Grade my SAT essay?

Test Preparation
1

<p>Sorry if I'm ridiculously repetitive; prepping for Saturday's test. AH. Feedback is greatly appreciated. (this is the exact copy of what I wrote, complete with grammatical errors, etc)
And grade out of 12 please, not 6.</p>

<p>Prompt: Do people accomplish more when they are allowed to do things in their own way?</p>

<p>Creativity and progress are contingent upon autonomy: the more freedom one has to engage in meaningful work, the more one will accomplish. As shown by examples from literature and tactics used in businesses, people accomplish more when they are allowed to complete tasks by their own means. </p>

<p>In literature, "The Fountainhead" by Ayn Rand highlights the productive qualities of freedom. Howard Roark, the protagonist, is an architect who designs his buildings with a unique style; society's standards do not restrain him from creating the blueprints he envisions. And so, Roark's buildings are masterfully drawn erected. By the end of the novel, Roark has established himself as a rising architect. Peter Keating, however, does not have Roark's freedom: society's architectural conventions bind him and his designs are only mediocre. Ayn Rand further emphasizes the importance of autonomy when Keating falls from grace and loses his wife and his confidence. Because Roark could design his buildings in his own way, he prevailed over the more restricted Keating.</p>

<p>Recently, some businesses have adopted the paradigm of allowing employees to arrive and leave work at their own leisure. The paradigm states that the employee only needs to meet deadlines on time, but the means of doing so are up to the employee's discretion. Results were surprising: businesses flourished under this policy because employees were more motivated to complete their tasks and use their own methods of doing so. Having strict working hours actually slowed production. By allowing employees to choose their means of completing assignment, the employees accomplished more.</p>

<p>As seen from these examples, autonomy and freedom are indeed crucial to production. By placing regulations or forcing a certain method of completing a task actually hinders people from working at their highest potential.</p>

2

<p>This is a good essay! I’d say 11/12.</p>

3

<p>great, thank you :)</p>

4

<p>10/12</p>

<p>solid intro.</p>

<p>Solid examples with 1 flaw (in the first one).Who is Peter Keating? You failed to develop him and his sudden introduction in your essay confused me. Also, your 1st example examines too many points. if you’re going to use Rark, stick with Rark, don’t bring anyone else up. If you want to compare Rark and Keating, then do so since the beginning of the paragraph, or use both as separate examples.</p>

<p>Your conclusion is a little weak. The wording in the last sentence is confusing giving me difficulties in trying to see how you wrap your argument. Also, you might want to emphasize the very fact that “people accomplish more when they get to do things their own way”. You only denied the counter-argument in this conclusion. You needed to cement yours too.</p>