Grade my essay?

<p>Hi,
If some of you could take the time to read my essay and give me a grade from 2-12, I would greatly appreciate it. Comments would also be very helpful.
Thanks!</p>

<p>Prompt:
Can knowledge be a burden rather than a benefit?</p>

<p>Essay:
In our world today, knowledge is everywhere. It can be easily be found on the Internet and in books, and ranges from scientific to philosophical ideas. We also hold information in our minds, as our memories. However, knowledge is not always a benefit to us. As seen in history, as well as in literature, it has proved to be a heavy burden.</p>

<p>During World War II, Nazi Germany systematically murdered millions of Jews in the genocide known as the Holocaust. Jews in areas of Europe under German control were sent to horrid concentration camps, where they saw barbarism of the highest degree. As Elie Wiesel mentions in his novel Night, he saw babies thrown into burning furnaces, prisoners subject to deprivation of food and water, and sons forced to burn the bodies of their own fathers. After seeing these horrors, Wiesel was burned with the knowledge of the atrocities. In Night, he describes how the Holocaust was forever burned into his memory. Wiesel in fact mentions that he hope to relieve himself of the burden when he put his experiences down in writing. For Holocaust survivors such as Wiesel, knowledge of the Nazi atrocities was no benefit; on the contrary, it was a burden that haunted them for the rest of their days. </p>

<p>Lois Lowry's novel The Giver also discusses the burden of knowledge, specifically that of memories. Jonas, a teenaged boy, lives in a world of total uniformity. People do not even see in color, and do not experience weather. One man in the town, the Receiver, holds all of the memories of past experience. Jonas is chosen to be the next such man. He receives the memories and sensations from the previous Receiver. Although Jonas initially believes that the memories are wonderful, allowing him to experience things others cannot, such as love, the knowledge eventually becomes a burden to him, and he runs away from his town. The new knowledge that Jonas received was initially a benefit, allowing him to experience special things. However, when he was the only person who possessed the knowledge, it soon became a burden, since he could not share his memories.</p>

<p>Memories and knowledge may seem to be benefits. However, when few people posses the knowledge, such as the survivors of the Holocaust, and Jonas in the Giver, it quickly becomes a burden. Knowledge, memories, and sensations are meant to be shared. When we do, they may benefit us all. When we keep them to ourselves, they can only weigh us down.</p>

<p>Add in some solid vocab and this could be a 12. For now, though, this is a 10. I like the way you used two distinct examples and analyzed them in a way so as to fit the prompt with a unique take (the idea of shared knowledge being a benefit but when trusted in the hands of few, a burden). Excellent tie-in with the conclusion, as well. The intro could have been better, but your examples did the job. The length is also decent.</p>

<p>Overall, good job! I normally don’t enjoy reading these SAT essays, but I liked reading your thought-provoking response to a cliche prompt. :)</p>

<p>@EngineBus2015‌ Thank you for the helpful and encouraging comments! Do you have any advice on how I could improve the introduction?</p>