Help with my mother!

Parents Forum
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<p>Hey, I thought I'd post this here for a good angle on my problem.</p>

<p>I am majoring in business, i got into the honors college at ASU and plan to eventually get an MBA. However, I am and have always been interested in politics, human societies, and the sort. I would love to minor in something like anthropology, religious studies, or sociology. Thing is, my mom is WAY against this. She would rather me have a minor in the business field (accounting, finance, etc.) My sister decided to minor in psychology with a major in Marketing, and my mom was furious!! She even convinced my sister (with lots of force) to minor in Non-profit management, within the business college.</p>

<p>Is having a liberal arts-type minor that bad?? I think it would actually add another dimension to my degree, other than plain and usual business classes...but I'm not sure.
Is it easy to have a double-minor?
How can I convince my mom that this is what I truly want? I am so confused.</p>

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<p>There was a Professor at Stanford, and he recommended HIGHLY your plan, having something different to put on the table...such as philosophy, he felt it made for better people who understood the world etc...he thought laywers, busines majors, etc would do better having the social sciences, etc as well as the business courses...he felt it made for better bosses, etc..</p>

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<p>what would she do if you minored in something she doesn't like?</p>

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<p>^^ I don't think she would do anything serious, like disown me, but I would rather her NOT be disappointed in my choices. She would probably keep reminding me that "Anthropology won't get you anywhere" and play the diabetes card..."You'll need medical insurance, so you'll need a stable career." My worst fear is that she may eventually cut my funds thinking that I am not taking college seriously, not like that is end all, but it would be tough. </p>

<p>Maybe there is an article about this professor's views? I would definitely email it to my mom.</p>

5

<p>let me find it...if you are already a business major, aren't you going to be taking all those classes already? </p>

<p>I mean, if it were my child, I wouldn't want them to be so narrow in scope...</p>

<p>What are other business majors in your school minoring in</p>

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<p>Oops, I forgot to clarify, I WILL be majoring in business. Sorry. Still a senior. </p>

<p>But I've scanned over the ASU website from end to end, and essentially a business major can minor in almost anything (except things like engineering, nursing, etc) But I don't know what they usually minor in. </p>

<p>I probably shouldn't be too worried about this NOW, since I am not even sure if I'll like the programs at ASU, but I am pretty sure Ill want to minor in a liberal arts.</p>

<p>And yes, you do take these classes already at ASU, but my mom wants me to minor in something like...international business, along with my major, so that I could get the certificate for that along with my degree...Is there any liberal arts certificates lol?</p>

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<p>I find it hard to believe that there is an employer in the country that wouldn't hire you because you minored in a social science. To many employers, you would become much more attractive. </p>

<p>There are thousands of highly qualified students who MAJOR in a social science or even something like English and classics and get very good jobs.</p>

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<p>"How can I convince my mom that this is what I truly want? I am so confused."Do what you want ..don't pay atention to your mother..."mother i'm sorry that's my future that's my choice"</p>

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<p>^^</p>

<p>Yea, Ill probably end up doing what I would want anyways. I was thinking I could show her some statistics or article that would convince her of this. (I could always google)</p>

<p>Thanks for your help, really appreciate it.
I love my mom, she just gets way to literal or one-way on certain issues.</p>

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<p>I know your mom is only saying all this because she loves you and wants you to be successful. That's what mom's do. I think it's great that you care about her opinion, and want to show her articles and such. That might help. Sometimes parents need to hear it from others.</p>

<p>But, what to minor in is so far off. Spend the first year or two of college "dabbling" as your schedule allows. There may well be a few things you find out you enjoy that you've never even considered. That's the beauty of a liberal arts college. Don't feel like you even have to set your major in stone at the moment. Kids can and do change majors, sometimes several times.</p>

<p>Minors often happen because you took a class and enjoyed it so much, you took another one, and before you know it, are one class away from having a minor so you go for it. Some people end up with more than one minor. Often it's "accidental" and there's no reason to even make it a discussion ahead of time. I think you're borrowing trouble. Once you get to college, you often have far less control over your schedule, and might have to be flexible in what courses you take. You can also take courses in a multitude of subjects, and not end up with any minor at all. That's okay, too. And saves arguing about it.</p>

<p>The other thing is, if you're majoring in business because that's what you love, then you have a better chance of liking your life later on! I hope you're not majoring in it because your mom wants you to. Having both a major and a minor can dictate your schedule. If you concentrate solely on business-related major and minors, how will you ever stretch and grow and find out what you love and what you're good at?</p>

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<p>psychology is actually a great minor for business majors.</p>

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<p>"I don't think she would do anything serious, like disown me, but I would rather her NOT be disappointed in my choices."</p>

<p>You could scour the Internet looking for evidence that shows that people with your preferred major do find jobs and can support themselves. You also can get info to that from your colleges career counseling office. Show the info to your mom.</p>

<p>Still, your mom may continue to try to get you to major in what she wants you to. </p>

<p>At some point, all of us have to grow up and become adults, taking responsibility for living our lives and making our own choices. As long as we don't expect our parents to financially save us if our choices don't work out, then it's important that we follow the paths that we feel that we are called to. If one doesn't do this, one will continue to live one's life for other people, and that leads to misery.</p>

<p>I know middle aged adults who dislike the careers that they chose 20 years earlier because their parents thought those careers would financially support them. Yes, those adults are earning the money to comfortably support themselves, but they hate what they are doing. They also never took the time to follow their own dreams.</p>

<p>I wanted to major in African American studies, but bowed to my mother's opinion that that then new major would not allow me to be employable. I wish that I had followed my heart because I continue to be far more interested in African American studies than in my major (government), and African American studies would not have hurt me professionally.</p>

<p>One of my contemporaries who majored in African American studies is now a law professor at an Ivy League college. Another -- as a result of a job that she had after graduation -- met and married a well known actor who is also very wealthy. They've been married more than 20 years, and she herself has done well in the TV production field.</p>

<p>What has having a government major done for me? While I have more knowledge than most do about government, the major hasn't given me a boost in the job market. I would have gotten the same jobs with an African American studies major that I did with a government major. Indeed, having an African American studies major probably would have given me more depth in the field that I got my doctorate in, psychology.</p>

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<p>Employers today, want well rounded individuals. A minor in liberal arts will greatly enhance your business degree. By the way.....what are your mother's creditentials? Hate to sound rude but so often, parents' views are narrow minded, from their own supposition. They don't have statistics to back up their rhetoric. The business degree should suffice in securing a job with good benefits.</p>

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<p>The most fundamental, rather brutal questions are</p>

<p>1) Will your parents refuse to pay your college expenses if you don't major and minor in what they want?</p>

<p>2) If the answer to #1 is yes, are you willing to foot the bill yourself, through loans or other means?</p>

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<p>I worked with a woman whose son wanted to major in theatre. Both parents were against it. Their son had one of his professors call his parents! The professor told them that in undergraduate school it is the one time that one can study what they want to study, and that there is always graduate school (kid has his eyes on law school). Somehow the professor convinced his parents, though they were still reluctant, to allow it.</p>

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<p>I've already found a lot of info. Business major, anthro minor may HELP you get into grad school or get a good job. </p>

<p>This page at BYU has a bunch of links and info just for business/anthro folks.
Scroll down the page and read, follow the links. <a href="http://fhss.byu.edu/anthro/Anthropology/frmset5.htm%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://fhss.byu.edu/anthro/Anthropology/frmset5.htm&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

<p>GWU in DC
<a href="http://www.gwu.edu/%7Eanth/anth_prof.html%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://www.gwu.edu/~anth/anth_prof.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

<h2>Law and Business. Law and business schools follow the same pattern as medical schools, in part because leaders in these fields have become more aware of the value of international perspectives and of the need to communicate across cultural and national boundaries. Students with anthropology training have increased success in graduate programs and the job market. In recent years, cultural anthropologists have been instrumental in helping former Eastern Bloc countries to overhaul their legal and economic systems. Moreover, as business leaders discover "corporate culture," anthropologists have been hired to participate in systems analysis, human resources, and personnel management. One of the most promising areas of business for those trained in anthropology is advertising, where anthropologists have been hired for such projects as promoting breast-feeding in eastern Africa and educating newly enfranchised South Africans about elections.</h2>

<p>I think if you mom is willing to read up on this she'll find you have a better chance of a job in business with documented thinking and writing skills than a minor in another business area. Also, lets say you end up wanting to go to law school with a focus on business law - anthro training will help with the LSAT, with legal writing and logical thinking. The idea that pyschology or anthropology are sort of anti-business is old fashioned. NO corporation out there is going to ignore the research in these fields, or devalue the training given.</p>

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<p>Since you are a senior in high school, this battle is WAY too far off to have now! Try your best not to engage your mother in conversation about specific courses of study. </p>

<p>Good luck--this from a mom who has a bad habit of having detailed discussions about controversial subjects with my kids which won't happen for ages!</p>

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<p>A) I agree with your Mom to the extent that an accounting minor is often a very good choice for anyone with an interest in combining liberal arts with business. Not only does it increase your employability, if you decide to start your own business someday, you have a working knowledge of how to keep up with cash flow and finances - something that often sinks new businesses</p>

<p>B) Because I agree with Mom on #1, look into double minors, it may well be doable, depends on how many classes needed for each</p>

<p>C) You are a high school senior, much of this may change by this time next year, so don't get too set in your thinking yet</p>

<p>D) Fight fire with fire. Tell Mom you are considering majoring in psych or soc or whatever, with a minor in accounting, because you are concerned about employability. Once she realizes that you have concerns about your future, and are planning to enhance your marketability, that business major and liberal arts minor may look more attractive, with or without the double minor.</p>

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<p>When I was in college I majored in Accounting and minored in management. I found out mid way through my junior year that I hated accounting. I wanted to change my major to history. My parents were very opposed to this. Even though I was paying my own way through school, I gave in and did not change my major. I ended up never working in accounting. I worked in fields where all they cared about was the fact that I had a degree. The major didn't matter. I've always wished that I had stuck to my guns and done what I wanted.
If you want to have a nonbusiness minor-do it! Your parents may be disappointed, but most children do disappoint their parents at some point in their lives. Parents who truly want your happiness will come around, and will respect your choices, even if they don't agree with them.</p>

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<p>Marian had the key questions nailed. With my father, I went through a similar disagreement. And basically it ended when I said, "Dad, I'd rather not finish my degree than listen to your haranguing about what you think I should do." And I wasn't b's'ing him -- I was dead serious. And he shut up and realized that the sky hadn't fallen because I made my own choices. But the risk here in this kind of approach is that she could take you up on the offer not to pay your tuition. Then you really have to be prepared to go it alone, as I was. And I realized I should have had the discussion long before, because I had eaten a lot of bull for no good reason.</p>

<p>You've got to go with your heart. Don't live only the life your parents want you to live; live the one you want.</p>