Getting rejected by every school except my safety and I feel stupid for thinking I had a chance

Applying to College
1

Sorry this is just a little rant. If you have any success stories of people starting out in mid-rank schools please share because I feel like a complete loser right now.

So I applied to two safeties (UW Bothell, and UW Seattle) and got accepted. But now that a lot of decisions are coming out, I’m getting one rejection after another: WUSTL, Northwestern, USC, Georgetown. I only have Vanderbilt and Cornell left and obviously have 0 hope. Cornell was my dream school since 6th grade, and I feel like I’ve wasted so much of my life just constantly working and trying my best to work my way to the top. I know it shouldn’t matter, but it just looks sad when you get rejected from everywhere except the one state school that everyone else in your class gets into. It especially sucks because I didn’t even get waitlisted, which probably means I was so bad that they couldn’t even imagine me as a possible student there.

I’m aware UW is a great school. It’s also my fault for thinking I had a chance at anything top-tier. I shouldn’t even be upset that I didn’t get in especially seeing how competitive and selective this year has been, but I’m living in one of my worst nightmares right now D:

Just wondering - does anyone have any advice on overcoming this feeling? I feel like I’ve been crying so much that my tear ducts are dry at this point.

2

If your stats were in line with those of applicants from your high school who had been accepted at these places in the past, then you have no reason to feel like a fool. The admisssions process is brutal. Except for your state Us, all of the places on your list are reach territory which means that many fully qualified applicants don’t make it each year. If you erred at all, it was in falling in love with a reachy place. But the truth also is that by pursuing that goal, you stretched yourself more than you might have otherwise. If you do find yourself at one of the UWs this fall, you can walk into your classes with confidence that you are well prepared to face whatever the place has to throw at you.

3

You have every right to feel sad, disappointed, frustrated, angry with yourself. This is a very stressful, difficult time in your life and telling you not to feel how you feel would be pointless and disrespectful. So feel it. Let it hurt. Give yourself some time to feel however you need to feel.

And once you’ve done that, realize that, as much as this sucks for you, it is in no way a reflection of your personal worth. There are three possible reasons why you’ve been rejected.

One is that your stats did not make the admissions officers confident that you could handle the coursework at these schools. If so, what does that say about you? Not a darn thing. Some of the smartest, most determined, most hardworking people I know–in fact, most of them–have lower test scores and GPAs than I do. Those numbers don’t in any way reflect their worth. They can’t possibly tell an outsider how compassionate, selfless, and infinitely willing to compromise my best friend is, nor can they communicate how hard my SO will work to figure out a problem, be it technical or personal. Both are amazing people I look up to and simple numbers don’t affect that at all. On the flip side, some people I know with very high scores/grades are significantly lacking in these qualities and are rather widely disliked as a result. That’s not to say that all people with great scores are squares and people with low scores are inherently more personable–it means that there’s really no correlation between these qualities, and you are totally capable of having fulfilling relationships with others, the world, and your future career regardless.

Two, maybe you had the stats and just didn’t get in because you weren’t a good fit for the school. Doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. Everywhere has a culture, and if you don’t mesh with it, you’re gonna be miserable. That doesn’t mean you’re a bad person or not good enough–it means the admissions officers were doing their jobs, making their class the best it can be, which means not admitting people who have a high chance of being unhappy there.

Three, maybe neither of the above. Maybe you were qualified and a good fit but just got unlucky. Admissions is a tricky, often random game these days, and if this is the case, once again, you should not use it as an indication of your personal worth.

So, to reiterate. Let yourself feel bad. It’s ok. But in a day or two, pick yourself back up and start looking forward. Look to the opportunities that these schools will afford you. Find out how you can make yourself happiest and set yourself up for success in the future. It may seem like the end of the world now, but this is really the beginning of what could be a rather wonderful chapter in your life.

4

@abbidon @happymomof1 thank you (: I had a 3.98 gpa (uw) and took the ACT 3 times to get it up to a 34. I’m going to have 11 APs by the time I graduate. I’m guessing I picked the wrong schools or my application just couldn’t stand up to the competition. It does hurt to think back on the hours I spent studying just to boost those extra scores, grades, putting those hours into extracurricular and working on my essays, etc. but hopefully it’ll turn out okay.

5

You got into two schools so far. Maybe they were your safeties, so many of your friends are also going there, and you don’t feel special because you didn’t get into schools (yet) that you feel better reflect the hard work that you’ve put in. It’s not going to be any of the schools that are going to make you feel special. Feeling good about yourself and your accomplishments has to come from you. Keep working hard, even if it’s at your safety school. In the end that’s going to matter most, no matter what school’s name ends up on your degree.

6

My younger D is on the same boat. After she got accepted EA by the in-state flagship, we let her apply a few reach schools that have good financial aid and are at least at the same tier as the flagship. This is totally logical. There is no reason for her to go to a lower tier or unaffordable schools anyway. She also got rejected from most of the reaches already. We will do the same thing if we have another chance to pick the schools to apply.

7

Your mistake was that you didn’t apply to a few match schools that weren’t tippy tops. You aren’t stupid. You failed to consider that stats alone don’t get you into the most selective schools.

Not trying to bash you. I do wonder why this is so common. It’s either safties, or the very most difficult to get into, with nothing in between. If anyone reading this learns one thing from your post, it should be to apply to a few match schools. And you should never apply to any school that you don’t like or can’t afford. It’s bewildering how students only seem to think of this once they start getting rejections, because they have usually been on CC for a while.

8

Feeling your pain!
Remember “Where you go is not who you’ll be”
There are tons of stories in this book to boost you up!
Joe Biden went to U Delaware. Obama transferred into Columbia from Occidental. Can you even name Ronald Regan’s schools.
The name of the school means nothing. It’s what you do with your education
Keep working hard and you’ll go far!

9

And both UW’s are pretty darn good schools.

UW-Seattle is strong in many areas and you only have to pay in-state tuition to go there. In several majors, you’ll find UW grads ending up at the same companies and same grad schools as Cornell grads.

Think of the kid who’s the exact same as you but in ID instead so their only choices now are Idaho and Boise St. Nothing against those schools, but they’re not UW academically.

10

Remember, these schools fill a large proportion of their incoming classes through early decision. By the time they’re looking at the regular-decision applications, the probability of acceptance plummets.

Let’s take Northwestern as an example. This year they admitted 1,072 students through ED. Assume they will all attend because it is binding. The university’s target number for the incoming freshman class is 1,925. That means that after ED, there are 853 spots remaining. Let’s say they predict a yield of 50%. That means they would accept 1,706 applicants in order to fill those 853 spots. They received a total of 40,418 applications. Clearly, your denial is not personal.
https://dailynorthwestern.com/2018/01/08/campus/210486/

11

It’s a shock for many first through families these days. By the time they take their quota of first gen students, Posse, Questbridge, other feeder schools, legacy, URM and recruited athletes, there are too few seats left for regular smart kids with great ECs, stats and GPAs who would contribute mightily to the college. Keep this in mind. You have to have a hook, or it’s no go. When you hear someone has gained admission to multiple top tier schools, they must have been in one of these coveted buckets that all colleges need. Being smart is just not enough these days.

12

I’m so sorry. The world has changed and great students like you are having a more and more difficult time with admissions. Its fine to feel angry and disappointed but you are an excellent student, so lets talk about math and how you could possibly imagine you aren’t good enough.

  1. Your GPA is 3.98 UW. I’m a little unclear about how different schools handle GPA, but I assume that means out of 4.0. So you maybe got an A- once? That has to be nearly a straight A record. What more could you have done? Do you really think the 4.0 would have made a difference? NOPE.

  2. Your ACT. 34 is already in the 99%. You are in the top 1% of all test takers. A higher score would have made no difference.

  3. Your school choices. When you remove all the ED, first gen, URM, recruited athletes etc. all these schools have single digit admit rates. Probably low single digits. Your stats match the stats from these schools. That means your admissions chances were single digits. Look at just the statistics. You had a better than 90% chance of being rejected from each of these schools.

The only mistake you made was not including a few schools with better admission rates. But you have great college choices. You are an outstanding student and you will accomplish great things. The world is full of people with amazing success from schools you have never heard of.

13

@Lindagaf I think that the OP falls into the group that match schools don’t exist. I define that population as high stats kids where the state flagship is a safety and the flagship is highly rated. This is especially true when you add in the need for merit aid to the safety/match/reach classification.
My DS will likely be in the same spot in Ohio. Just replace the schools with Ohio State and Miami University.

14

@Eeyore123, fair, though on some cases, the safeties offer terrific options. In OH, for instance, you have Farmer b-school at Miami, honors tutorial college at OU, DAAD and musical theatre at Cincy, accounting at OSU, and strong engineering schools at a ton of OH publics. At at in-state prices.

15

Thanks guys :slight_smile: I feel a little better. Yeah, I agree it was unwise to only do my safety and all reaches. I was okay with going to UW and I felt like if I’m going to pay out-of-state tuition then it might as well be a reach school. I guess I underestimated how upsetting getting all rejections was going to be.

16

And in the first week of May there’ll be a list of colleges that miscalculated yield with surprisingly selective schools so you could always send an app to the ones you like better than UW.
What major did you apply for at UW?

17

UW put me into pre-science since they don’t allow direct admit into biology. I also plan to study art history.
You can still send an app after May? Honestly if I didn’t get in the first time around I feel like I don’t really deserve another chance.

18

You’re entitled to feel badly - rejection hurts. But it really isn’t personal (just feels that way). Kudos for applying to appropriate safeties - I am reading lots of threads about kids that did just as well as you in high school, with less good options now. My hunch is that you will absolutely love UW.

19

Only at colleges that miscalculated yield. They realize on May First that they’re a few students short (or many, depending on how badly they miscalculated!) So, they accept a few apps then. Obviously the most selective universities have few places and those are snapped up right away, so you have to be on the ball, as soon as a name is published on the list contact the rep, express interest, and apply through common app.

Always deposit somewhere by may first - for you it’d be UW. Did you get into honors there? If so, confirm.

I wouldn’t recommend a Biology major. There’s an oversupply of biology majors who couldn’t get into med school and the job market is oversaturated with them.

20

You wouldn’t be applying to the same schools that already denied you. Different schools. Besides, you are being awfully hard on yourself. It will never serve you well to have that kind of self-talk, that you don’t “deserve” something. Just stop that right now.