GRADE THIS ESSAY. :) It's amazing. Hopefully.

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
1

<p>I followed the AcademicHacker's method. I hope it's good. Please grade :)</p>

<p>Is it absolutely necessary for people to study creative arts?</p>

<p>Many classical novels demonstrate how economical arts are. Not only are they a great money-maker, but also it allows more social interactions between one another. Several examples from literature, social media, and current events clearly demonstrate that creative arts are absolutely necessary for people to study. </p>

<p>As demonstrated by The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorn, Hester Prynne would not be hired by anyone because adultery (in the colonial era) was considered a sin. Prynne only survives by her handwork- needlework. Needlework allowed her to sow cuffs on high officer’s jackets, babies’ bonnet, and other creative clothing endeavors. One part of the novel even states that everyone in the colony somehow directly or indirectly owns a piece of Hester’s handiwork. This creative art helped a fictional character support herself and her family. Without creative arts, many people would not be able to make enough money and this is one reason why it is absolutely necessary to allow people to continue study and learn the arts.</p>

<p>Etsy.com, an online boutique, offers a wide range of handmade crafts. It ranges from small stuffed animals to entire wedding gowns. There are millions of accounts and host an international market. But what truly make this site possible is creative arts. This talent, similar to Hester’s needlework, allows people to gain economic benefits. But unlike Hester’s, this site is real and tangible. It is not a useless craft. Handmade work is usually more original, custom, and special. This is another reason why creative arts must be taught- to receive more special and unique creations.</p>

<p>Disliked by millions of antisocial and socially awkward teenagers, parties and other gatherings are (in a sense) a place to make us feel embarrassed and look completely stupid. When I attended RYLA (Rotary Youth Leadership Awards) this last spring, I came as a scared, insecure girl. I didn’t know anyone and I didn’t have many social skills at all. The first moment on the bus, I realized that I was an outcast. Everyone knew each other and I sat alone. But the only thing that connected me with the person a seat across from me was my hobby, photographing. I loved photography and so did the girl next to me. We talked the entire time to camp and I have never felt so excited of what I enjoy doing. We talked about tips, ideas, events, and other photography topics. But I didn’t just meet one person, I met a variety of people with similar creative abilities. As cliché as it sounds, creative arts changed me socially and I don’t regret learning it at all. The last reason why creative arts are important is it allows people to build and connect friendship easier.</p>

<p>Music, drama, photography, and other creative arts are always the first to be cut from school Partisans of this belief answer that these subjects aren’t as “important” as core classes like science, English, and math. This is extremely untrue. The arts are more necessary as other subject areas because it helps socially and economically as demonstrated through Hester, me, and millions of users of Etsy.com.</p>

2

<p>I’m completely unqualified to grade this, but I would give it a 4 or a 5. I think the main issue was clarity, because there were some spots, especially in the introduction, that were kind of clunky and hard to understand. There were also a few grammar errors, so they may notice that. Other than those two parts, I think it was well written…my guess is 5.</p>

3

<p>Solid examples, but clarity was a problem and your conclusion was a little choppy and generic. But I’d say 5 as well.</p>

4

<p>Heres my two cents:
For 25 minutes this is pretty good.</p>

<p>But, there are a few things that you may want to try to do differently. In your thesis, for example, you should provide the crux of your argument: why are the arts important. The reason for this inclusion is that you want to provide direction for the reader, you want him or her to have a vague idea about what the paper is about. Yes: while you do state your examples, thats not enough.</p>

<p>Secondly, you might want to try to demarcate your scope so as to maintain focus. You go from literary texts to anecdote and that is…undulating…you know? I know its hard, but you want to focus your examples on one subject area if possible. This becomes easier if you dont write your paragraphs as a laundry list.
Instead of writing an essay where your body paragraphs are unconnected, you want to try to turn one paragraph into another and another. You want to implicate your first paragraph, look for inferences that your examples suggest, etc. For example, you could extend your second paragraph and address the counter argument that perhaps your liking for photography made you a more introverted person and therefore you made yourself an outsider that way because you didnt hang out a lot ( im not saying this is true obv) but im just saying by doing things like this- extending one paragraph into another- you get this unified essay with that reinforces your thesis and makes a compelling argument.
In 25 mins i wouldnt expect someone to be able to do these things but in terms of writing better essays, these suggestions are crucial. However if you just use some uncommonly used words infrequently youll get a better score. Thats the way the sat is; its less a measure of your ability to write than anything else</p>

5

<p>How can you write this in 25 minutes? Also, you are given only 2 pages for essay.</p>

6

<p>Also don’t get confused with your pronouns. For instance :</p>

<p>Many classical novels demonstrate how economical arts are. Not only are THEY a great money-maker, but also IT allows more social interactions between one another. </p>

<p>I’m pretty sure this is a grammatical error. It’s obviously not that big of a deal but I’m just saying… </p>

<p>Overall, I’d give you a 5. However, if you write this on the official SAT and that your 2 readers are a bit indulgent you’ll get a 12.</p>

7

<p>Thanks guys. I’ll definitely work on my clarity issue. I still don’t understand how I can improve, even though I read all of your post (thank you!). </p>

<p>I’m hoping (praying more like it xD)that my graders are easy. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!</p>

<p>A lot of you said that it is “well-written”, how can I make it AH-mazing.</p>

<p>Okay, my post sounds a lot like a laundry list… Sorry, woke up and saw these posts. :)</p>

8

<p>It might just be me, but the syntax is iffy as well. Some parts were worded in awkward ways… so probably a 4 or 5 for technical errors and other stuff.</p>

9

<p>thanks for the input! Definitely will study up the idioms! Thanks you!</p>