Help convincing parents

<p>The University of Chicago has been my first choice for about a year now. Now that I've been accepted early, you'd think I was done - but now that I've convinced the admissions committee, I have to convince my parents. </p>

<p>My parents are pretty typical Koreans that think UChicago is simply inferior to schools like HYP. I want to go into finance, and my dad works in the finance sector. I've already done everything I can to convince him that in terms of career prospects, UChicago is arguably better, if no worse, than HYP. The issue is that this isn't what he's concerned about. He simply wants the bragging rights of a son who goes to HYP and so right now we're at odds. I have no intention of even applying to any other schools - and I realize I don't have much time left. Any advice?</p>

<p>I have indian parents and by this point I’m just applying anyways. I’m not applying to harvard cause I don’t have a 3rd subj test, but Yale and Princeton are going to reject me anyways, so I’m just applying thinking I’ll be rejected.
No harm done and then it’s Chicago for me!!!</p>

<p>Option 1. Toss in the applications half-heartedly. You can say you applied and you probably won’t get in. If you’re a super-snark, you could even do an intentional, “And that’s why I want to attend the University of Chicago,” just to rub salt in a wound. </p>

<p>Option 2. Don’t apply at all, and keep your parents somewhat po’d.</p>

<p>Option 3. Apply to the other schools sincerely, see what happens, and make a decision about it later. You’re what, 17? You don’t necessarily know where life is going to lead you and should you be granted admission to HYP, it’s not something to sneeze at. Heck, I’m somewhat older than you and I can’t make decisions about what I want to have for lunch. How do you know now what the best, most interesting, most productive college experience will be for you?</p>

<p>For my own sanity, let’s try to stay away from using ethnic backgrounds as a justification for why parents feel the way they do. All parents of all backgrounds want what’s best for their children-- parents just have different ways of showing it and use different indicators of what success means. Where I grew up, parents were proud sending their kid to a CC or to College Down the Street, because that’s what success meant to them.</p>

<p>Option 1 just sounds like a waste of $250-300. </p>

<p>If your parents just want bragging rights, isn’t having a son who turned down HYP better than having a son who went to HYP?</p>

<p>The “My kid turned down HYP” is a good angle.</p>

<p>If you’re looking to convince him that Chicago is just as prestigious, take a look at this years acceptance rates. (There’s a thread on the EA ones and such.) UChicago selectivity is going way up this year. It already was a fairly prestigious college, and it’s getting even higher. Not sure what that means for the college itself, but it may help to bring some stats to your dad about the future of Chicago and how it’s quickly going to be just as prestigious as HYP.</p>

<p>Try having him read this from the WSJ:</p>

<p>[OpinionJournal</a> - TASTE COMMENTARY](<a href=“http://www.opinionjournal.com/forms/printThis.html?id=110006623]OpinionJournal”>http://www.opinionjournal.com/forms/printThis.html?id=110006623)

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<p>Understand, as I believe you likely do, that he simply wants the best for you.</p>

<p>Friedmanfreak - have you been accepted at HYP yet? I’m assuming, since you got into Chicago early, that you’re applying to all three of these schools in the regular round. With this in mind, I’d argue that you should work diligently on your HYP applications, and apply in good faith. I say this because, if you do so, ALL you’re doing is giving yourself more options in the spring. </p>

<p>If you’re lucky enough to get into HYP in April, from THAT point, then concentrate on going on college visits, seeing what school is right for you, etc. It never hurts to have more, rather than less, options. If you’re still in love with Chicago in the spring, and you get into, say, Princeton, you can make a more educated decision on which school you would ultimately prefer, and also have a constructive discussion with your dad about the final decision.</p>

<p>In short, if you want Chicago and your dad wants HYP, but you haven’t gotten into HYP yet, ESPECIALLY this year in uber-competitive admissions, please don’t put the cart in front of the horse (i.e. make sure you can get into HYP first).</p>

<p>^ That is only one department, and regardless, UChicago econ = Harvard econ (at the very least, for undergrad). The Chicago School, in my opinion, relies too much on certain axioms and dichotomy’s that are overly simplistic and easily dismantled, and, honestly, with Milton Friedman dead and with what happened with the banking system (please, don’t turn this thread into a discussion about this), I don’t see it retaining as much influence as it had in the past. Regardless, it’s ‘influence’ is only so because of the opinions of the American people. If we were to compare their influence now, then Harvard’s econ department would trump that of UChicago’s econ department. However, you can’t go wrong either way.</p>

<p>As well, I can only give a comparison of one other department (although, I know that Harvard trumps UChicago in many areas and vice versa), which is the philosophy department. And, Harvard philosophy>>>>>>UChicago philosophy. This is not only true now, but if you look at the past, as that article that idad posted did, many important North American philosophers were/are associated (went there, taught there, etc.) with Harvard ([Leiter</a> Reports: A Philosophy Blog: So who <em>is</em> the most important philosopher of the past 200 years?](<a href=“http://leiterreports.typepad.com/blog/2009/03/so-who-is-the-most-important-philosopher-of-the-past-200-years.html]Leiter”>http://leiterreports.typepad.com/blog/2009/03/so-who-is-the-most-important-philosopher-of-the-past-200-years.html)) and very few with the University of Chicago. I guess it depends on what you define as an ‘intellectual hub,’ but, if you haven’t noticed, Rawls’ work has had a considerable amount of influence on our current president (and, if I’m not mistaken, Nozick’s (another Harvard phil prof) work had a considerable influence on the ‘libertarian’ movement which, at least partially, helped the Chicago School have some influence on the political scene in America).</p>

<p>cough…cough… deferred person venting bitterness… cough … cough</p>

<p>did I say that?</p>

<p>I fail to see how that post portrays any bitterness, but you and your UChicago-level intelligence/reading comprehension abilities must be able to deduce things from that statement that my feeble mind is simply not capable of doing (if that even makes any sense, which I doubt that it does)! It’s nice, though, to see the maturity level of some of the admits. However, for the sake of the OP, please get back on topic after this post.</p>

<p>edit 10char</p>

<p>Thanks everyone. </p>

<p>To clarify, I am not one of those myopic die-hard Chicago fans that thinks HYP “sucks.” Obviously, they are all very, very good schools. I am a Chicago fan though, and I get a tad bit offended when people automatically assume a school like Harvard is superior to Chicago in every imaginable way purely on the basis of popular opinion. </p>

<p>Cue7, I see your point in that applying to other schools can’t possibly hurt - just because I get accepted to other schools doesn’t mean my parents can force me to go there. My goal is to make them realize beyond any doubt that this is ultimately my decision and mine alone. I think it’ll make the most sense to apply to a few other schools. Of course, it’d be nice if my parents eventually ended up supporting my decision, whatever it may be in April, but who knows. </p>

<p>Once again, thanks for all your input, everyone.</p>

<p>My father’s indian and is trying to do everything he can to slowly push me away from UChicago and towards what he calls a ‘brand name’ like Harvard. At this point, especially since my mother has absolutely no problem with it, I’m just waiting for a decision from Cambridge (because I really really like the place) and I’ve pretty much made up my mind that it’s either them or Chicago.</p>

<p>I think the best thing to do might be to try apply where they want you to (it’s their money and they want you to do it anyway) if they won’t budge and hope they reject you. If you really, really love Chicago and actually do get into somewhere they think is better, try to get some numbers that show that people from Harvard could still potentially end up without a job (or something like that) if they don’t do well and try arguing that you’ll do better at a place that you love.</p>

<p>Good luck =).</p>

<p>Like Cue says, it’s all about options come April. There’s no need to paint yourself into a financial or academic. Be diligent in these remaining days and submit the best applications with your whole heart poured into them. When you have five choices with five different financial packages, then you sit down and decide.</p>

<p>If – IF – you get into Harvard, Yale, or Princeton, and your father convinces you to go there, it will not be the end of the world. You will learn almost as much as you would have at Chicago (maybe even a little more, depending). You will probably enjoy yourself a little more. Your ego will be a little more puffed up.</p>

<p>It’s hard to find a HYP student who dislikes it. So I wouldn’t worry too much.</p>

<p>^^no there are plenty who dislike them
Anyway, I would just apply and try my hardest at HYP. Compare fin aid packages and then decide. That’s just my opinion though, you don’t have to listen to me. I got in EA at Chicago, but I’m not responding until later when I hear from Penn, Cornell, and Yale so I can compare finances.</p>

<p>LOL, I am a Korean parent… suggested to apply to HYP but son resisted on Havard and Princeton. He had no interest. He is applying to Yale but his heart is set on Chicago. The only reason that I suggested son to apply to HYP is because their financial packages are good. If Chicago matches those schools, no brainer. I do not think U of Chicago is under HYP.</p>

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<p>I was actually in this position last year, and if they won’t force you to attend if you are accepted, go ahead and apply to HYP. Chances are - I’m not insulting you or anything, it’s just a matter of pure statistics - you’ll be rejected, in which case, you’ll be set. If you’re not rejected, however, what you can do is compare FA offers. Princeton and Harvard in particular have excellent FA, and I advise shooting an application at those two just for their FA policies.</p>

<p>I was in this position last year and sort of threw some halfhearted apps at some Ivies and Duke, and a sabotaged application at MIT (because, end of discussion, I would’ve had to attend had I gotten in). Sort of wish I’d worked harder on the Duke and Ivy apps, though, if only for the money comparison possibilities.</p>

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<p>True, I don’t have any friends at HYP who actively dislike their schools, but I do know a fair amount who feel they would have been happier elsewhere. Perhaps the grass is greener on the other side, but considering I was never wowing over HYP as a high school student, I understand that they’re not awesome fits for everybody.</p>

<p>This reminds me of my friend. His parents made him apply to UVa and so, for the favorite word essay, he said that his favorite word was ‘clusterfu**’ and that his favorite book was Everyone Poops. Now, this is taking things a little much to the extreme as they might (ultimately) get him accepted just because of the number of days the adcom is going to be laughing (the essay is actually hilarious and extremely well-written) from his application. It’ll show them that he has some guts. Now, if you really don’t want to get in (I don’t understand why you wouldn’t at least try unless you would be forced to go there if accepted), go for cliche essays.</p>