Funniest Lines on Report Cards in NY Schools

Pre-College Issues High School Life
1

<p>From a Web site, here are some "for real" written comments made by New York City public school teachers. These are too good not </p>

<p>to share, and for the record, all teachers responsible for these gems were reprimanded.
To wit:</p>

<p>Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.</p>

<p>I would not allow this student to breed.</p>

<p>Your child has delusions of adequacy.</p>

<p>Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.</p>

<p>Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.</p>

<p>The student has a "Full Six-Pack," but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.</p>

<p>The child has been working with glue too much.</p>

<p>When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.</p>

<p>The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.</p>

<p>If this student was any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.</p>

<p>It's impossible to believe that the sperm that created this child beat out 1 million others.</p>

<p>The wheel is turning, but the hamster is definitely dead.
Teacher</a> comments can sting - Berkshire Eagle Online</p>

<p>My favorites are, "Your child has delusions of adequacy", and "Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them."</p>

2

<p>AAaahahahaha brilliant.</p>

3

<p>LAUSD only lets teachers use a set list of comments. The best one I know of is "Too many non-dresses." The best one I've seen for myself is "Respects public and private property."</p>

4

<p>i wish teachers could make their own comments at our school, we just have generic ones. the best is if reg teachers use ones intended for gym classes like, comes dressed appropriately for class.</p>

<p>my personal favs of this list are your child has delusions of adequacy and when your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.</p>

5

<p>Too many non-dresses?</p>

6

<p>^ that one's for PE, though a regular teacher could use it too.</p>

7

<p>My teachers hardly even leave comments.</p>

8

<p>LOL at my last school they used generic ones but you got one from almost every teacher. One of my teachers constantly picked on a kid in my class and even though he taught World History he used one from P.E., it said "Child needs to shower more often" hahahahaha</p>

9

<p>^ Haha, that's funny.</p>

<p>We have generic ones, and one of my teacher gaved me something along the lines of "Participate in class discussion very often". I found it kind of funny because I rarely say anything in class...</p>

<p>And once in middle school, my English teacher used "Rarely turn in homework". And I had a 96. Whatever.</p>

10

<p>I wish my teachers left comments. This wasn't on a report card, but when I was a freshman, my English teacher called my mom at work:
Teacher: Camille?
Mom: Yes.
Teacher: This is regarding your daughter.
Mom: Ok.
Teacher: Well, sh-she's been making awful sounds, like an animal or demon.
Mom: Ok...should I be concerned?
Teacher: Well...wha...
Mom: Click.</p>

11

<p>We don't get comments :(</p>

12

<p>LOL oh my gosh those made me laugh out loud!!! ahahahahaha</p>

<p>as did journalismbuddha's story... loool</p>

13

<p>LOLLOLOLOLOL. I would love to have those teachers because they would be sooo entertaining during class.</p>

14

<p>LOL! I want a teacher like that!</p>

15

<p>I got "Demonstrates Creativity" in a math class once.</p>

16

<p>
[quote]
I wish my teachers left comments. This wasn't on a report card, but when I was a freshman, my English teacher called my mom at work:
Teacher: Camille?
Mom: Yes.
Teacher: This is regarding your daughter.
Mom: Ok.
Teacher: Well, sh-she's been making awful sounds, like an animal or demon.
Mom: Ok...should I be concerned?
Teacher: Well...wha...
Mom: Click.

[/quote]

LOL - after my petition to indirectly get my 7th grade teacher fired, the teacher called my house and told my mom about it, or something, and my mom told her that she loved the idea of a petition and thought it was quite necessary in this case. Anyway, the teacher decided to start in about how terrible it was and how I was "undermining her authority" and my mom hung up on her.. ahawlefkwa.</p>

17

<p>I had the same teacher as journalismbuddah. I was failing the class because I wasn't turning my work in.</p>

<p>"Uh, your daughter is failing my class because of lack of work turned in"
Mom: Uh ok
Teacher precedes with a thirty minute rant about how I need to do my work, does not ask my mom anything, or let my mother get a word in edge wise. Afterwards my mom turned to me, "Now I know why you hate her."</p>

18

<p>I always get the most generic comments. "Pleasure to have in class" and "Assume Responsibility" or something like that.... LAME.</p>

19

<p>My favorite is ... has a full six pack, but lacking the plastic thing to hold it all together. Plastic thing? </p>

<p>I think it could be interpreted as "needs organizational skills" but that's not nearly so descriptive. Or more literally: Could you please buy the kid a notebook and planner.</p>

20

<p>^ Oh, I was just thinking it came from a PE teacher.</p>