Grade my Essay

<p>Assignment: Should modern society criticized for being materialistic?
Materialism is the thing that everybody loves to hate. Materialism is acquiring possessions and spending money. In fact it is a vital source of meaning and happiness in our times but most of us spend the time in production. To go in the flow I will explain my point of view through three lucid examples.
Being Materialism is not something benefiting to one because one has to work and to gain money. One woman named Clara always goes to her work early, and then she goes to another work. Clara is assiduous woman because she tries to spend all the time working and producing a lot of her energy.
Another example is a student who does not want to do his home works. Jack is not sincere with himself because he wants high grads without studying .Jack spends a lot of time playing football with his friends and ignores his studying. In addition to waking up late for the school. Jack failed at his exams because he did not study well.
In the foremost fable the ant the grasshopper we observe that the ant works all the summer collecting food to save in the winter while the grasshopper slack out all the summer and enjoys doing nothing. When the winter came, the ant found food to eat but the grasshoppers died from starving. Although the ant was working hard all the summer, the ant was saved from starving.
In conclusion, hard workers only who can fit in the life. Materialism is something everybody loves to hate. By the three examples above we observed that everyone has to work and to produce new things. People may criticize modern society for being too materialism, but in fact remains the most of us spend the most of our energy producing and consuming more and more stuffs . </p>

<p>Honestly, I’d give this a low score, probably around a 2-3 out of 6. Although you had the right idea in giving examples to illustrate your main argument, your ideas did not address the prompt. Your introduction and conclusion paragraphs talk vaguely about the existence of materialism, but do not address if we should criticize society for holding these materialistic characteristics. Additionally, your examples are a bit irrelevant (completing homework and wanting high grades is not related to materialism).</p>

<p>I’m sorry if this sounds blunt or brutal. If you learn to directly address the prompt, your scores could definitely improve!</p>