<p>I think it depends on the type of black girl. If she's the type of black girl who spends the majority of her disposable income on a combination of:</p>
<p>a) hair
b) nails
c) clothes
d) shoes</p>
<p>...or if she is obnoxiously loud, is judgemental of anything different from what she and her friends do whether it's music, fashion or hobbies, is mildly racist against white or asian people and their traditions/music/fashion/hobbies, or generally wears her racial background and social class on her sleeve, then I'm not interested.</p>
<p>If she is friendly, fun, intelligent, and doesn't dress or act like she has something to prove to the world, then I could totally be interested. But I must say, black women who fit this description are extremely rare in my experience. Even if they sorta do, they'll often surround themselves with friends who are the first kind of black women, which just ruins it. I am a half-black male btw.</p>
<p>I also find (straight girl) that I have a tendency to date people within my race and to be attracted to those of my own race first and foremost. That being said, I have found those of other races attractive... I just prefer my own race for dating purposes and find those of my race to be the most attractive to me.</p>
<p>Does that make me racist? I think not. Try flipping the situation around and it becomes clear how foolish it is to think that someone who finds his/her race the most attractive is racist. After all, would someone who finds himself/herself more attracted to a race that is not his/her own be considered racist against his/her own race?</p>
<p>i completely agree with UNLVChic. i think a large part of it has to do with how you were raised. i was born and bred in beverly hills and dont feel that i fit any stereotype be it looks, music taste, or fake hair. if you can tell what race i am (and many cant because, no, not all black girls look the same - link to my facebook for a reference) i often hear the "wow youre so white" that UNLV is referring to. i like indie rock, i dont wear matching track suits, im not that good at basketball, and i hate hoop earrings. and after knowing me for 5 minutes, this doesnt suprise anyone because they start to see me as an individual and not a skin color. spend 5 minutes with most people and youll see that they dont fit any one stereotype either. side note: ive only ever dated white guys, i simply havent met a black guy im attracted to yet.</p>
<p>littleathiest, you do have a good point, although I don't share the same view. </p>
<p>But again, that doesn't really address another issue we brought up before: if this is true, then why don't redheads stay together, darker skinned whites stay together, and blonde-haired blue-eyed people stay together? I think personal preference for skin color comes from a variety of things, including socio-economic pressures and psychology.</p>
<p>I think your issue is more of a cultural one than a skin color related one. I know an Indian friend who is not very religious and very very progressive and liberal. However, he would still like to marry and Indian girl to keep the religious option open for their offspring and to keep family relations high. I know a Korean girl who thinks the exact same thing. You may not admit that this is the reason, but sometimes it is.</p>
<p>And in this case, I don't think it is racist at all. It's just like certain Jews who want to preserve their culture, so they marry within themselves. I think it is a beautiful thing, and makes the world more culturally diverse and interesting.</p>
<p>again why are all of you making stupid generalizations about black girls? Have you met them all? Just because I am not loud and obnoxious does not mean that I am different than other Black girls, it simply means that I am not loud and obnoxious. </p>
<p>And it's very insulting to hear other Black girls refer to their fellow sisters in such a way. There are white girls who care only about shoes and clothes and who wear extensions, there are many Asians who do the same thing(where do you think the hair comes from), you'll find a lot of Latinos with hoop earrings. </p>
<p>By the definition given above on what racism is, all those comments seemed pretty racists to me.</p>
<p>I don't think it's right to label who won't date outside their race as "racist". Like lollybo says, it's more of a cultural thing, and it exists everywhere.</p>
<p>I'll give you two examples. I grew up in Nigeria, and was raised by a grandmother who kept admonishing us never to marry a white person, citing examples of family friends who married English guys after studying abroad. I found that really funny! But funnier still, while I was in Zimbabwe on a gap year, I met a white Zimbabwean, really cool guy and very old too, who adviced me never to marry a white girl, even though we got along well, etc. He told me he also told his sons the same thing [not to get involved with black girls] on their way to college, saying that different skin colors brought trouble! But I never found any of this stuff racist at all; it's just looking at stuff from a cultural point of view.</p>
<p>I've been in college here for year now and have met Americans of all skin colors and cultures, and girls of various countries from Ethiopia to Mongolia, the Maldives to Brazil. I get attracted to be sure, but as a personal philosophy, I'm not interested in longterm commitment until after college; I just haven't seen much of the world yet!</p>
<p>But I do frown on making generalizations about a group of people, be it girls of a certain race, or any group of people on earth for that matter. I take each person as an individual, and don't generally like getting into discussions about who is "hot" and who isn't. From time to time you hear a lot of comments, e.g. "Mixed-race girls are the hottest", etc. For me, beauty is only skin-deep, and charm is deceptive. Flesh is nothing...</p>
<p>Jrock, your upbringing is still not an excuse to be prejudiced. Most of the members of the KKK(sorry to give an extreme example) were brought up to hate Black people, Jewish people, Catholics, and anybody else different then them, but that doesn't mean that it was ok for them to lynch people.</p>
<p>But I accept your second statement.</p>
<p>For me it's a little close-minded to say that I will only marry someone my own "race". My parents would love for me to marry a nice Igbo man, but I like to put that in God's hands because i realize that I am not in charge of my destiny, so why try to predict things.</p>
<p>Waitingforjuly: "i always wondered, is it because we aren't submissive like some white girls. I know we do not let anyone disrespect us and we will let u kno when it happens"</p>
<p>But of course that's not at all racist when you say it. ;)</p>
<p>waitingforjuly 21 im not sure if you were referring to the comments i made, but i was simply stating stereotypes which i dont fit. a white girl from kentucky could make the exact same arguments to defend herself from being labeled as white trash. the fact of the matter is, most stereotypes, while not true for all, are born from truth.</p>
<p>WaitingforJuly, I totally see where you're coming from. I am also Nigerian (I moved to the US when I was six) and my family wants me to marry a nice Oron boy...but I am open to whomever God wants me to be with. It's funny bc my aunt was telling me just the other day that there are quality Oron men out there you just have to wait patiently for them to find you. But I think it is alot harder for immigrants of any counry to date/marry outside their race bc of the huge cultural differences..like how do you explain to a a white person what foo foo is?!</p>
<p>In reference to Black female stereotypes, I think that most of the sterotypes are formed by the media, not only in rap videos but in "black" movies and shows, like Barber shop, Girlfriends, and Madea. There really aren't that many soft-spoken black women who don't speak ebonics and are characterized as insolent in movies and videos. This is sad but true....</p>
<p>coopertemplegrl, it's just that I don't think we, as Black girls, should reinforce the stereotype, and I understand there is one, by saying things like "I don't fit that stereotype". You not being loud and obnoxious, does not make you unusual as Black girl, but just someone who is not loud and obnoxious.</p>
<p>Wow, I had some catch-up reading to do when I woke up today. I love how many of you are calling me racist...You weren't even clear about my post...you were assuming I meant this or that. What I said was, I like black girls as PEOPLE, but I wouldn't date anyone outside of my own race because that's just the way I am. I should have been a bit more clear by saying that's just the way I am because I am not attracted to anyone but members of my own race because clearly anyway else of saying this is, <em>gasp</em> RACIST! If you guys weren't sure of what I meant, you could've asked before you plastered me with the title of "racist." Not that I should even have to defend myself on a message board.</p>
<p>That's another stereotype often associated with blacks...not saying I agree with it, but...Many black people think for some reason they are experts on "race" relations. They feel they need to go around lecturing us about "race" and our "racist" tendencies.</p>
<p>waitingforjuly21 the fact is there is a stereotype. the fact is i dont fit said stereotype. reread what i wrote. i said that if you talk to any one person for more than 5 min you will see that they dont fit a stereotype and that each person is an individual. i didnt say it was unusual to mean a black girl who isnt loud and obnoxious, nor did i say i was unusual. i simply said, i dont fit the stereotype.</p>
<p>coopertemplegrl, she's saying that, by acknowledging the stereotype, you are kind of making other people who aren't Black think that this is the image of Black girls. And I don't think she was specifically targeting you in particular.</p>
<p>And ur going to Cornell this fall, im a sophomore there, if u have any questions feel free to PM</p>