<p><<the difference="" is="" that="" the="" boarding="" school="" just="" happens="" to="" be="" near="" present="" family="" home.="" parents="" did="" not="" deliberately="" buy="" a="" nearby="" house="" so="" they="" could="" hover,="" rather="" than="" use="" in="" lieu="" of="" hotel.="">></the></p>
<p>@GMT On the contrary, I know several families who bought homes in the town of the boarding student once the student was accepted. It is not unusual at all.</p>
<p><< once the student was accepted >> </p>
<p>That pretty much sums it up right there. </p>
<p>OK, Iâve been lurking on this thread but can stand it no longer. Attachment issues? Arenât parents SUPPOSED to have âattachment issuesâ when their kids are in high school? Isnât being attached to oneâs child during important developmental years what parenting is all about? And to say that BS is designed to âferret outâ the urge to not let go of oneâs child??? People who donât understand a parentâs need to be close to their high school child (physically and emotionally) have attachment issues of their own in my view, they are not attached enough.</p>
<p>I myself do not have a huge problem with the mother purchasing the house to be closer to her D at BS. I agree with another poster who said everyone approaches BS and works their way through it in their own way.</p>
<p>But @connieanne, perhaps I misread it, but I am perceiving some judgment on your part about the a child attending BS in the first place. If I am correct in my assumption, then I think the Boarding School threads on CC are gong to be a frustrating place for you to visit. A decision to allow a child to attend BS has little or nothing to do with attachment or lack thereof. Thatâs a pretty narrow view of BS.</p>
<p>I think what some posters are saying is that it seems counter intuitive to allow a child to enroll in BS with all the personal growth, maturity and self reliance that one hopes for when making that decision, and then install yourself a mile away. Personally, I think the child can still benefit from the experience but I understand where those posters are coming from.</p>
<p>The reason I think buying a home to be near dc in BS is not such a great idea is the message to your kid. I might be off base, but Iâve always felt wary about letting friendlydaughter know how much we miss her when sheâs at school. I think feeling like your parent âneedsâ you (to the extent that they will follow you to BS and buy a house nearby) is a lot to put on a kid. </p>
<p>I could be completely wrong and maybe kids arenât bothered if their parents give the impression that theyâre falling apart without having them near. But for me, I would be concerned with loading this on my DD. </p>
<p>The other part of the message thatâs a problem is the implicit view that your child canât manage being away and needs parents nearby. Itâs amazing how well kids can rise to the occasion when we let them, and also how open they are to accepting the idea that theyâre not capable of handling everyday life.</p>
<p>I wonder how much grief that girl mentioned in the NYT article is getting.</p>
<p>Something tells me that the parents (in this article) didnât give that one a lot of thought⊠@GMTplus7. </p>
<p>(You know⊠before they did the NYT piece )</p>
<p>UmmâŠ</p>
<p><a href=âRich People Are Stupider Than You and Me - Philadelphia Magazineâ>http://www.phillymag.com/news/2014/09/22/rich-people-boarding-school-moving-close-to-kids/</a></p>
<p>I donât know about you, but I love mindless class warfare with my morning coffee. Iâm sure the schools mentioned in both articles are absolutely delighted with all the attention⊠Way to go, Helicopter Parents!</p>
<p>You gotta hand it to the author of the Philly piece: She knew absolutely nothing about boarding schools but sure knew the cost! </p>
<p>Nothing complimentary is going to come from the NYT with respect to boarding schools or private day schools. Most media has very little positive comments about such schools unless it is sports related. As for 7Dâs attachment, considering the source, all I can say is that I never heard of that particular media outlet and much less care what the far left has to say about most matters. I take their diatribe with a grain of salt and find it more entertaining than anything. Having said that, Iâll admit it is sometimes scary but then we start talking politics. </p>
<p>But you gotta love comments like:</p>
<p>
Thatâs great journalism.</p>
<p>It seems to be quite the popular sport theses days to take pot shots at people with resources. Not much you can do about it but carry on. If all those âstupid rich peopleâ magically disappeared it would become pretty apparent just how necessary they are. And yes, her focus on the exact amount of the tuition was not lost on me with either, I guess stupid people just happen to make a lot of money. Crazy right?</p>
<p>@ChoatieMom- I was thinking Pulitzer Prize. </p>
<p>@towerchute: Philadelphia Magazine is, you know, like New York MagazineâŠexcept for Philadelphia!</p>
<p>I like a lot of Sandy Hingstonâs work, but obvs. she does not get the âwhyâ of BS that well.</p>
<p>I was thoroughly entertained (key word: entertained) by that article. I donât think it was meant to be a comedy piece, but it certainly was! 
</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Itâs because rich people have more choices than the hoi polloi who have to just accept the default-- thatâs why itâs guilty fun to watch Fashion Police. </p>
<p>So late to this party, having just done with the NYT article. Am digging the big smiles of these parents, and the stylinâ footwear that would have me grinning too if I, or Mrs. C., was wearing it. </p>
<p>Reminds me of the suggestion by R. Scott Asen (Groton trustee) to move to a means-based pricing model for BS (8/23/12). Yes!! On sustainability, ethical, and purely douchey grounds, itâs so right. Plus, this article removed my reservation about the charitable-giving tax deduction issue. You can score with the deducted mortgage interest, ace!</p>
<p>@charger, are u on the right thread, or did u not get your morning coffee? That has to be the most random post Iâve seen yet.</p>
<p>Well, @GMTplus7â, I read the quotes by parents, such as my child only saw me in the hallways once, and thought they were pretty telling, but the photographs in the Times showing these families who have bought (or rented) homes near their childrensâ schools seemed just as interesting. They look very, very pleased with their arrangements.</p>
<p>As to Asen, he would have people pay what they could actually afford (âmeans based pricingâ), right up to the âactual costâ (the current full-pay tuition plus the remaining âgapâ). Some, or all, of the Times families would no doubt be able to pay their schoolâs actual cost, rather than being full pay and possibly making tax deductible gifts toward the gap (or more). Under the Asen proposal, they would lose their previous gift deduction, unless they choose to give beyond the actual cost figure. But, if they have mortgaged their âsecond homeâ near the BS, I suppose they would get another deduction on interest paid (correct me if Iâm wrong). I was riffing on your point that the rich have more choices than most commoners, some of which are to be found in the tax code.</p>
<p>Asen, a financier and Groton alum, as well as trustee, has not seen his idea widely embraced, but the editorial he wrote publicizing it is good reading, nevertheless. And maybe my previous comment is whacked without a prior read of it. ~O) </p>
<p>@ Sevendad A real New Yorker prefers The New Yorker but doesnât mean I read it. I usually get to thumb through a yearâs worth of New Yorker cartoons while waiting at the dentist office. </p>