Well how to start this… Umm okay. I been having this feeling of being “lost” in life ever since I got into college. I never know what I wanted to do or be. From high school to college, its like letting out acaged bird out for the first time. I often question future and sadly, I get depress easily. I been in college for 4 years now, finishing all my GE courses and have declare biology as my major, even though I’m still unsure of my future. Honestly, biology major is a pain in the ass, it take so much time out of my social life. I lost most of my friends, I don’t even have time for my family, and yet I’m still struggle in that major. I’m not a very bright person, I don’t study well and don’t even understand some chapters when reading. I often spend hours rereading each chapter for a single class to the point where I don’t have time for my other courses like chemistry, physic, etc. Outside my school life, I have nothing but the virtual world to live in. I grew up with a family of gamers, so the virtual world is the only place that I relay on when I’m stressed, depressed, and woreout. I’m the youngest siblings out of my 5 other siblings. My family been pretty fuck up to the point where they all just left my parent (my parent is around 50 immigrant) and move up north to live their own life. Now I’m the only one with living with my parent. They are too old to work to pay off the monthly rent and been calling my other siblings for help. Sadly, no one bother to help. With my parent monthly money, we were able to paid off the monthly rent only. So we are mostly short on foods, gas bill, etc I been trying to look for a part time job to help a little bit but sadly no one will hire me becausd I have no job experience, have broken English, and a shy attitude. With each years as college goes on, I feel like my life is not moving anyway. Every years as the semester come to an end, I always get depress and sad because I don’t know how my life will be like next semesterr. With the problem at home, it make my feeling even worst. So I been debating if I should drop out of college and get a company job to take care of my parent, or stay in colleges and change major to something easier to graduate fast. Sorry for my broken English. I am not born in the United state and English is not my first language.
If you can contine to afford to attend college, you might want to think about changing your major to something that is not so difficult for you to understand so that you can get your degree finished. I don’t know what your native language is, but for example, you could study education and become a teacher of your native language. This is just one idea. Your campus may have a career center to help you to explore what types of careers might suit you, and also maybe show you some resources to help you find a part time job to help with your current financial situation.
I’m sorry to hear about your struggles but if it makes you feel better everyone goes through hard times and it all works out in the end. You can find happiness no matter the decision you make. It seems like maybe changing your major to something that interests you more would be wise but ultimately it is up to you. You should for sure keep searching for a part time job though and it sounds like you need something you enjoy in your life. A hobby like hiking or something to ease your mind and make you happy. Don’t look back and think about what could of been just look ahead no matter what you do. Good luck.