General Questions for Boarding School Veterans

Prep School Admissions
1

<p>O.K…So I’m definably applying to boarding school. Theres really no turning back now. I want to make sure that I have a firm understanding on what happens so I’m positive I’m not making a mistake :(</p>

<li><p>Socially, what is it like at the average boarding school? Is there excessive popularity? Exclusion? Haha, Mean Girls-ish?</p></li>
<li><p>Do people reinvent themselves at boarding school? Im thinking of using it as a way to start over. i.e. switching my hairstyle, using a new nickname, and becoming a relatively new person.</p></li>
<li><p>Will I lose my parents? This is my biggest concern. I really couldn’t stand to risk my relationship with them. I dont want to be closer to my teachers then my Mom and Dad. Does that happen? Will it be like leaving them forever?</p></li>
<li><p>Do people date? I mean really date. Boyfriend and Girlfriend. Haha, this may seem immature, but do people kiss? I mean, I’m sure that schools don’t support kids making out everywhere! So where do it?</p></li>
</ol>

<p>I probably will add more, later. If you could just throughly answer these it would be fab :)</p>

2

<ol>
<li><p>There isn't really 'popular', but there are dominant groups on campus. It's not like middle school in that everyone wants to be 'popular', but there are the girls that hook up and wear the best clothes and come from the preppiest towns, etc. </p></li>
<li><p>I wouldn't suggest reinventing yourself. I really wouldn't. Everyone wants to do this - when they go to camp for the first time, when they go to high school, when they go to college, when they get their first job, etc. It's something about constantly perfecting yourself. I adopted a new nickname when I got here but now miss my old name. Please, please, please don't become a new person. There are people here who try to do that and it makes them unhappy. You can't force yourself to do that. </p></li>
<li><p>Before I left for boarding school, I was closer with many of my teachers than I am with Mom and Dad, but it's still that way for me (not teachers here - teachers at previous school). In a way, your relationship can strengthen, because you realize how much you love each other, etc. and can enjoy a long distance relationship without daily squabbles.
On the subject of leaving them forever --- when you go to boarding school, you do look around and realize that this is it from now on. From here out, it's college, then grad school or a job, etc. --- and you won't have that same long expanse of time at home with parents or friends that you did.</p></li>
<li><p>Date? Yes. But hooking up is more common. They hook up in the woods, by the tennis courts, in the chapel, at the soccer fields, etc. When people date, they date for a while and then break up. But then there are the people who have steady boyfriends/girlfriends, etc. </p></li>
</ol>

<p>I go to Choate, by the way, so if you're applying or just want to know about boarding school life, ask away.</p>

3

<ol>
<li>Are there parties? At my public schools there is a house party every weekend. I'm positive thats not the case with boarding school but are there parties? Or dances? Anything relatively party related to do with boarding school friends?</li>
</ol>

4

<p>Well, there's a SAC dance every week, and main dances every once in a while - the 3/4 ball, the Holiday Ball, the Last Hurrah for seniors (kind of like prom), etc. </p>

<p>Then, not really parties, but gatherings - team dinners, mug nights, dorm and floor unofficial movie nights, etc.</p>

5

<ol>
<li>Socially, what is it like at the average boarding school? Is there excessive popularity? Exclusion? Haha, Mean Girls-ish?</li>
</ol>

<p>Like Olivia said, there isn't really a 'popular' group, but there are the dominant groups in the school.</p>

<ol>
<li>Do people reinvent themselves at boarding school? Im thinking of using it as a way to start over. i.e. switching my hairstyle, using a new nickname, and becoming a relatively new person.</li>
</ol>

<p>Some people do, some don't. I kind of reinvented myself, but in a good way. I didn't change who I was, but I did change the way I looked and dressed and I've matured and grown a lot in a way that affects how I act and the things I say and stuff. It's good, though. I'm a quiet shy person that's learning how to be loud. :)</p>

<ol>
<li>Will I lose my parents? This is my biggest concern. I really couldn't stand to risk my relationship with them. I dont want to be closer to my teachers then my Mom and Dad. Does that happen? Will it be like leaving them forever?</li>
</ol>

<p>No, you won't lose your parents, you won't lose the relationship you have with them. You get great relationships with your teachers and houseparents and that's nice, me and one of my houseparents always joke that she's basically my mom at school, but my parents are, well...my parents. It's not like leaving them forever. You can go home, you go home on vacations. Yes, you're leaving them, but that's going to happen to everyone, it just happens sooner for those of us at boarding school.</p>

<ol>
<li>Do people date? I mean really date. Boyfriend and Girlfriend. Haha, this may seem immature, but do people kiss? I mean, I'm sure that schools don't support kids making out everywhere! So where do it?</li>
</ol>

<p>Yes, people date. Yes, people make out. In private. I go to an all girls school, so the whole dating thing is a little different and you only see the boyfriend on weekends and such and it's hard - I couldn't do it, to be honest, but I don't think it was working out anyway. I have a friend that's made it work. She sees her boyfriend ever weekend. She has to work to do it, but she does it.</p>

<ol>
<li>Are there parties? At my public schools there is a house party every weekend. I'm positive thats not the case with boarding school but are there parties? Or dances? Anything relatively party related to do with boarding school friends?</li>
</ol>

<p>There are dances with other schools and other types of social events with other schools. Not really a crazy house party, but it's something.</p>

6

<p>Do you think you would have had a more traditional high school experience if you stayed at home? Do you feel like you gave something up??</p>

7

<p>Well, yeah, obviously everyone who goes to boarding school gives something up at home. A good football team...(just kidding)... weekly parties .. being around your family ... an easier workload (usually - not saying that always!) ... being around friends you've had for the past 10 years...etc. And I'm not saying that I don't want those things. They would be nice. But if you do not want to give some of that up, then make that choice. It's not like boarding school is 'definitely' better than home, because for some people, it's not. And that's for you to figure out.</p>

8

<p>Olivia I love the comment on the football team, St. Pauls had yet another dissapointing year. In chapel they announce the scores of all the games, and when they announced varsity football won a game, they got a standing o Football really is quite dreadful at boarding school, well here at least</p>

9

<p>Really? Yeah. We were so surprised when Choate won the football team against Kent - it was the first home game and it was under the lights. And then we won on Deerfield Day, which was neat. But I guess that isn't saying much. ;)</p>

10

<p>is it common for people to leave boarding school sophmore year or the year after their 1st because it "wasnt for them?"</p>

<p>would it tarnish your permanent record? lessen your chance of getting into a good college?</p>

11

<p>It might. It depends on which school you go to. If you go to one of the top schools, then it might tarnish your record because the college might think that if you weren't able to keep up with the workload at such a prestigious school such as AESDC, then you probably won't be able to do it there.</p>

12

<p>Dating definitely happens and for those who work at it the relationship can be a lot deeper than it would in public school since you see each other all the time. Popularity is more of a freshman thing and it gradually phases out and people start hanging out with people they enjoy more rather than who they consider 'cool' or whatever. Besides, it ends up that you associate yourself with people who you do activities with, your dorm mates, your teammates etc.</p>