Hello to all !
I thought it would be useful to combine knowledge and resources for parents whose kids are taking a gap year.
I have a HS senior daughter that will be taking a gap year to study in Germany through CBYX. So many questions and little answers.
Please join me in the discussion.
Hi Kelowna. 
I can’t help you with your questions since our kids’ gap years will look totally different, but just wanted to join the conversation.
Not sure what my son’s will look like, but so far, it looks like it will include a lot of music making and opportunities, possible animation job, maybe a community college animation class, keeping fresh on math skills, and generally just getting more mature and independent in all of life, but most especially health issues.
Thanks @sbjdorlo for joining the discussion,
I think no matter what our circumstances are it would be helpful to have this thread
Gap year parent here. Our son’s was not a travel/adventure gap year, but rather a “get a job and gain some maturity and experience in the real world” gap year. Big success.
Could you share more, @profparent? Thanks.
My son is taking a year and a half gap. He has gone from being 100 pounds overweight and on meds for bipolar disorder to being in incredible shape and off all meds. He has done volunteer work in Jordan and Lebanon. He now knows that his passion is to help people in the Middle East. He wants to go to the American University in Beirut to study English and education. We could not be more proud of him. If he had gone straight into college after high school, he might not be alive today, no exaggeration!
Sure, @sbjdorlo. Our son asked to take a gap year after HS, and everyone agreed this was a good idea because he needed the time to mature and become better prepared for the responsibilities of going to college. So he lived at home, applied for jobs, got a great half-time job working at the local public library, did some volunteering at the local food bank, cooked the family dinner once a week and prepared his own dinner many nights, worked on his creative writing, and sent off his college applications. He ended up loving his job, gained a great deal of maturity and self-confidence, and now feels ready to go to college in the fall. It turned out to be a wonderful year for everyone in the family, with a nice break from the stress of high school.
Hi! My daughter is taking a gap this year beginning this fall, hopefully working as an au pair in Germany. I would love to hear about experiences from other parents who have gone through it, or are also experiencing it currently. I am excited for her, but also nervous!
My S is just finishing up his gap year. He was diagnosed with anxiety in the spring of his senior year, so doing counseling and getting well was a big part of his year, but not the only part. Like profparent’s kid, my S also needed to work on maturity and self confidence and he did this by working and taking care of all his appointments and paperwork (something I had always helped him with before). He’s a musician and future comp sci major (dual degree), so he spent the year gigging, auditioning for summer festivals and doing competitions, and taking a few comp sci and math courses at our local U as a non-degree student. He also snagged a comp sci internship this spring, which was incredibly lucky for him, as it will be difficult to shoehorn computer internships into the busy vacations of a music performance student. He has had a wonderful year, as have we, his parents. Like profparent, I found this year to be a wonderful chance to reconnect with him without all the high school stress.
What I want to impress on you is that, though I think S did very well at filling his time with worthwhile activities, many of them cropped up along the way–they weren’t planned out by us from the beginning. For instance, my civic orchestra found itself suddenly without a concertmaster, and S stepped in to do that for 3 months, culminating in a couple concerts where he got to play some juicy solos. I think if you let your daughter follow her interests, she will discover many worthwhile things to do. It seemed scary to me to contemplate my S being home for an entire year without a “program,” but a program soon suggested itself. Also if your daughter is interested in doing any academics, MOOC’s are a great way to keep the education going without spending money on tuition.
Also, if you are thinking travel and language learning, consider wwoofing for a low-cost options: http://www.wwoof.net/
If the student is holding a deferred admission to start college after the gap year, check with that college before enrolling in any college courses to ensure that doing so will not cause the deferred admission to be revoked.
If the student intends to apply as a frosh during the gap year to start college in the fall after the gap year, check with every possible college of interest on their rules for frosh versus transfer.
That last point of ucbalumnus’s is crucial for eligibility for merit aid as well. We didn’t have our son take any classes during his gap year for this very reason–it would have made him ineligible for some important scholarship funding sources at many colleges, including three at which he specifically intended to apply.
@dec51995, your son’s gap year sounds like what may happen with my son. At this moment, there are no set plans other than what’s already in place (the show this summer and apparent quartet gigs, with the possible animation job, and all of these came about in the past 1 1/2 weeks). None of these were planned at all, except for ds wanting to form a quartet…but this one was formed for him and he, invited to be a part of it; so he might end up asking the other members to continue rehearsing together.
Did your son take his gap year after applying to colleges?
I would like to see my son do things like cook, but he seems bent on not doing that in college. He is not a big eater, and food can be uninteresting to him.
He also will be processing this with his counselor.
@profparent, so your son took a gap year before applying to colleges. It sounds like that worked out really well!
@MaineLonghorn, congratulations to your son! Wow, you have so many reasons to be proud!
And yes, we’re trying to find out if a community college class would be allowed. I know MIT allows it, but we’re waiting to hear back from Penn. Also, that’s a good point about outside scholarships and how they view a community college class as a non-degree seeking student. I guess I need to call National Merit and Elks Foundation and ask them.
Thanks for the tip.
Yes, we explicitly told our DS that we didn’t want him to apply to colleges until he felt ready to commit himself to the work involved once he got there. So it wasn’t clear at the beginning of the gap year whether he would apply to colleges that year or not, though we thought he might. We felt it was important for him to take ownership of the process, rather than feeling pressured by us or by a sense of inevitability. But it was also the case that one of the large scholarships he was potentially eligible for could not be deferred, so it seemed like waiting to apply was the sensible plan financially as well.
I’ll join in as well. S1 is 21, applied to college at the usual time and then deferred admission for a year which was spent at the Dynamy Internship Year program. Was a valuable year, not perfect but he grew a lot. However, he did not do anxiety-specific therapy or work that year, which in retrospect was a problem. Did one year of college and then went on leave due to anxiety beginning of sophomore year. Not yet ready to apply to transfer to another school, did 4 1/2 months intensive therapy and is SLOOOOWLY getting his act together–real slow… Not clear where he’ll be in the fall, but it’ll be the 2nd year off from school. I’ve told him either he finds half time work/volunteer/etc or we’ll be looking into some sort of away program.
D2 is on medical leave at the end of senior yr at a boarding school getting intensive treatment for anxiety and if all goes well will catch up enough to return for senior week and graduate Memorial Day weekend. She is accepted to college but it’s clear she needs to defer a year and sort herself out as well. I pretty much know her plans for the summer (intensive therapy, hopefully learn how to drive, work at her summer camp in August). No idea whatsoever what she’ll do in the fall…one day at a time at this point.
Darn. I was hoping that this was a thread about parents taking a Gap Year!
We are 85% sure D is going to take a Gap Year. It has always been on her radar but recently she is excited about the idea of going to college. Ultimately though, I think she will defer and take the Gap Year. I think she will love a year off from academics and having an adventure and I think she can use another year of growth and maturity.
She is applying for Americorps and other service projects through Student Conservation Association. WWOOFing is also a possibility. She needs to formally request the deferral from her college but they have already indicated she can keep her merit aid if she defers.
Just a tidbit of info, if anyone is in our shoes…
D called NMF to find out what she has to do in order to defer her scholarship by a year (she received corporate one). Was told to fax them a letter along with the gap year approval letter from college and that after that it is a non issue - they will approve it as long as college has approved it. Yay!
Kelowna, my son was given an email address from National Merit, and he forwarded all the emails from Penn regarding the gap year. NM seems easy to work with.
Also, I did call Penn and ask about community college classes for enrichment. Not only did they say it was fine, but they also said they have wiggle room for transfer credit for community college classes. That would be so awesome if my son could get any credit for his 39.5 units of college. It’s possible he might even get credit for the animation classes. We shall see.
Be aware that policies on community college credits during a gap year vary. S1 was told he could not take anything for credit. Always check with the college first!