Gatech supp essay. I need help ASAP!!!

<p>Hello everyone, I am appying to Gatech. I've written my essay. Could you guys read through and evaluate it for me please? Thank you so much! I do need help!</p>

<p>Prompt: Why are you interested in attending Georgia Tech and what do you hope to contribute to our community? (150 word limit)</p>

<p>I was not born on top but born to conquer it. Nothing satisfies my thirst more than the rewards hidden behind every challenge. Well-known for its difficult programs and heavy workload, Gatech attracted me. At this prestigious institute, I will receive the strongest academics, learn from the best professors, who sometimes prefer doing their research to teaching, and be in the same class with ingenious youths from around the world. Once I attend Gatech, I will put my endurance to the edge of being broken. Tough, I know. Difficulties, however, will sharpen my knowledge, urge me beyond my supposed boundary/ possibility/ ability to grow onto a higher standard. I will meet the ebullient bee community at Gatech and hopefully see myself turning into a daunting bee. I am now more than eager to wear white and yellow.</p>

<p>Replace Gatech with Caltech, MIT, Stanford, Duke, whatever. Any difference? Well, none really except the white-yellow part, which proves this essay can’t help you much.</p>

<p>Also “sometimes prefer doing their research to teaching” doesn’t sound like a compliment one would make to college professors, for obvious reasons.</p>

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<p>Cliched, boring.</p>

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<p>…same opinion as that of the poster above.</p>

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<p>Cliched, boring.</p>

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Just use one word.</p>

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<ol>
<li>Try not to use the same word twice in a sentence (eg: bee).</li>
<li>Stop using big words in place of simpler ones if they don’t enhance the meaning of the sentence. It doesn’t impress readers.</li>
<li>This sentence doesn’t really contribute anything to your essay.</li>
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<p>Overall, the essay is VERY vague. I agree completely with disari; you can replace Tech with any of the other universities and nothing would really change. You have to make this essay relevant to Tech. Do some reasearch. Talk about clubs. Talk about certain classes that are particularly unique to Tech. So far this reads as a very boring essay, and no adcom would be impressed.</p>

<p>(I apologize if I’m being harsh; just trying to help)</p>

<p>Like other people said, find things unique to Georgia Tech that you are genuinely interested (for example, in my Georgia Tech supplement I mentioned my desire to join the Co-op program). </p>

<p>Writing is technically sound, but generic. I don’t see anything that answers the “what do you hope to contribute to our community” part of the question. Also, yellow jacket =/= bee.</p>

<p>Thank you so much for your ideas. I will rewrite my essay!
@Truust: I appreciate your harshness, that’s all I really need. Thanks so much!</p>