Fun at Boarding School

<p>Okay, this is something that I've wanted to ask for quite a while, but until now, I refrained because I thought it would be poorly received. I've decided to just ask it.</p>

<p>Is there actually any fun at boarding school? I would like to know specifically for Hotchkiss (going to revist day this week as a repeat junior), but I'm sure people would like to know for other schools as well. Please don't give me any, "We play cards in the cafeteria and sometimes chuckle when someone says something dumb" type responses. I know you are there to study, but it is possible to study and do legitimately fun stuff. I know there are dances, but how frequent are they and are do people actually dance or is it people standing around awkwardly while a dj plays music? Are there parties? If so, what are they like? Again, please don't give me a response an admissions director would give.</p>

<p>I'm just curious and it seems like something people avoid talking about on here.</p>

<p>If this upsets you, I apologize.</p>

<p>prep: I’m cracking up over your “sometimes chuckle” comment. I’ve got to find out if chuckling is allowed at Choate. ;)</p>

<p>This really is not a thread for parents to comment on. What do we know about fun? I’m going to sit back and wait for current students to post. I want to see just what constitutes fun these days. Interesting topic.</p>

<p>I agree, great topic Prepdreams. I think this topic is one of the primary reasons my son is a little reluctant to leave home for BS. I am with Choatiemom; can’t wait for responses.</p>

<p>I don’t go to Hotchkiss but I do go to a different NE prep school and I’ll just tell you, it’s not very fun. There is shockingly little to do on campus, and by now I’ve already done it all. The events the school hosts during the weekend are usually pretty laughable. Dances, save for the few “big dances” of the year, tend to be extremely lame. Typical weekend activities involve hanging out with friends watching tv/movies/etc. Sometimes, when you’re in the mood to do something actually fun, you just end up wandering around campus for a while, and then going back at sign in disappointed. The hook up culture is also really intense bc of the lack of activites.
Kids go into Boston sometimes and can have a lot of fun there. A lot of international students seem to do this - they go to Boston or New York and party on the weekends. Parties are basically nonexistent, any “party” type thing is either off-campus or very (very) small and in dorm rooms/outside.
That said, there is somewhat prevalent drug/alcohol use, at least more than you would expect I guess. Nothing compared to local public high school, but there are a lot of insane personalities at boarding school (when you put a lot of highly intelligent, rich, and overworked teenagers together, that’s what happens). Crazy things happen. Some students do abuse drugs regularly, there are campus drug dealers, people sneak out of dorms, get sent to rehab, etc.
HOWEVER, at boarding school you will make some of the best friendships you could ever make. You will also grow a lot as a person and will be way more mature than anyone who went to normal high school. That’s basically the only good things, in my opinion. Definitely don’t go to boarding school if you want to have a really fun time, or if you want to improve your chances of college admissions. You will be disappointed in both. </p>

<p>@boredrightnow WHOA. What school do you attend? :O</p>

<p>I find it odd that @boredrightnow created an account just to answer this question. It’s possible, and I’m not even sure of the definition of “■■■■■,” but that word is on my mind right now.</p>

<p>@stargirl3 yeah i noticed that too :-? interesting. veeery interesting.</p>

<p>It’s also possible that Boredrightnow is a regular poster who created this account to not reveal his/her identity, especially with 2 parents upthread waiting to see the responses. So I’m not convinced that s/he is a ■■■■■, because while extreme, there is a kernel of truth in what was written. The last paragraph is accurate if you take out the part that that is the only good thing about life at BS; that may one of the best things, but there are many other good things.</p>

<p>.</p>

<p>@skieurope True, very true. </p>

<p>As a parent, I’ve also wondered about the incidences of alcohol/drug use. I am not naive to think it doesn’t happen at BS but I often wonder if it’s better/worse than at local PS.</p>

<p>I don’t think it will be worse than the local public school, considering you will have teachers living with you, but you can’t be sure…</p>

<p>@Newbie3kids This was asked on another thread recently, and this was my response which also may assist the OP:</p>

<p>Some high school students drink. Some do drugs. Some have sex. This is true if the student is in public school or private school. I personally have seen little drug/alcohol use occur on-campus. Usually it happens at a party at a day student’s house/other off-campus venue, or while away on break, and certainly more often in the later years. There are certainly no keg parties in the dorms. Yes, it is a violation of the code of conduct, and yes, it is enforced. However, I know of no HS in the country that does not have a drug and alcohol policy.</p>

<p>The schools are acting in loco parentis and they take it seriously. All boarding schools have weekend activities as described above to keep the kids occupied. Teenagers, however, are resourceful. I don’t know about other schools, but mine extends the prohibited items list to visitors to the school. So parents can’t smoke or drink on the property, and the school sends out an email to the parents prior to graduation to not bring champagne.</p>

<p>Some statistics from a comparable school:</p>

<p><a href=“http://www.phillipian.net/sota13/sections/drugs.html”>http://www.phillipian.net/sota13/sections/drugs.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>@prepdreams I can offer no viewpoint on Hotchkiss, I will give you my general view from experience. What constitutes “fun” is different to a 14 yo freshman and a 19 yo PG. I’ll give you my perspective as a junior guy. At my school, academics and EC’s keep you pretty busy. I am by no means an academic grind, but I do put in the time and I do well. I also take advantage of outside activities on the weekends for fun.</p>

<p>Yes, we have dances every few weeks. Are they better than any other HS dance? No. It is what you make of it. I generally go with a group of friends, rather than a date, and that is pretty typical here. The dances are as lame or exciting as you want them to be. Also, depending on how wide/narrow the BS/townie divide is, there are also dances at the local public and parochial school.</p>

<p>Most schools offer weekend activities. Depending on the school, they can become monotonous. The dorm head or prefect will often supplement these activities.</p>

<p>I don’t go to a school with Saturday classes, so Saturday mornings are all about sleeping in. As I’m a 3 sport varsity athlete, my Saturday afternoons are games and/or travel. Different schools have different school spirit, so the stronger spirit schools have a lot of students in the stands.</p>

<p>Sundays, my friends and I make our own fun. Generally we go into Boston or Cambridge for movies/shopping/hanging out. That’s not an option for schools in the boondocks, so some of the ways they pass time are mentioned in my earlier entry, if the school has not done an adequate job of keeping the kids engaged.</p>

<p>Other times, we just do what other kids do in their free time. We play video games, watch TV, listen to music, and yes, play cards. It’s prep school after all.</p>

<p>@skierope Thank you for responding and the link to some statistics for one school</p>

<p>@boredrightnow
Whoa! What do you mean when you say that it doesn’t improve your college admissions? Are you saying that just going to a regular public high school is better for college??? NO WAY! What? You got me confused here… More than 20% of boarders in top schools go to Ivies… What are u talking about?</p>

<p>We just returned from revisit day. We spent time with a friend there whose daughter and now whose son attended. Both students loved being at BS and took advantage of so many great clubs and activities and opportunities for them there. Spoke with some of their student friends as well. Boredom is not an issue. There are parties (unauthorized of course). There is drinking and there are drugs (which is a good way to get expelled). If you need the latter pastimes, don’t bother to go to boarding school. If you can have fun with your friends doing things that are legal, don’t worry. There are more things to do than just play cards…</p>

<p>The first dance of the year is usually great, and the formals, and the Gold and Silver, and night games if they happen or bonfires or casino night or movie nights outside, but some school events aren’t going to be great for everyone. Sometimes there’s a juggler or a hypnotist or a magician or bingo. If your events aren’t what you want, try to join the committee and make them better. This year has been a long winter, people usually get sick of being stuck inside. Fall and spring are in my experience a lot more fun than winter.</p>

<p>@mathman1201 </p>

<p>Yup. It’s harder to stand out in a group of overacheivers. The kids who go to Ivies probably would’ve gotten into Ivies from home. </p>

<p>Thank you all for the help. To be honest, there is a pretty wide range of answers, but it still gives a good idea of what can be like. Thanks!</p>

<p>I am prepared to believe that the variety of “fun” experiences to be had at BS differs tremendously. That’s why you try to find out about the school and see what’s been done there. At my children’s school, there are traditional fun activities, from the once a year “Frosty Run” to Wendy’s all over the area to the indoor-soccer league, which lasts months. The dances are not all the same; the first one is always a square dance that is wild and wildly popular, and the most recent was a swing dance with live musicians. Students have made up their own pastimes, like a “Survivor” series, which was filmed, and a trick-shot frisbee club. It pays to ask about, or to look out for evidence of, these things at a target school. </p>