I get lolling about in PJs at home with your nuclear family. That was also a Christmas morning thing at my house growing up. And, if you aren’t going anywhere else and you don’t have a need for family photos - then sure! And, if you want china and crystal and sterling and PJs at your breakfast table - sure!
Here is what I don’t get - if you are leaving your house and you have to change into something other than PJs anyway to go to the family meal/gathering - it is just as easy to put on something, “nice,” as it is to put on something bummy. I think one can be dressed a bit nicer and still be comfortable. Those are mutually exclusive.
But, I have heard the message - you do you and let others do them. I will try to keep that in mind and not worry about how disparate the dress standards are in the family photos!
Depending on your lifestyle and perhaps field of work, khaki pants and a sweater IS dressing up. And for some people not comfortable. My husband doesn’t own a sweater but he can wear a nice brand name quarter zip fleece. I dress for work daily in a skirt or dress with tights or bare legs, but I would have to look in my closet to even see if I have a pair of pants that are not pointe leggings or colored denim. Seriously, I do not own “pants”. Haven’t had a pair of black pants in my closet for years.
If the human interaction is what you want it to be - for me that includes lots of hugs, laughter, story telling, teasing, humor, gratitude for being together and having fun, who cares what people are wearing?? Who cares if the place setting is Haviland china or Chinet?
I’m more concerned if the mashed potatoes are fluffy and there is plenty of gravy than the clothing that gravy might get dripped on.
I recognize that family get togethers range from formal and stuffy to casual and funky. And lots in between. I like when we all share here. It opens eyes to other situations. But also, it often makes me super grateful for our own situation.
This is incorrect. You can think that, but it’s just not true. When people have to wear something they don’t like to wear, even if it’s not scratchy or too tight or whatever, it can take them out of their comfort zone and therefore be uncomfortable for them.
I’m sure you can think of some outfits that you would feel uncomfortable in just because they are not your style — maybe overalls or a sweatshirt with a college logo on it or maybe a really low-cut dress that shows a lot of cleavage or maybe a super modest dress. For some people “smart casual” is uncomfortable for these same reasons. It’s just not who they are or who they feel like being on the holidays.
And again, don’t make your happiness contingent on what other people wear. You do you! Bling it out if that makes you happy, but don’t expect others to conform to your ideas. That’s asking a LOT of people at the holidays. I would just not go probably or would hate every minute of it if other people told me what to wear or even had an expectation of what I should wear.
This thread brings back my memory of my daughters first Christmas with my mom, I wore a nice outfit my husband bought for me for Christmas and that outfit was ruined by breast milk, so maybe that’s why I don’t wear nice clothes at home anymore. But the trend of wearing PJs on Christmas days are only in the last 10 years, maybe it’s something to do with weight gain. Before that we put on casual clothes for Christmas. I don’t own anything red for Christmas, but I do have Christmas PJs.
I rarely wear them. I just know I have a pair. Closest thing to a black pant I have.
So I’m wondering what constitutes “PJ’s” to people? Actually sold as PJ’s pj’s?? (I have one silky short set that could constitute actually PJ’s). Is a flannel pant or sweat pant pj’s? Leggings? A hoodie?
Many holiday family gatherings also include the tradition of having a game on at some point in the day. Our T-Day is at a huge Detroit Lions household so you can bet that someone might be wearing a Lions sweatshirt.
Oh, no! I meant to type NOT mutually exclusive!!! ACK!! I think you caught that.
I am not telling anyone what to wear. I am just venting here.
Honestly, I am not happy about having to go, in general. But for ds, we wouldn’t go at Christmastime. So, maybe be general unhappiness about it is just manifesting through this complaint.
“ And, my family would have done things differently.” - It’s hard that you’ve not been able to be with your own family for the holidays. But if it’s been a long time since you’ve done so, keep in mind that even your own family might be doing things differently in 2022. I’m not with my Dad’s extended family (most of the older ones now long gone) at the Holidays, but based on the FB photos it’s much more casual than when I was a kid.
H and I went from party clothes (pre-kids), to church clothes, to nice casual wear to pajamas (the latter for just the two of us at home.) Most of the time in recent years, H and I have just put on colorful tops (with our pajama bottoms) for Skype calls with S.
My family is big with pictures and this started before social medias. My brother would take every combination and permutation of pictures before we were allowed to eat. We all knew to get dressed or we would stand out.
We used to complain about my brother taking pictures, but now we have pictures of all nephews and nieces lined up together (oldest to youngest) from when they were babies to young adults.
I may have shared this holiday photo story before, but I’m going to share it again.
My friend was one of three siblings. Her mother took a photo of all of them dressed in their Christmas finery in front of their Christmas tree each year. As you can imagine, the level of enthusiasm by the children waned over the years. One year when they were in that 10 - 15 year old range, she forgot to take the photo. They always had a real tree and threw it into a pond on their property. She made the eldest drag it out of the pond and manually hold it up and took a picture of three very cold, very irritated tween/teens standing beside it on the edge of the pond. It is now her absolute favorite of all of those photos!
If I already posted this, sorry.
I got a relative a nice dress as a present one year, and I got the same dress for me.
Well wouldn’t you know, we both wore that dress to Thanksgiving. It was during the time we got more dressed up than we do now. We all had a good laugh.
We are a nice jeans and nice tops family. Like you’d wear to a nice trendy restaurant. No one but my 90 year old mom wears a dress. She wears pants if it’s really cold. But not jeans. She remembers them from the old days when they were stiff and uncomfortable. She was greatly surprised a few years ago when she asked my daughter how she could be truly comfortable in jeans and my daughter had her pull on them. My mom had no idea how stretchy they had become.
@Hoggirl - I really miss my family and the traditions I grew up with at the holidays. My family was also fancy, my husband’s family is much more casual. My aunt always threw a big Christmas Eve that was dressy, with incredible food in a beautiful setting. Now they have downsized to a small condo and we still go there and it’s still great, but not fancy. I miss dressing up! We host Thanksgiving and Christmas Day, and we are smart casual. Nice jeans & sweaters. Maybe a comfy knit dress and boots. My good friend & I had a talk about this a few years ago, she’s from Connecticut but now lives in Colorado. They were coming back to CT for Christmas and her teenaged son could not understand why she was “obsessed” with him wearing a collared shirt when he wore t-shirts to school every day!
