the stress, tears and lack of sleep because she wants to make the most of the opportunity she has. I think she enjoys the feeling she gets when she meets a challenge, like an endorphin release a runner gets. She has also become much more confident and independent, maybe it her way trying to become her own person.
@tiger1307 We are at a West Coast school with a moderate amount of stress, but there are certainly high schools in California, largely in the Silicon Valley and Pasadena areas, that have high amounts of stress and the types of workloads described here.
I think people at our school think the stress level is high, and it is compared to when the parents were kids. It is not as extreme as at some other schools, however.
I would say that the top private school thing is less of an influence in California than in the Northeast. There are a couple of top private schools that I can think of, but most of the top schools with the high stress levels in California are large public high schools. Some are magnets and some just draw from a highly-educated local population.
My friends in CA whose kids want to go to a UC had a lot of stress as well. The NYC, Boston, Philadelphia, DC suburbs may have a higher concentration of the higher stress areas than the mid-West however.
We are in California We just havent seen the type of stress that people are describing Maybe there is some of it in Silicon Valley. I dont know. The Ivies are not a big focus here. There are also not many private high schools and the private schools that exist are usually religious based
I live in the Southeast, and we don’t experience the level of stress prevalent on CC here. DS is highly ranked , with very good GPA and ECs, although he is not driven to attend a highly ranked college or one of the Ivies. He takes a rigorous course load (currently 5 APs) to challenge himself.
7am until 10 pm was normal for my D. in HS, sometime with no stop at home, depending on the day’s schedule. I do not think that she had 3 hrs / homework on the weekdays, she simply did not have time for that. !0pm was her bedtime. She was a happy kid with tons of interests, lots and lots of friends also with various interests and different personalities. She attended private HS that happened to be #2 in our state (we did not know that fact when she started there) and it was a perfect place for her. I do not think that missed lots of parties, dances and proms - 4 proms, one every year. The balanced life is a key along with planning of every week. If they cannot handle a HS load, how they are going to handle the college load and at the much higher level of academics. Forget AP and things like that, the intro college classes will be harder than that!
Have the guts to follow your own path.
Some kids are self-motivated and will sign up for loads of APs, ECs, Sports simply because they love it. They feel no stress from it because they are not competing with anyone. This carries on in Life. I know many people managing careers at the highest levels along with serving their communities, pursing the dreams of a life-long athlete and life-long learner.
If your child is one of those then don’t worry. If they aren’t then let them find their own appropriate level and don’t worry about that either.
We are only competing with our own potentials and best selves.
Our D, like others, is extremely busy. 5 APs and she dances in her dance school’s company. She has either lessons, rehearsals or both every afternoon/evening except for Thursday and the occasional Friday (that includes Saturday). One of the things I was really happy she did (and so is she now) is to fill in her final period with a study hall rather than another class. She had enough credits to do so and the most selective school she is applying to is our in state flagship. It’s first thing in the morning so she can finish any undone homework or studying before class. She usually gets home each evening by 7-9:30 so this allows her to get to bed by 10:30-11:30 each night. Her big challenge will be in December when the company performs the Nutcracker. She has 4 parts so she’s always rehearsing something. Finals will be the week after the performance and the week prior to finals will be fill with rehearsals.
Call me a fuddy duddy, but when do these kids have time to collect their thoughts, reflect on what they are learning beyond test prep and paper completion, or just let their thoughts wander for a while? Maybe the runners do… but I can’t see how such an energizer bunny existence produces deep thinkers.
Some of the East Coast prep schools with which I’m familiar have jettisoned AP’s for just this reason. To loosely quote one Headmaster (who I’m sure said it better), “Why would we want our students doing the same experiments being done by students across the country and trying to arrive at one right answer? We want our students to design their own experiments and reflect on them. We want our students to digress, to explore, to think deeply.”
To be fair @Sue22, as a recent graduate of one of those schools, just because the school does not offer AP’s does not mean the workload and/or the stress is less. True, they don’t teach to the test and in so doing allow the students to think more creatively. However, many of the 11th and 12th grade offerings, while not carrying an AP designation, are as challenging, if not more so, than an AP class.
@skieurope,
True. One of the schools that doesn’t offer AP’s is Winsor, a Boston day school that sends approximately 35% of the graduating class to the Ivies, Stanford or MIT. It’s a pressure cooker.
Some schools that have dropped AP’s have done so because they feel their own offerings are more rigorous than courses with the AP designation. Some kids take these non-AP courses but then take the AP anyway and score 4’s and 5’s.
@skieurope - I agree with you that the workload is still high - and often the stress - at top boarding schools. However, I see a lot less of the busy work described in some of these posts. I also like how the schools carve out parts of the day where everyone does sports and can also dabble in arts and EC activities. And sit down at meals with their friends and community members. So, there can be stress and there definitely is a full day with academic rigor but more balance than I see in some of these posts. I also like that many of them not only forgo AP classes but also class rank and GPA calculations. It helps keep a lid on the feelings of competition and fosters cooperation. Sleep, however, is often still in short supply.
Tiger: Isn’t there a lot of competition for UCs? Seem to read about that here on CC and to see it with my mostly Bay Area friends and family. Those kids seem to work as hard as kids around here, do sports and other ECs. I am talking more normal, hard working stress, not 18 hours per day 7 days a week.
The first high school I went to didn’t offer AP classes. The highest math was pre calc, but if a student finished that and still wanted more, there was a university just down the street (yes, you could walk) and it was better then “just like college” because it was actual college. Even today I think this high school offers only 6 or 7 AP classes because, well, that university is still just down the street. It’s one of the biggest high schools in the state.
Intparent,
"Maybe the runners do… " - and the swimmers have plenty of time not only be engaged in social activities with their teammates, but plan, dream, write their new English paper and resolve that Physics problem in their head while swimming with their head down in a water. It is very quiet there. Multitasking is not a big stress at all if person is used to it. It actually helps. Just like minors at college may help with unrelated majors providing the break from the same focus. It actually has a name, it is called synergy.
In regard to some kind of “deep thinkers”, what is it? Is an engineer a deep thinker? Is lawyer a deep thinker? Is home builder a deep thinker? I cannot pinpoint this idea at all. Some jobs require logic, others more into creativity and the most require certain degree of both. Kids who involve themselves in many unrelated activities are not only making themselves happy and satisfied with their every day life, they also stimulate very different parts of their brains, they meet very different type of people and become accepting and interesting individuals. I do not know how exactly it works, but D. was claiming while at college that her Music Minor was helping her in her physics classes as she found herself to see the problems from the different prospective than others, she felt that she was more creative. I am not an expert in all of this.
I agree, if one cannot handle the load, then unload. But many will not be happy with their lives being hermits in their rooms doing homework day in and day out. And it is certainly not the way to raise a social and accepting individual. Kids have to have a chance to connect with different people at very different levels and grow as a person. This side of growth and development is overlooked by many although it is very important part of preparing yourself to be an independent adult.
Last week and this week, three of D’s teachers postponed due dates for some major assignments. I thought it was odd, so I asked her what was going on. D said she heard the district is getting complaints about the amount of homework because there have been uprisings in neighboring districts. Some have taken small steps to limit homework, though I don’t think an occasional homework-free night is going to solve the problem when kids are up until 2 AM all the other nights.
Her social studies class had a discussion about homework levels and watched this video about a NJ town. The teacher said the featured parents are middle school parents!: http://www.njtvonline.org/news/video/study-says-excessive-homework-leads-to-stressed-and-tired-students/
All these towns are affluent suburban districts in NJ who seem to be admitting there’s a problem with homework, testing, and general high student stress.
http://www.nj.com/mercer/index.ssf/2015/10/high_levels_of_stress_in_students_lead_to_district.html
http://www.nj.com/mercer/index.ssf/2015/10/princeton_schools_announced_homework-free_weekends.html
http://www.nj.com/mercer/index.ssf/2013/06/hopewell_valley_school_board_limits_amount_of_homework_assigned_to_students.html