Getting really tired of the "party school"

Student Lounge College Life
1

<p>I'm currently a college Freshman.</p>

<p>Firstly, to get it all out of the way, I drink on OCCASION. And when I do, I don't particularily like it, but do it anyways because it's just the social norm. I always thought I didn't have a problem with drunk people as long as it wasn't me, but boy was I wrong.</p>

<p>In high school, I was searching for a large college with a reputable English and Business school, and I landed myself at a school that just happens to be deemed one of the top party schools in the nation. I've loved this school since I was a little kid, and expected the best and most optimal college experience. When I visited as a high school student, it seemed like an intellectual place and the party reputation didnt seem like it was true.</p>

<p>Again, I was wrong.</p>

<p>I got assigned to the second most crazy dorm on campus, but was fine with it because it was close to my classes and I knew I'd make friends who weren't there to party and I knew there'd always be somewhere else to go if things got really out of control.</p>

<p>Again, I was wrong.</p>

<p>Particularily in the first two weeks after getting there, I found that partying IS the priority here over academics. There are kids I know who don't go to class EVER because they're out every night, and people are pregaming on our floor on TUESDAY nights. Yes, TUESDAY. On the weekends here, all the guys turn into huge *<strong><em>s and the girls get ditzier than ever and it's just getting old. I thought this would end in high school, but during these times people lose all sense of respect and the only words I hear people saying to eachother outside my window are "</em></strong> you" and "faggott!!!" People come back at 3AM with bleeding scalps, bruises, battle marks and lost friends and then they puke or ** everywhere.
And it's like people think there's no other option than to drink on the weekends. It's just their duty and a part of their schedule, which is fine but also pathetic in some respects. They never take a weekend off. And if someone has a rough night, they're right back at it the next night.</p>

<p>So I found my friends quickly. We're tight and good. Except, despite how chill I thought they were at first, they all went out and got wasted the first weekend, and I stupidly came with. I didn't drink, and I immediately became their b*tch and ended up taking care of their drunk asses all night long. It's as if theyre completely different people during the week than they are on the weekends. And don't get me wrong; I'm talkative and have a ot of friends here. It's just this one barrier.</p>

<p>So I'm generally good during the week. But once Friday night rolls around, I become a loner because I'm ****ing tired of drunk people everywhere and I have no want to go out with my "week friends" because I'd rather do something sober. But the problem is no one feels the same way.</p>

<p>And really, ** no one. **</p>

<p>Every single person I have befriended here gets ****faced on the weekends, and there's no outlet. They say the party scene is avoidable, but the drunk people aren't avoidable and IF you do avoid the partiers/parties, you will be doing it alone. </p>

<p>Basically I want some advice on what to do. Everyone's going out right now, and I'm sitting in my room like "godammit, another weekend..." wishing it was Monday and wishing there was an alternative to the constant pounding liquor that happens here. And this uncomfortableness has happened to me for the last 3 weekends.</p>

<p>What would you do in my case? And don't say "try meeting new people" because I've already tried AND no one's willing to make new friends anymore because all the cliques are set.</p>

2

<p>I am willing to bet that this school’s reputation suffers as a result of this culture. I would advise a transfer to a local community college, do a 2+2; it saves money and boosts the GPA.</p>

3

<p>Tell me what school you are at. I would like to avoid this.</p>

4

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<p>Join the club. I’m doing the exact same thing right now. I’m honestly SHOCKED when I find people here who don’t drink/party, even though I know that at a massive public institution there’s bound to be a ton of normal people. </p>

<p>I’m trying to get as involved on campus as possible so I can find more people who like to spend their weekends doing other things than getting totally ****faced. So far just by going to call out meetings for various organizations/clubs I’ve been finding them. I’ve also been spending time with people I’ve met in class, and forging better friendships with them so that I can hang out with them on weekends instead.</p>

<p>I’m also tempted to do the dumb activities that my school hosts, like movies at the student union and whatnot. I’m slowly finding that if you make a point of separating yourself from the party scene, you’ll find less people who are inclined to spend their every ounce of free time getting wasted.</p>

5

<p>Indiana isn’t a party school in the sense that they have serious parties, but it has a mysterious East coast reach that gets a lot of the underachieving upper middle class losers who think that they’re going to be party animals in college (meanwhile, they’re more focused friends went to better schools) and they found a “beautiful” school in the Midwest that is far away enough from Daddy, close enough to be convenient, not as selecting as to be denied admission, but good enough reputation to be worthwhile. Most students at Big State U are going to place partying before academics in their freshman year, but Indiana is one of those schools where it is more pronounced, from what I hear.</p>

6

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<p>Read his location. He is at Indiana.</p>

7

<p>Well, these guys are probably going to flunk out at semester, or at year’s end. Happens all the time.</p>

<p>But anyways, you can do one of two things.</p>

<p>1)Do what I did, and transfer to a non-party school.</p>

<p>2) Talk to your RA, RD, or whatever about getting a room change to a less crazy dorm. If that can’t happen, talk to them about allowing you to move off-campus to an apartment. It may be more expensive, but your sanity is worth it.</p>

8

<p>Stick it out for at least a semester. There are more people there than you will ever realize.</p>

9

<p>Take a walk through some of the other dorms right now and see if the environment is much different than your current dorm.</p>

<p>Does your floor have a lounge with a TV? Hang out there for a little while and see if any other non-drunks show up.</p>

10

<p>I go to one of the biggest party schools in the country. Yes, drunk people are annoying. There are people who don’t drink though. Find a group of friends that doesn’t like to drink. I am a second year, still never gotten drunk at school, and have a great group of friends who also don’t really drink.</p>

11

<p>you know who else didn’t drink? hitler.</p>

12

<p>The OP and Leila appear to be at the same school complaining of the same thing…go make friends with each other.</p>

13

<p>I definitely couldn’t handle that. I agree that you should see what life is like on the campus elsewhere, and if you’re still upset with it then transfer. Remember that you’re paying money to live there- it’s definitely not worth it to pay all that money if you’re miserable and uncomfortable.</p>

14

<p>Crap. I start UCSB tomorrow and I’m in the #1 party dorm on campus and nationally recognized as a party dorm.</p>

<p>I hope I don’t have the same experience, but I probably will. <em>sigh</em></p>

15

<p>I suggest that you talk to your RA immediately. If that doesn’t work, talk to your RD and go on upward if necessary. It is waaay to early to accept this for the rest of the year until people go on probation or are expelled. When you talk to the residence life staff, tell them you want a room reassignment the quietest dorm available, perhaps a “quiet hours dorm” or and “honors dorm” (there are often non-honors students living in honors buildings.) There are always a few extra rooms for addressing problems such as yours, so go now while it is easier to switch. You will have a better choice of rooms and get to know your new neighbors while everybody is still “new”. </p>

<p>FWIW, both of my kids experienced the same thing as you, but luckily had decent roommates and neighbors who made it a little more bearable. I know some kids who switched rooms/dorms and it made all the difference for them. One person’s parent even contacted the school and demanded a resolution to the housing issue. Try it before you consider transferring to a different school.</p>

16

<p>I go to one of top ranked party schools in the country so I feel your pain. People study hard during the week and then let lose come the weekend. This is just what people do unfortunately. This is a time when kids are out on their own for the first time so its a natural response to test boundaries.</p>

<p>If it interferes with your studies, head out to the library to finish homework or find another quiet place. However, if it is effecting your living situation, I agree with some others that a room transfer is advisable. However, that is always a crapshoot. </p>

<p>I would personally stick around for at least the semester or year before jumping ship. Although it may not seem like it, there are plenty of people that are not interested in getting wasted beyond belief and it takes time and effort to go out and meet such people. Also, if you wait it out, you’ll find that a lot of kids (yes, even at “party schools”) get tired of that whole scene and slow down considerably.</p>

<p>Unfortunately, unless you transfer to an uber small LAC or maybe a commuter school, partying in college will be difficult to avoid anywhere you transfer (though not impossible…). </p>

<p>Stick with it. What is it-- a few weeks into your first semester? Things will get better once you set boundaries, find activities outside of bar hopping and, if need be, confront people with these issues. Club and other organizations will allow you to meet other people and you can still maintain other friendship.</p>

<p>Welcome to college!</p>

17

<p>I go to UCSB and the partying here is ridiculous as well. But I’ve noticed that after the first quarter, some of the students get more serious about school because they’ve been placed on academic probation. But it’s still a major problem. There are just so many more things to do that are interesting than drinking till passing out.</p>

<p>To the person who said something to the effect of “You know who else didn’t drink? Hitler”: Hitler also breathed air, ate food, and slept…and I’m assuming you do too. What was the point of you saying that?</p>

18

<p>Well, I commute from home and I don’t have experience in dealing with such problems… </p>

<p>But if I were you, I would camp out in the library when it’s the weekend. There might be people like you there, too. </p>

<p>So long as these partiers do not trash your dorm or make it so unbearable that you find yourself unable to sleep in your own dorm any longer, I would just sit tight. Eventually, people grow up, stop partying, and start getting down to business. Some even get expelled for poor grades and/or misconduct on campus. </p>

<p>Of course, I am rather optimistic that human behavior eventually mellows itself, so my advice may not be worth anything if you don’t want to engage in passive behavior.</p>

19

<p>Scootergirl-He mentioned Hitler to ■■■■■, and he got you.</p>

20

<p>I go to IU as well. I feel the exact same way.The only friends other than my roomates that i meet are drunk people who probably dont remember me after they sober up. Its definately an interesting experience. People here really do like their alcohol.</p>