<p>After reading many CC threads last year, I was tempted to start one this year,
“ED - JUST SAY NO”.</p>
<p>Many parents have gotten into a similar bind as OP. It’s a difficult situation. Frankly I blame the GCs - they should reallllllly be clearly explaining the ED pros/cons to families before allowing it. </p>
<p>Since merit $ and need-based FA can’t be combined, many families end up chasing one or the other. </p>
<p>Debt tolerance varies from family to family. But my thought is parents shouldn’t be splurging on expensive full-ticket college bill if they have to go deep into hock to do so.</p>
<p>As a ballpark, the family contribution is between 1/4 and 1/3 of your gross income. I know…it seems high. BUT remember that colleges assume that costs will be met by past income (savings), current income (salary) and future income (loans). </p>
<p>And the FAFSA EFC should be viewed as the MINIMUM you will be paying for college. Most colleges do not meet the full need of accepted students. This means they do not provide enough aid to make up the difference between the Cost of attendance and the family contribution. Only the most well endowed (and competitive for admissions) schools are able to guarantee to meet full need for all admitted students.</p>
<p>If your financial aid package is not sufficient, you will have to turn down the ED acceptance. It sounds like your daughter has already applied to some instate public universities in your state. Remember, if your family contribution is too high at the ED school it’s going to be the same at other schools too (except a very few schools with extremely generous need based aid to families with higher incomes).</p>
<p>We are taking out 5K a year with the understanding that if our son does well, we’ll pay that off for him. If he doesn’t do well, it’s on him. Actually, if he doesn’t do well he’ll have to leave his private college as he would loose his merit scholarship. In any case, we kept the debt load low because we have to save for our retirement as well. </p>
<p>You have look realistically at what you can pay back based on your family income and what you anticipate your daughter’s income to be. Teachers cannot afford to take on debt, most lawyers have too. Remember that the more debt they go into during undergrad, the less freedom they will have for grad school and/or choosing a career.</p>
<p>NO college expects students/parents to pay the bills out of current income. It is supposed to come from past earnings (in the form of savings) or future earnings (which are discounted for inflation.)</p>
<p>Many schools will allow you to break an ED for financial reasons, but ONLY to apply to non-competitive schools (i.e. a state school rather than another Ivy). Otherwise, the entire rationale for ED disappears as students are able to shop packages even while applying ED.</p>
The ED school has no control, and probably no knowledge, of where else you apply. Why would they care anyway? If you can apply to another top school that will give you the aid you need, why should you be prevented? Please name some schools that do this.</p>
<p>I don’t think shopping a package will really be possible, you have to accept or decline the ED long before you will get a RD package. If you apply EA along with ED, then you might be able to legitimately compare, because you don’t have to withdraw your other applications until you accept the ED admission.</p>
<p>ED is not legally binding, since the student is almost certainly under 18. The reality is that you don’t legally need <em>any</em> reason to turn down an ED. And anyway, no school is going to force a student to attend who doesn’t really want to be there, or who will transfer after one semester.</p>
<p>My daughter just left to go play pool at a friend’s house and I told her what I had learned about demonstrated need and I appologized for getting us in this mess and she teared up and said what really hurts is that after all her hard work it was only worth $4000.00 (our package). Very sad.</p>
No. Nothing on the Common App ED agreement says anything about payment.</p>
<p>And the Common App ED agreement also says</p>
<p>
<em>YOU</em> are the one who gets to make this call, not the college. Even if they meet all need above your EFC, you can still decide that your EFC is unaffordable for your family, and decline the ED acceptance.</p>
<p>If the school didn’t use the Common App, their app will have very similar verbiage.</p>
<p>Labelness, my S did not apply ED but otherwise we were facing similar decisions about colleges at this time last year. Schools that S had visited the summer before senior year and in the fall, that he was applying to, became no longer viable options. Because of what our EFC was projected to be and the amount of merit aid S could expect to get based on his stats.</p>
<p>Luckily he liked and was accepted to the state flagship. Even though we are full pay there, it is much less out of pocket than the private schools we were looking at. But I felt really bad at the time.</p>
<p>labelness - So sorry to hear how disappointed your D is. Those FA packages can be shocking. Does the school offer a payment plan? Not knowing how much you have to come up with I’m not sure how much that would help but thought I would mention it. We make the cost of my D’s school work with a combination of my D’s $5,500 student loan, some college savings and the school’s payment plan. Instead of having to come up with $XXX in one lump sum for the semester we pay it out over 3 months. It isn’t easy but we are making it work. And as arabrab mentioned, our auto insurance did go down drastically and we are saving on what we paid for the ECs my D had in high school. D found an on campus job so she contributes to her living expenses, supplies, etc. We did talk to the FA office at my D’s school and they found a way to give her an additional $1,000 per year of merit aid so I encourage you to call and talk to them. You just never know.</p>
Same here. I had to tell my S, who had several acceptances at top 30 schools, that the ones that offered no aid or merit money had to be taken off the table. It’s not a good feeling, but I wasn’t willing for either him or me to take on $100,000K+ of debt.</p>
No - all her hard work got her accepted to the college and she should be very proud of her accomplishements in achieving that. The $4K package was the result of an equation based on extraneous factors such as income and expenses - not her hard work.</p>
<p>Labelness: You must STOP. It is OK. Look around you; people in the housing mkt and financial mkt’s are breaking contracts left and right. This mistake isn’t really going to cost the school anything. Most people don’t know the FinAid game until they bumble thru it or someone close to them, who is honest with them, shows them the ropes. Really, breath, it is the holidays and you should not feel this way and either should the rest of your family. You can break the Ed contract for all the reason stated in earlier posts. If they do not reconsider your aid package, you should, especially if this is not your only child. Clearly she is you first.</p>
<p>I want you to know a high % of kids are breaking their backs, working like little adults, with little sleep or free time throughout HS. When they can’t realize their goal, because of finances or not being accepted to their top choice(s) it is crushing to them, and the parents who where with them every step of the way. That is why the senior year is one of the most anxiety provoking years for parents. My point is, you will be OK and so will she, just hurry out any more applications to other schools before deadlines. </p>
<p>S1 did not get into his 1-2 or 3 schools, but the number 4 choice(not the highest rated he was accepted at) has been THE perfect school for him as it turns out. I am not saying this because of the “you end up at the college you were meant to” or “be happy where you are planted” statements; I just don’t think that is universally true. It was a horrible let down, a real crash and burn for him to not be accepted at any of his top choice schools. And, just so you know, it took me a good year maybe a little bit more to shake the feeling of disappointment for him. Seeing your son breakdown is REALLY hard. But into his second year, I just could not deny he was having the experience of his life, punch drunk on his school and friends. I still feel like HS was a form of child abuse in some ways- but all his AP’s and extra’s have contributed to his stellar experience thus far.</p>
<p>If you think you feel bad now, and decide to let her attend this school, wait until the ether of admissions fades and you are stuck with a huge financial burden and don’t know how your family can get her through the last 2 years. That is scary, having to ask her to transfer. I know several families in this bind.</p>
<p>Smart girl=good college experience - It’s an adventure and you are just in class V rapids right now. Hold on, it gets fun again!</p>
<p>Good luck. I love your “suck it up buttercup” phrase. That’s why I had to respond to you.</p>
<p>Don’t know what college The OP is talking about, but NOT ALL COLLEGES OFFER AN <em>OUT</em> FOR FINANCIAL AID. My daughter’s college, Elon, does NOT use the common app and their ED agreement says:</p>
<p>
They do NOT make an exception for FA. Now realistically, they’re not going to admit you ED if they can’t fund your EFC. But they also probably are not going to give you any MORE than meeting your EFC. They are not going to come to your house and drag your child to their college - but people who sign the agreement need to understand that they are committing to pay full price if need be.</p>
<p>I’m confused - did the OP not know their EFC when they applied ED? Did you apply and assume your D was going to get merit aid? I don’t understand how the amount you were expected to pay was a surprise to you.</p>
<p>FYI, our EFC is also more than 1/3 of our gross income. One year our EFC was $200 higher than S’s cost of attendance at his LAC - in other words, we were almost exactly the poorest we could be without qualifying for a penny of FA. We certainly could not come up with that much cash from current earnings. We had been saving via automatic payments to 529 plans since the kids were in elementary school. We paid the first 3 years of S’s college from those savings, his last year is being paid out of a home equity credit line. D will probably be about the same.</p>
<p>
EFC = Expected Family Contribution. In other words, the amount the family is expected to pay. So you were mis-informed, EFC IS indeed the amount you are expected to pay. Yes it is an obscene and ridiculous amount, but that’s what the number means.</p>
<p>Labelness, there was no mistake in applying ED to her dream school BECAUSE you are allowed to get a release if the financial aid package is insufficient. There is no risk to you and it actually smart to apply ED and get the benefit of slightly lower admissions standards. In most cases they make it work. If in your case it does not, you can just get a release and your D can still apply anywhere else. Work with the school and see if they can make it work. If not, you have nothing to feel bad about. Don’t let people tell you that she shouldn’t have applied ED. She did this exactly right.</p>
<p>martina99, You are talking about such an important point. For the parents still looking at these issues-if the EFC is above what your family feels they can pay, please let your kids know before they start applying to schools. Our EFC was above what we thought we could pay(older son was interested in UVa, Duke and Princeton-Duke and Princeton not known in 2005 for great aid). As a Virginia resident with UVa,
William and Mary and VT as options, it was hard to justify
going in another direction. We did not insist our kids pursue merit aid but also did not let them think we would pay for private schools beyond their (or our) means. We have been very happy with our public schools. Please discuss finances with your kids before applications are submitted! Both public and private work depending on finances,interests, goals,etc.</p>
<p>“The ED school has no control, and probably no knowledge, of where else you apply. Why would they care anyway? If you can apply to another top school that will give you the aid you need, why should you be prevented? Please name some schools that do this.”</p>
<p>Columbia University used to state so on their website. And the reason is that schools have an interest in preventing folks gaming the system. The point of ED is for schools to lock up students they know will attend if admitted. (And because it hasn’t worked out that way, some schools are eliminating ED all together.)</p>