I was wondering what parents do to help their child get good grades in college. Or help them get good test scores on the ACT and SAT so they can get into a better college. What kind of things do you to help your children with this?
Also, how far would you go in order to help your child?
We did offer both of our kids the opportunity to take a SAT Prep course.
Regarding “helping them with grades” in college…um…no. That was their responsibility, not ours.
We did make it very clear that if they didn’t maintain a 3.0 GPA at least, that they would be asked to leave their pricey private schools and attend an instate public university in our state.
We also expected them to graduate in four years, and made that clear as well. It was therefore necessary for them to pass their courses the first time around.
We have paid for a SAT prep course and book and review books for AP exams, transported her back and forth to/from school for sports and other EC activities. Paid for a dual enrollment class when that subject AP class was not offered at high school. But all the drive and determination came from my D herself. She challenged herself in her classes and chose activities she enjoyed doing for several years.
I expect she will do this in college as well. We are here to love and support her, send care packages, make sure she has the supplies she needs for her dorm, can call home anytime she needs to and pick her up for breaks.
My parents read to me when I was little. No prep books no prep courses. They sure as hack didn’t do anything to help when I was an adult in college.
Imo prep can only go so far. At a certain point, the will and drive has to come from the student.
When my son was in high school, I’d offer him choices… Such as “You can go study, or you can help me clean the gutters”, or the dishes, or… He had his normal chores to do, but he always tucked into homework thinking that it was more pleasant than the alternative.
We help our kids with prep classes for the SAT not to get into “better schools” but to get better merit scholarships so less money out of our pockets!
If a child came to me and asked for help to pay for a tutor in college because they were having trouble in a particular class I’d likely help out if they had exhausted all other resources and were making a genuine effort.
Encourage your child to ask for help the first moment they don’t understand the subject matter in a college class. Or to talk to a counselor or other trusted adult on campus if they are having emotional issues. Students sometimes spiral downwards simply because they are scared or embarrassed to ask for help.
Parents can have an important role in their child’s college experience as supportive and encouraging cheerleaders.
It all starts in the early, pre-school years. We helped by reading to our kids, providing educational experiences outside of school, and letting them see that we value education throughout their schooling. We encouraged their curiosity and tried to help them find ways to express their individual talents and find their interests. Once they were in high school, we encouraged them to take a few risks and challenge themselves. They both took the SAT one time and were happy enough with their scores. To practice, we bought the book “12 REAL SATs” and they took several tests on their own at home to get the feel for the timing and the type of questions they would encounter. During the admissions process, we did take them to visit schools and helped them come up with suitable college lists, making sure we could afford the places they applied to.
By the time they were in college, we were only observers, and occasional advisers, but didn’t concern ourselves with grades. As to “how far I would go to help my child,” it depends on the child’s age and amount of help actually needed. By college, I wouldn’t think my place would be to help them ( except financially) unless they were failing or floundering. Sometimes you can help too much. Most kids learn better by taking responsibility, perhaps making a few mistakes and then making a correction them themselves.
I do agree that it does come down to the student when it comes to getting good grades. Some of you would, it would seem, help pay for a tutor if your child needed it. Am I right? The most important thing would be for your child to graduate college, right?
Also, it seems like a lot of you wanted your child to do well on the ACT or SAT maybe not for a better college but to get some advantage whether it was having the higher chance of getting a scholarship. Saving you money which is great! You wanted to give them some sort of advantage whether for them or yourself.
I’m curious why you are asking, Jbriones.
At what age will your “child” be an adult and start making adult decisions having to do with motivation and performance?
I am a college student but I am not a standard student you might say. I see students all the time getting stressed out in school. They are worried about if they are going to do well on this test or if they can remember everything they need to.
What I am talking about has nothing to do with motivation and being dedicated. There is so much information students need to learn that it stresses them out and affects their grades and performance. Just like if any of you don’t like giving speeches to groups because you freeze up and can’t remember what you are going to say. There isn’t a lack of motivation or anything. Maybe you just can’t remember what you are going to say and freeze up.
Maybe it’s at least partially because their parents helped them so much in high school that they never really learned how to study properly.
“Maybe you just can’t remember what you are going to say and freeze up.”
Practicing can help prevent that.
“I was wondering what parents do to help their child get good grades in college. Or help them get good test scores on the ACT and SAT so they can get into a better college. What kind of things do you to help your children with this?”
-We were always availble for academic help. D. asked her father few quesitons related to electiricity when she took college physics. she asked few questions related to HS math. Did we rmember? Of course not, not me, I remember nothing, I am blessed working in a field that requires no memeory. However, I could use D’s own textbooks to find what I needed to provide help.
ACT prep. was easy. D. did not have a goal of the “better” college, she said that she would do fine anywhere. However, she wanted to be accepted to selective programs and eventually she acheived it and attented at in-state public in the program that accepted only 10 kids. Anyway, D. developed her personalized plan for ACT prep. She realized that in her specific situation it made sense to prepare only math. So, she spend 1 hour every day for 5 days precedeeing her exam. She took practice math tests and wnet over every mistake, making sure that she fuly undertood the concept. I was there with her to provide help whenever she asked. The score of 33 was enough to get accepted into 3 programs out of 6 that she applied to.
Do you have test anxiety, Jbriones? Consider going to your schools’ counseling department to see if they have support classes or individual help for that. It can rally help to improve academic performance.
Help kids do well starts when they are very small. It is all the things you teach them along the way, not just when they need help.
I will go far to help my kids if they need it.
Aren’t people happier when they handle it themselves?
“Help kids do well starts when they are very small” - yes, I agree, it started when D. was 5 y o. Do not miss the moment when they got their first 5 min. homework. This is a precious moment to tell them that the school is the most impirtant thing in their lives. Actually, I asked my 5 y o what was the most important for her. You may be surpized by the answers. Nope, 5 y o kid will never tell you that the most important thing is their school. YOU HAVE TO TELL THEM! But 5 y o will listen to her idol - her mom, while 10 y o may or may not and 12 y o will NOT listen, for sure. As I suspected, my 5 y o told me that her swimming practices were the most important in her life, which I corrected right away.
Do not miss this opportunity with the younger ones, it is way too late for this speech in HS.
I never stressed the importance of school. I always stressed the benefits of learning. You first learn things directly from the teacher, and the more you learn, the more amazing things you find out about and are capable of understanding. School is just cracking open the door to a universe of incredible stuff. It’s unending discovery. The more you know, the better it gets. Discovering and understanding new and complex things makes our brains happy.